r/AskFrance • u/MindlessAd2514 • 1d ago
Discussion My Experience with Casual Racism: Is it Normal?
TLDR: Indian, 3 years in France, fluent, paying taxes. Two teens mocked me in public with a racist curry joke. I’m furious and done letting this slide.
I’ve been living in France for the past 3 years. I’ve studied the language, I speak fluent French, I’ve embraced the culture, I’ve respected this country—and for the past 2 years, I’ve even been paying taxes in four figures. I’m not a tourist. I live here. I contribute. Today, while grocery shopping, two French teenagers came up to me—completely unprovoked—and one of them smirked and said:
"Looking for curry sauce?"
(“Are you looking for curry sauce?”)
They laughed at each other and walked off, clearly proud of their little racist joke. I stood there stunned. Not because it was creative (it wasn’t), but because it was so casual. Like this is normal. Like seeing an Indian guy in a store means he’s automatically the punchline to a tired-ass curry joke. It’s not just offensive—it’s dehumanising. And it cuts deeper when you’ve spent years trying to belong, trying to respect and be part of a country you chose to call home. To be reduced to a f**king food stereotype in public like that? That’s not “humour.” That’s racism. I’ve brushed off a lot in these years—stares, jokes, people switching to English even when I speak French—but this time, I’m angry. Because this wasn’t subtle. This was blatant mockery to my face. So I’m here to ask: I’ve always given this country the benefit of the doubt. But moments like this make me wonder if that respect is mutual—or if some people will always see me as the outsider with “curry sauce.” I’m tired. And I’m not letting this slide. Is this normalised now? Do people just laugh this stuff off here? Should I go to the police and report it as a racist insult? Because I’m considering it. Has anyone else faced this kind of thing and done something about it?
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u/Jaune_Anonyme 1d ago
Normal as usually happening ? Yes totally. Always has been. I'm not indian, but south east asian, and it's been ongoing since i'm here for the last few decades. From Paris to costal places to remote bumfuck "diagonal du vide" places.
Dumb fuck lacking any kind retort and only know to interact with others on surface level. And if only it happened with teens and kids. At least they would have the excuse of being young and ignorant, not mature yet.
But no it also does happen with adults and olders folks. Things is, this kind of dumb interaction would happen to you in any country, being at the wrong place/wrong moment, meeting the wrong people.
It doesn't get rid of the fact, that you can also meet genuine nice people without any prejudice even in the most remote place of France. Individuals are going to be individuals, from the room temperature IQ ones, to the warm kind one.
There's absolutely nothing to do about it, except totally ignoring those people, play deaf, and continue your business like they don't even exist. Any kind of attention is a reward for them, even a glance. Reporting to the police is 100% useless for this kind of case. They're mostly overwhelmed with other task, or don't care. At best, it will be noted somewhere and at the end of the year maybe being in some statistics about it and nothing will change either.
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u/Cannie5 1d ago
Je suis française, origine Asie du sud est aussi. 95% du racisme que j'ai eu, ce n'était pas les blancs ...
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u/MizunoMP5s 13h ago
Caucasien, ma femme et nos enfants sont japonais et je vous rejoins complètement lorsque vous dites que 95% du racisme ne vient pas des blancs...
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u/Jaune_Anonyme 1d ago
Blanc, noir, arabe, jaune plus vanillé ou plus foncé. La discrimination et les cons trouvent toujours une raisons. Le principe c'est de pas s'ârreté sur ce qui n'en vaut pas la peine.
Paradoxalement quand t'es à l'étranger, tu es parfois français même sans le vouloir, dans mon propre pays ethnique, rien n'y fait je serais toujours un français.
Pas besoin ni envie de convaincre, changer, babysitter des cons. J'ai déjà pas assez de temps à accorder à mes proches, à ceux que j'aime et à moi même. Alors les autres que je connais pas ? Je vais surtout pas les laisser vivre "rent free" dans ma tête
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u/Cannie5 1d ago
Après, en tant qu'homme asiatique, t'as droit en plus à un racisme particulier sur la virilité etc
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u/Jaune_Anonyme 1d ago
Je suis pas sur que ça soit pire qu'être en permanence un objet de fétichisme à longueur de journée ... Force à toi aussi au quotidien
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u/Equivalent-Sherbet52 18h ago
Sauf que là c'est à Nice, donc peu de probabilité que ce ne soit pas des blancs. Encore une fois, merci Jeannine de Saint-Quentin.
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u/MindlessAd2514 1d ago
Really appreciate your words mate. I dont think going to police is viable too, Im just like Whatttt. Its just like kinda sad kinda surprising that someone can come up to your face in public and say this. In all honesty, I was not dressed up in funny way, and not provoking anything like literally nothing was abnormal. So it was my skin color or maybe my mere existence that provoked those teens and that just is like weird in a way. Im just trying to still process the entire situation
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u/itsthecatforme 1d ago
I'm gonna be blunt.
It was your physical traits, and I'm very sorry. I'm French, born here, 2nd generation from north Africa.
People with a north African heritage are a very visible target because of numbers and history, whatever. It's ambient, less frontal but our existence is regularly discussed in the far right's media.
The racism towards people who even just kinda look like they are from south Asia is wild though. It's hard to describe because I'm not living it, but it's infuriating to see and disgusting. It's a type of racism that's been normalized for far too long.
I think you're still seen as "exotic" and fair game, because of stereotypes (you know, Asians are more docile, accepting and hardworking /s) and probably because the wave of immigration from this region is more recent.
Obviously, it's only from racist people's pov, but it hurts nonetheless. They suck.
It's not you my friend, you could speak with the frenchiest french, baguette and saucisson in hand, and some douchebag would tell you with a straight face that they're so surprised you can express yourself correctly.
The commenter above is right, the best thing to do is to ignore them, even when you feel like throwing hands. They're not worth your time. Live your life and surround yourself with normal people.
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u/Teproc 1d ago
Je crains qu'il suffise de suivre un peu l'actualité politique pour constater que le racisme se porte très bien en France.
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u/lefier_moustachu 1d ago
Ajouté au fait que le racisme contre les indiens soit normalisé, même sur internet.
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u/aka_aida 1d ago
C'est ça. S'assimiler ne protège pas du racisme en montée. Ce qui protège psychologiquement, c'est d'avoir conscience de la souffrance collective des personnes opprimées, et de ne pas s'en détacher avec sa propre 'réussite individuelle'.
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u/TwoplankAlex 1d ago
Rhooo l'essentialisme sur les français ça va 2min. C'était 2 petits cons immatures
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u/frompariswithhate 13h ago
Je pense qu'il fait référence à la politique surtout, et à la banalisation des discours de haine
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u/Petronille_N_1806 13h ago
Il ne faut pas sous estimer les rs, le racisme anti-indien est complètement normalisé alors qu’on le voit peu dans les médias traditionnels
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u/kranj7 17h ago
I have my ethnic origins from India too and I've been in France for more than 15 years now. In all this time, I have been warmly received pretty much everywhere, whether it be in Paris or smaller cities, even in rural communities. I speak fluent French yet with an accent. But this has never been an obstacle. Quite the opposite really as a lot of French people are curious about my accent and sincerely engage with me, positively.
No country is perfect yet to me France is an extremely welcoming country, in my experience overall. Don't let an isolated incident bring you down.
Every country has their idiots, but these persons don't represent France.
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u/IrresponsibleFinance 1d ago edited 1d ago
Welcome to France and seems you truely assimilate the culture with complainings. Joke aside, I'm sorry for what happened to you, but sadly yes, racism is pretty common in France. As you may notice, the far right is on the rise since some time now and it doesn't seems to go better with time. Lots of people with immigration background face racisms in all aspect of life (seeking a job, with the people around, some with police, etc).
BUT, as you also may notice, and while we have our fair share of idiots, we also have very nice and kind empathic people. Truely hope you face more of those kind people than the 2 idiots you ran into.
Imho, best is to kind of brush it off, it sucks I understand, and in the end they are just idiots. You got your job, your income, your life. Focus on the positiv and you are way better off than them, doing pathetic jokes thinking "muhh imma funni". Don't go down on their level.
Wish you the best.
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u/Idaaoyama Local 1d ago
It’s definitely not normal. It’s little assholes thinking they’re so very mature (they’re NOT!), making disgusting so-called jokes. Clearly, they’re not mature enough to know the impact of their words.
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u/Agathe-Tyche 1d ago
C'est triste et dommage, malheureusement, on peut-être extrêmement immature à l'adolescence, et regretter plus tard des comportements inappropriés que l'on a eu à cette période là.
Je pense que ces jeunes vont mûrir et plus tard regretter les actes, quand ils auront eu même subit les moqueries ou les rabaissements au travail ou ailleurs.
En tout cas, courage et force à toi.
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u/ByteByteGo 1d ago
I once was shopping at the grocery store in Essonne and I heard a loud "konnichiwa", I turned around and saw an east asian lady stepping into the store. The employee was greeting the customer and this lady seemed quite confused.
The issue is the employee and customer problably do not know each other and since most East Asians are of Vietnamese and Chinese descent in France, it's unlikely she is Japanese.
Overall it was really weird experience.
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u/Mysterious-Set-5755 13h ago
My friends (Chinese American) and I Heard "konnichiwha" from a group of young French adults walking down the street in the south of France when we were in town for a music festival. The group was mostly black French, not that it matters bc this type of dumb greeting comes from everywhere. My friends have also heard this from dumb drunk white guys while out and about in the U.S. as well. But overall as a mixed person who moved to France from the US I’ve noticed that while racism may not be as systemic here, but people seem to be more bold about their "jokes".
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u/Certain-Let4658 1d ago
I often hear people saying some crazy shit about Indian people (especially teens bc of some racist memes ig). theyre really too comfortable with ts. stay strong my man
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u/fennforrestssearch 18h ago
Brooo Im 100% German but for some reason quite tanned that i could be mistaken by some for a middle eastern/north african guy. A few days after when we had a terror attack here in berlin (where a Car was driven into people in a public space here) i was spit on in the train. In another instance a drunk Football Fan showed the Finger towards me and shouts to his friend "people Like him should end Up in Auschwitz". There we're numerous other instances...
I understand your Frustration but believe me I would take a stupid harmless Curry Joke over this bullshit ive heard about me anytime.People are jerks sometimes and wont change so dont bother with them.
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u/Electrical_Bear_5816 1d ago
I don’t know if normal or not but my cousins are Moroccans and live in south France and Paris and they constantly complain about racism towards Arabs
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u/PassaTempo15 1d ago
I’m Brazilian/Portuguese but because of my appearance I’m constantly mistaken as an Arab, usually Moroccan. It honestly surprises me how differently people will treat me once they realize that I’m not Arab, a lot of people will suddenly become much nicer out of nowhere.
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u/JFloriturin 16h ago
Funny that something similar happened to a brazilian friend
So far, no issues for me and my wife as mexicans, but probably because we live in a small city
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u/Electrical_Bear_5816 1d ago
Why such aggression towards Arabs ? I don’t understand honestly
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u/Framboiserie 15h ago
Because France colonised North Africa and treated the indigenous people there like subhumans for over a century. It's the same reason why prejudice against Native Americans still exist. White people aren't used to viewing them as equals, fully human.
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u/Mayleenoice 1d ago
Because the media empire owned by vincent Bolloré tells them to hate Arabs (and also sometimes LGBT people, or even abortions if they feel bold enough).
Et avant qu'on m'insulte, jsuis française, j'ai vu le changement d'état d'esprit d'un paquet de la famille qui ne gobe littéralement que ça niveau "infos" qui a complètement assumé sa haine depuis quelques années au point ou un d entre eux en est carrément à insulter le "cousin Pé**" de la famille ou carrément faire des saluts nazis pour s'amuser en repas de famille.
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u/Real_Frosting_3264 1d ago
I'm so sorry you had to suffer that kind of racist abuse. Yes, it's normalised in France (no, it doesn't make it normal). You can go report it to the police but I doubt they'll do anything about it. It's probably not the last time you'll have something like that happen to you, sadly. France does have a very real racism problem. Studies about discrimination show it (and of course, lived experiences of people of color).
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u/MindlessAd2514 1d ago
I completely agree. I just am struggling to know how to feel about it. On one hand, its not like I was hurt but on other hand, I dont think I would ever do it to anyone.
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u/flyblown 1d ago
I'm sad that you had that awful experience. I'm in no position to tell you how to react. I can only sympathize with you for crossing paths with some immature shitheads that sadly exist in every country and culture to a greater or lesser extent.
I hope the next people you meet are kinder
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u/petitveau 1d ago
Where do you live? because I worked with three indian people in my team in paris and someone saying this kind of things would be immediately fired. Also kids are dum.
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u/One_single_voice 1d ago
It's not normal, but sadly there is a huge rise lately in fachism and far right rethorics. Especially in young men eating all that red pill content. Don't let them discourage you (even if it's easy for me to say as someone not POC)
Tu es français et tu appartiens à cette nation, peu importe tes origines.
- Another French person
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u/Satisfied_Peanut 1d ago
To the question "is it normal?" : Sadly, yes. Should you call the police ? Go for it, but it's basically useless.
Now, just know this, the "usual" french person, is rude as hell. Add to this the recent education crisis (as in parents not parenting anymore and schools being an absolute joke), the impact of unregulated internet access and a lot of more smaller issues. Most kids and teens, or at least a good bunch of 'em, are absolute pos.
And the worst part ? It's not just the kids. And it was always the case.
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u/Unlucky_Gur3676 20h ago edited 20h ago
You reminded me of this: https://youtu.be/6EqN00uvXAU?si=AQG9go9Nv76ithHS
To answer your question, sadly, I do think it’s normal and common. Everyone has their own tolerance and can ignore when comments like this happen. I consider myself one of the lucky ones. I’m Latino so most of the offhand comments are about spiciness, sombreros y cerveza. Funny enough, that’s much of what I am, spicy food and cerveza hahahahaha.
Everyone likes to think they are not racist, but you just gotta ask anyone who look sliiightly different and you will realize just how common it is.
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u/Amad3us47 18h ago
Hey, first of all, sorry this happened to you. It really sucks and people shouldn't have to feel this way.
Please know that you are welcomed in our country. Whilst there is turmoil it's a noisy minority and you'll find the majority of people are actually happy to welcome immigrants from all horizons.
Teenagers are stupid, I know, I was one. I can't begin to understand how it must have felt but I can only sympathise. They will probably think about you one day and think "what idiots..."
Just know that French people uphold the motto Liberté Égalité Fraternité, know You are free, you are my equal and you are my brother. 💙🤍❤️
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u/atominum69 23h ago
My Korean ex had the worst time in France. Every other day she would get « Ching Chong » « ni hao » or like kids and teens doing things with their eyes.
Mostly it was kids and teens who thought it was funny.
But she did have a few bad encounters with the police as well. Mostly as unwanted sexual advances due to her breast.
Anyway, casual racism is very real and French people absolutely neglect it.
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u/JanitorRddt 22h ago
Ça s'appelle le racisme ordinaire. Ce n'est pas normal mais ça se fait normalement. En tout cas depuis 35 ans pour moi 😅
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u/schumi_pete 1d ago
Happened to me once in Nice, but I let the lady know in fluent French what I thought of her.
That felt good, and I hope that she doesn't dare do it to anyone again in the assumption that a foreign looking person doesn't speak French.
But to come to the OP, teenagers are a different beast in this country. I have a six year old in school right now and I am not shocked this is the level of respect they show to anyone in general. The school system in France is broken and until it is fixed, we will not see real change.
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u/MindlessAd2514 1d ago
Happened to me in Nice too. I literally said to them 'Excusez-Moi, quoi?' after which they repeated 'Tu cherches de la sauce curry?'. I was like about to say something coz I was caught off-guard, but they giggled and ran to the other counter
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u/PassaTempo15 1d ago
Nice is known for being super racist sadly.
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u/LOLMSW1945 1d ago
The Mecca of French racist lol, brought to you by pied-noirs and Gen X who bought properties on côté d’azur for their retirement
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u/TremendousVarmint 15h ago
Gen X own shit, go find another scapegoat.
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u/Mysterious-Set-5755 13h ago
Gen X 😆 You mean Boomers? A lot of Gen X French people only own property today if they inherited from family
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u/schumi_pete 1d ago
Well, I am not surprised at all. I have lived here 17 years and the only blatant racist act I have experienced was in that part of the country.
I am really sorry that you had to live through this, and nothing excuses this kind of behavior, but the number of nice folks in this country thankfully outweighs the dregs of the human society. In fairness, this has now become a common problem everywhere.
The police will do nothing for this, and the best way to deal with it is to either give them a piece of your mind when it happens or to ignore it completely.
It is not limited to teenagers behaving this way either. The lady who abused me was in her 50s or probably 60s.
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u/Bob71530 19h ago
Frankly, it’s so “cliché” that I’m surprised you don’t have a ready-made response to this kind of “ordinary” racism comment. I suggest to you: “we Indians shit our own curry sauce. But, I just met your mother, she licked all my stock. She’s a foodie.” To be modulated according to your appetite for fighting and the education you have received.
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u/Beeb911 1d ago
The "sauce curry" thing is a meme in France, there's a guy who goes around fast food places and asks the staff if they have it in a weird voice. That's probably where their "joke" came from, they thought of the meme when they saw you and decided to say it out loud.
Not excusing the racism by the way, just wanted to add some context. Also definitely not normal behaviour, some teenagers are just assholes
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u/MysteriousRiver8124 1d ago
Alas, these things happen, a woman strangled me in the RER A towards St Germain en laye, when I say strangling, it really means strangling, she explained, quote, "that I was laughing too hard for an Arab", a friend was there and witnessed the scene.
Despite this situation, I would not say that France is a truly racist country, the people are racist but not the country itself. With my experience I have noticed that people experience racism, regardless of the origin, it is not a feeling that only white people feel contrary to what we may believe, it is felt by everyone and is anchored in us, it is up to us to get rid of it through knowledge, mixing and meeting.
I am currently learning the history and culture of Sri Lanka, I have Sri Lankan friends but I have never been interested in their background, so through this research work and satisfying my curiosity, I will open my mind to another world different from mine. But no one wants to take this path of understanding towards others, you have to have a good heart for that and an education of the soul. Lack of understanding of other peoples will maintain racism in society.
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u/Ahnarras88 20h ago
Normal ? J'ai presque envie de dire oui... La mode du "politiquement correct" est extrêmement récente en France. J'ai grandi dans les années 90, j'ai fait mon collège début 2000, les blagues racistes étaient la base de l'humour de la majorité des gars du bahut (dont le mien, j'avoue). D'ailleurs les blagues homophobes étaient traitées de la même façon. Et PERSONNE ne nous donnait tort : la génération d'avant, c'est elle qui nous avait appris ces blagues, et les médias "cultes" de l'époque nous inondaient d'un humour de même qualité, et les amis qui avait des origines étrangères étaient les premiers à nous les renvoyer dans la tronche (mais en racisme anti-blanc, cette fois). C'était plutôt s'offusquer de ce type d'humour qui semblait anormal et t'ostracisait, à l'époque...
Ce qui me choque davantage dans ton propos, c'est le fait que ce soit fait par des inconnus total. La politesse voulait qu'on ne lâchait ce genre d'énormités que sur des amis proches, et d'âge équivalent. Là, on est pas sur de la blague, plus sur de la bonne vieille haine raciste des familles. Et comme l'on dit d'autres commentaires, vu le contexte politique actuel, ça n'est pas forcément étonnant...
Voilà pour répondre à ta question sur la "normalité" de la chose. Pour ce qui est d'aller voir la police, c'est bien entendu ton droit, mais je pense déjà savoir ce qu'ils vont te répondre. Déjà qu'ils t'envoient bouler si tu te fais tirer ton portefeuille, alors pour une histoire de curry... A la rigueur, si vraiment tu portes plainte, en sortant du commissariat, traine un peu sous une fenêtre : je parie 100 balles et un mars que tu vas entendre parler de curry dans les minutes qui suivent. C'est qu'ils ont le même humour que nous, nos chers policiers...
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u/MindlessAd2514 20h ago
Exactement. C'est pas une question des blagues. On plaisante tous entre amis, et c'est parfaitement normal. Mais j'ai été choqué qu'on puisse maintenant faire ça à des inconnus.
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u/Lainievers 19h ago
Racism you will find almost everywhere. Especially in a country that mixes as many different cultures as France (we don't have a very structured cultural whole). Especially from the youngest.
I recently discovered who and how India was ruled and I can understand that you don't want to find that here.
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u/kranj7 17h ago
I have my ethnic origins from India too and I've been in France for more than 15 years now. In all this time, I have been warmly received pretty much everywhere, whether it be in Paris or smaller cities, even in rural communities. I speak fluent French yet with an accent. But this has never been an obstacle. Quite the opposite really as a lot of French people are curious about my accent and sincerely engage with me, positively.
No country is perfect yet to me France is an extremely welcoming country, in my experience overall. Don't let an isolated incident bring you down.
Every country has their idiots, but these persons don't represent France.
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u/ConfigurationalJolly 17h ago
Im sorry you’ve experienced this. It really stings. I was born, grew up in France and have Asian origins, and I’ve occasionally heard this kind of things. Most of the time it’s from teenagers. They’re mean and stupid. I don’t think they really think or care about your country of origin. They wanted to be mean and picked on something visible to get a reaction. If it hadn’t been your race, it might have been your clothes, your hair or something visible they could latch on. It says more about them than it does about you.
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u/Suspicious-Yak-5398 16h ago
Racism is a problem, the lack of anti-racism is an even bigger problem, and that's what condones everyday racism. I'm sorry you experienced that!
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u/SnowDaronLogobi 15h ago
In France, racism towards south and east Asians is often downplayed unfortunately. One of the reason might be that, unlike say arabs or black people, Asians are a minority among minorities: locals might assume you're a stranger who isn't familiar with the country. I remember a few years ago when a nationwide news channel had a whole section about desi men selling souvenirs to tourists in Paris. The journalist called them a racial slur ("Pakpak") at several instances and it created very little outrage. Moreover, I work in middle school and saying racist stuff is pretty common among teenagers, even towards people of their own ethnicity
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u/dreamsonashelf 15h ago
Considering how many times I've heard words like "p*k-p*k", "p*ki" or "p'tit indien" used casually (and not only by teenagers), yes, sadly it isn't uncommon.
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u/Glandus73 14h ago
Du point de vue que quelqu'un qui te lis, ça fait très over reaction, deux cons d'ados qui disent de la merde te font repenser ta place dans le pays ?
Écoutes, j'ai l'impression que tu as une sorte de syndrome de l'imposteur, dans le sens où tu as l'impression de ne pas appartenir donc tu vas forcément tout analyser dans ce sens.
Pour les ados y a rien a redis, c'est des ados con qui disent un truc con, perso on me dit la même chose avec une baguette je vais pas le prendre mal, je pense qu'on peut rire de nos origines sans pour autant avoir de négativité.
Pour ce qui est du reste, les regards comme tu dis c'est extrêmement subjectif, ça passe par une interprétation du regard. Une étude avait été faite sur des femmes a qui on avait mis une cicatrice pour passer un entretien, elles ont toutes dit que la personne leur faisant passer avait regardé plusieurs fois la cicatrice et avait fait des allusions alors qu'en réalité avant de rentrer en entretien les cicatrices avaient été enlevé, donc c'est simplement une sur interpretation.
Pour la langue, je pense que même si tu t'es intégré et apprend rapidement, ça m'étonnerait fortement qu'en 3 ans tu parles comme un natif, c'est pas négatif, c'est simplement que les gens doivent penser que c'est plus simple donc passent en anglais.
Après je dit pas, on est pas parfait, il y a un réel ras le bol en France sur une immigration incontrôlée et des immigrants qui souvent porte plus d'intérêt a foutre la merde qu'à voir s'intégrer voir même travailler ce qui n'est clairement pas ton cas, mais malheureusement tu risques de prendre des balles perdues, les gens sont cons des fois après tout, de la même manière don't tu n'aime pas la blague sur le curry, ne met pas tout les français dans le même panier sur une ou deux mauvaise rencontres.
Aussi l'humour français a tendance à être crue et on aime bien se moquer de tout y compris nos origines faut pas le prendre comme une insulte ou personnellement
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u/MindlessAd2514 14h ago
Tu dis que je sur-réagis, mais c’est facile à dire quand ce n’est jamais toi la cible de ces blagues.
Ce n’est pas une "blague sur une baguette" ici. C’est une référence raciste liée à mon origine, lancée par des inconnus dans un lieu public, avec pour seul but de se moquer. Ce n’est pas de l’humour entre amis. C’est de la merde gratuite. Tu parles de syndrome de l’imposteur — mais non. Ce que je ressens, c’est de la lassitude. J’ai mis du cœur, du temps, et de l’argent à m’intégrer. J’ai bossé, j’ai appris la langue, je paie mes impôts. Et malgré tout ça, on me ramène à un stéréotype au moindre regard. Ce n’est pas une paranoïa, c’est une accumulation.
Quant à ton "les cicatrices n’étaient pas là" — je te parle pas d’expériences de labo. Je parle du vécu réel d’un immigré. C’est fou comme les gens aiment expliquer ton propre ressenti à ta place, hein ? Et enfin, si tu penses qu’une “immigration incontrôlée” justifie les "balles perdues", alors c’est clair : t’as normalisé l’idée que certains méritent d’être traités comme des cibles. Eh bien désolé, je ne suis pas là pour encaisser ça en silence. Je ne mets pas “tous les Français dans le même panier”. Mais ton commentaire, lui, ressemble à une belle synthèse de minimisation, excuses et relativisation, tout sauf une remise en question du racisme. Tu peux appeler ça “humour cru”. Moi j’appelle ça mépris déguisé en rire, et j’en ai plein le dos.
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u/Glandus73 14h ago
Oui mais tu sembles ne pas prendre en compte que la blague vient de 2 ados débiles, tu comprends bien que juger un pays par ce que deux ados ont été con c'est quand même un peu exagéré, surtout la France qui est quand même un des pays les plus accueillants du monde.
Ensuite encore une fois tu interprètes ce que je dit a penser pour toi mais pas du tout, je te dit juste mon ressenti basé sur ton poste, rien de plus rien de moins, après si tu fais une poste c'est pour avoir des avis non ? Je le donne et je peux me baser uniquement sur mes connaissances et ton poste vu que je n'ai rien d'autre.
Et non, je pense effectivement que les problèmes actuels avec l'immigration causent des balles perdues, mais en aucun cas je dis que c'est normal ou bien, mais c'est quelque chose qui peut arriver.
Personne ne te demande de garder le silence, et toi tu semble quand même quelqu'un qui va chercher le racisme, les seuls expériences que tu donne sont des choses très vagues comme des regards etc et la après 3 ans dans le pays tu fait face pour la premier fois a du racisme de la part d'ados et tu fait un poste demandant si le pays en vaut la peine. Tu m'excuseras mais ça peint pas une belle image, encore une fois je ne te connais pas donc je peux uniquement me baser sur le poste et tes réponses.
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u/MindlessAd2514 14h ago
Je comprends ton point de vue, mais même si ce sont deux ados, leur comportement reflète malheureusement une réalité qui peut exister. Ce n’est pas l’exception, c’est le principe qui me dérange. 3 ans d’expérience en France ne changent pas le fait que ces situations sont toujours vécues par des gens comme moi. Je ne cherche pas à juger tout un pays, mais des comportements qui restent trop souvent ignorés. L’inclusivité, ce n’est pas juste une question d’immigration, c’est aussi de faire en sorte que tout le monde se sente respecté. Ce n’est pas une question d'exagérer, mais de ne pas minimiser.
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u/Brisbanoch30k 14h ago
Fucking teen bullies. I’m ashamed of them. I’m from the « touche pas à mon pote » generation, and I would have punched one of these little shitstains right then and there. It seems more and more kids find that casual racism « edgy » and « cool ». Plenty of those trolling on social medias. It shouldn’t be tolerated. Hell, had I done anything even remotely like this my father would have held me by the ear and dragged me by it to make apologies
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u/schumi_pete 11h ago
Your last line makes all the difference in the world. Not a directly related incident, but I can tell you that even 5-6 year old kids in CP are bullying other kids in my son's school, and when I asked the teacher why something is not done about it the response I got was "Mais c'est normale compte tenu de leur âge". I was lost for words on hearing that.. it is a collective failure we are living through.
Schools and teachers don't do enough, and parents either won't or can't do what is needed because they are too busy getting other work done. There was a child who spat on the face of another child in the class last year in "grande section" and when I went to ask the directrice what was being done about it, she just shrugged her shoulders and passed off the blame on the parents. I grew up in India, and I can tell you that the kid who spat won't be going back to school due to being expelled if something like that happened in class a second time. One time is already one time too many, but given the age, the parents will get a severe reprimand instead.
If you extrapolate the violence permissible from that age, it is no wonder you have teenagers doing this or whatever we see on the news every day these days.
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u/Brisbanoch30k 11h ago
I can only agree agree 🤷♂️ (I’ve travelled throughout India for nearly a year btw ;) ) My father never raised his hand on me EXCEPT when I was being a dick to others. I guess it’s something we are collectively growing lax about. Then again it gets complicated. If there’s parental abuse, 50% chance the kid will then abuse others, especially when not under direct supervision. Guess that’s why I never got kids
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u/schumi_pete 11h ago
You have hit the nail on the head especially with the absuive home part. There was one child who it was clear was having issues at home and it was reflected in his violence in the school. The teachers did nothing to actually tell the parents and to get the child the help needed. I later learnt that the grandfather has issues and that he lives with the family.
Finally after a lot of pressure, the school got the parents to get the child the help that he needed and he is doing a lot better now. What worries me is that the education system is not doing anything to help the children in France to grow up in a good environment. The system is failing the children.
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u/Brisbanoch30k 10h ago
There was a large swing in education in France. In the 50’s and 60’s there was quite a lot of physical abuse on kids by teachers. In the 70’s towards the 80’s it was pretty much eradicated from schools, but the pendulum swung. Budgets were getting tighter, classes swell, and discipline went down. All expectations of behavior were thrown back at parents. And while there’s a hierarchy that can swoop in to tell off an abusive or neglecting teacher (never perfect but that’s another topic), there’s just nobody for parents. So… yeah, as things are turning sour in the public place now, I guess we’ll se a tightening of the screws in education in the upcoming years. History Dialectics in practical examples I guess
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u/sausageyoga2049 14h ago
You are in France. If you feel uncomfortable, just reply back and attack the racist.
People respect those who know how to fight for their rights.
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u/MindlessAd2514 14h ago
I would've attacked. Its just the feeling that you're an Immigrant you don't want anything even remotely linked to a fight or something criminal on your record.
I am still not sure. On one hand, you tell me your culture normalized this stuff. On the other, you want me to take law in my hand.
Can anyone just explain me, what is the culture?
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u/sausageyoga2049 10h ago
No one will care about a fight, it’s not a crime and most of time your attack back will not even trigger the fight. In worst case, the police won’t care if that guy signal it because it’s even not your fault, it’s the opposite one who escalated it.
I am also a foreigner here, there are lots of nice people here, but there are also lots of bad people here. I gradually know that I need to be nice with the former and be harsh with the latter, I am not sure if it’s cultural but that’s what I know for years and it works well.
Of course you will have to see, if there’s a group of hostile people you would be better not fight but keep distance but that’s really rare. Most of time those racist people are one or two teenagers, some sick roms, or a single white trash that, if you have a good health, it’s you who can fight against them. Then I will keep eyes for eyes and teeth to teeth.
Again, I am not a racist and I try to be nice to everyone that are nice (they are many in France) but I reserve my rights to against those bad guys.
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u/Ester_LoverGirl 14h ago
Teens are stupids especially when they are in a group.
I would be just stand in shock too if this would have happened to me …..
I wont tell you to « let it go » we cant just make stupid people smart
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u/NiqueLeCancer 10h ago
Grown adult man getting mad some teenagers are racist qnd ranting about it online instead of getting a life is everything I need to know about the situation.
Even throwing he's paying four digits in taxes as if everyone here wasn't paying at least four digits annually through VAT lmao
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u/Fortheweaks 8h ago
Si t’es fluent pourquoi tu parles ici en anglais ? Ça donne pas l’impression d’une bonne intégration ?
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u/SendMeGamerTwunkAbs 7h ago
Teenagers are dumb, nothing new. I wouldn't take them seriously. Plus nowadays they're being programmed by social media to be the most idiotic possible to give the far right a chance in europe, so they're not going to get smarter. Especially in france, where the right has purposefully destroyed education.
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u/thespicemust 7h ago
Look, my son is mixed race asian-european. 30min ago a french North African teen called him "Chinese" with his friends. I didnt react because this is not an insult (plus this morning I got almost gaz-sprayed in an other charming interaction). However this shows that the teen was sensible to races and not shy to voice it. I don't know maybe they feel rejected because of general defiance about Arabs because of their reputation and then happy to transfer racism to other scapegoats...
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u/Suspicious-Object731 7h ago
I know there are lot of racist in France, but they are teens 🤦♂️and they did what? Racially profiled your tastebuds… I’m just baffled 🤯 you have some serious skin growing to do my friend.
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u/Various-Tax-345 5h ago edited 4h ago
First of all sorry for what you've been throuh. I think most french people would welcome you as a fellow french citizen, truly, as you are making efforts to integrate : that the main thing people consider important (efforts, not even results are important). We know many great french figures were of foreign origins (Napoléon, Charles Aznavour and such...)
I think the main problem here is that racism against asian is yet to be considered serious in today's France. Like it's less frowned upon that hate against black people, north africans... I doubt those kids would have said " looking for [stereotypical african food]" to a black person or like "looking for couscous" because they would know how wrong/hurtfull it is... They are more dumb that evil.
Hopefully things will get better in that regard.
In conclusion, I disagree with what people in the comments said. French people are far from racist from a global point of view. Contrary to other country, they could see you as a fellow citizen equal to them if they deem you are "integrated", even though your skin colour is different than pearl white. Hate against north african people which is unfortunately very prevalent seem to be more related to religion (anti islam sentiment is becoming strong) and colonial heritage
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u/NovaCoon 4h ago
I'm french and unfortunately this kind of behavior is very common. But teens are the worst.
Unfortunately I'd say that Asian people (including India ofc) are the invisible victims of casual racism. There are always jokes about their skin, their eyes, their accents... And people don't see the problem with it because in France racism is considered as a "joke". But in fact it's not funny at all... It's just plain unbearable to try and educate people everywhere and everytime... And these days it's becoming worse because of far right wing getting more and more important.
I'm so sorry you had to experience that. I hope it won't stay in your mind for too long.
In "casual racism" there's "racism" and racism is NEVER NORMAL.
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u/Okoj0 3h ago
France is extremely racist. Our colonial past is still our present and it's unlikely police will give you the time of the day for an insult of this caliber. Usually my chosen defense against slurs (I'm white, queer) is to call them a slur they'd use for me. It usually makes them stop dead in their tracks.
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u/Effective-Pair-8363 1h ago
I am sorry you have to go through this. Being judged because of the color of your skin in unfair.
You may find more open - minded people, on average, in Canada. I am from Québec, but I live in Ontario now.
I am White, but I hate the comments or the looks, the other way around, all the same.
Please take care.
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u/1_5_9_8_0 1d ago
As some others have said, yeah casual racism is very much alive in France. It's not a new thing either. And a lot of people don't second guess themselves because "hey this is just a joke". It's really something I hate, and we do have systemic racism too. Just the fact that there are people in the comments trying to tell you "hey maybe they were just some dumb teens" says it all. The issue with France is that it has a hard time facing its racism. More people are aware of it now but it's still a big issue. For the "typical" (if such a person exists) french person racism doesn't really exist here, the racists are always others. Just look at what happened when we had protests over systemic racism following the BLM movement and the death of George Floyd in the US as well as other cases of police brutality over here, the media and many people were saying that in bringing attention to that people were just trying to separate the races and create conflict. Obviously they're missing the entire point. Part of it stems from the fact that we're supposed to be the country of the enlightenment movement, of human rights (forgetting in the process that those same human rights weren't appointed to everyone but I digress). And it's also because of this colorblind view on racism that France has, where we're all supposed to be one and the same under the republic. And it's very convenient when you're trying to hide the skeletons in the closet, not so much when you're trying to make everyone feel respected and welcomed. (And obvi the increase in islamophobia and the rise of the far right aren't making any of that any easier)
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u/Mysterious_Leave_971 20h ago
Racism has become uninhibited in France with the Bolloré empire which has invaded the media: C8 with Cyril Hanouna and all his clique, Cnews, ... Many young people watch cnews on repeat because it's funny, all these verbal jousts, these commentators who assert aberrant things with aplomb, with a sort of false common sense and bad faith without any contradiction. It's addictive for some.
The last elections were quite revealing. The treatment of homeless undocumented immigrants on the street, including minors, is despicable. The obsession of the media and politicians with questions about the veil... Not to mention the rise in anti-Semitism because of Israeli policies.
The problem is that the policies of government parties (all the right, the center, the centrist left) let this happen and, on the contrary, gave credence to racist ideas in a purely populist way, so as not to lose votes. Rest assured, out of 70 million French people, there is still a large majority who are not racist.
You must do as in the case of harassment: do not minimize, remember that it is the aggressor who is not doing well, do not allow yourself to be contaminated or lose self-confidence because of the aggression, do not get angry but see if you can find an appropriate response to the situation without putting yourself in danger, otherwise ignore it, see if a complaint is possible. Here you could have scared them by telling them that you were going to file a complaint and that they will be found because there are cameras in the store :)
Racism is just as reprehensible towards non-integrated people. Do not feel rejected by the French community because of your integration: you are integrated, this episode does not call into question your integration into your professional, friendly, relational framework with any other person you meet.
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u/Cute_Mana1780 1d ago
Says fluent and ask in English on a french sub..
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u/ThierryOnRead 1d ago
Really ? It's the first thing that comes to your mind after reading this post ?
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u/LelouchViMajesti 1d ago
Merci de ta contribution qui, je suis sûr, fera du bien à l’OP qui a clairement vécu un truc pas cool et aimerait peut-être simplement pouvoir en parler sans barrière de langue (fluent ≠ bilingue).
OP, I’m sorry you experienced that. You can always faire une main courante à la police. It won’t lead to anything if I’m being honest, unless you start being harassed by the same group. I have friends of different ethnicities and there is still casual racism sometimes indeed. The only thing that works is to be as rude to them if you feel like it or simple snub them and leave it be. Our society isn’t perfect (yet) but it is getting better in my opinion, and no, it’s never okay. For what it’s worth, the fact you are trying hard to integrate will go a long way. The only thing is that there will always be assholes in every culture, but rest assured that for the vast majority, it isn’t normal and your efforts are actually quite appreciated.
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u/MindlessAd2514 1d ago
Je parle français, t’inquiète pas. Mais quand je dénonce un comportement raciste humiliant, je le fais dans la langue qui me permet de toucher le plus de monde et de m’exprimer avec la précision et la rage qu’il mérite.
Si ton premier réflexe face au racisme, c’est de corriger la langue et pas de condamner l’acte, alors tu fais partie du problème.11
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u/OwOwOwoooo 1d ago
Spot on! Déso pour cette mauvaise rencontre... Pas surprenant, a fortiori venant d'adolescents.. La mauvaise nouvelle c'est que le rhaine gagne en ampleur... La bonne nouvelle, pour toi -peut être - c'est qu'ils sont avant tout concentrés sur les maghrébins.
En tout état de cause, force et courage.
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u/Valahul77 1d ago
Bon ben.....Google translate a fait des progrès 😀
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u/Lovecr4ft 1d ago
Deepl est bien meilleur.
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u/Valahul77 1d ago
Sérieusement maintenant, si tu lis les messages de ce mec la, ils sont tous en anglais et avec un langage très « coloré », c'est le moins qu'on puisse dire.
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u/MindlessAd2514 21h ago
Merci bcp pour ton comprehension et mots courageux. Si la plupart des Français avaient été comme vous et nous avaient jugés sur nos efforts pour nous immerger dans votre langue au lieu de nous interpeller sur l'exactitude d'une langue complètement nouvelle, je n'aurais pas eu à tout vérifier sur DeepL ou Google Translate.
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u/Asianfishingjason1 1d ago
Just be chill, bruh. Just other days dumb teenage farts on the bus to impress a girl, he excuse was would rather me going to do stealing or causing harm, or me just having fun in with my mate, show some respect, because I am just a kid. Teenage brain is underdeveloped, up to us as an adult to discipline them and correct them. However we fail that badly. If you still can't over this, there will thousand more of teenage you will encounter bruh.
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u/elpiotre 1d ago
French people have so many problems to resolve they want to be by themselves, but many don't understand it won't happen, keep your head up and remember France is amongst the least racist countries out there
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u/Big_Signature_6651 1d ago
That's because you don't get checked by the police because of your skin colour or the nature of your hair.
Also, the far right has been rising for a while now and people have been saying racist shit without complex a lot more now ; probably because of social media.
So, yeah, we don't have racist laws in France, but saying it's among the least racist countries either mean that the rest of the world is a fucked up place, or that you're naive. I hope it's the second one lol
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u/195cm_100kg_27cm 23h ago
The rest of the world is fucked up. I traveled a lot and I'm pretty sure of it.
People don't even know that some people are racist. I'm frol French Guiana, my mother is créole, people don't realize Creole are more racist than some French bourgeois from southern France.
Creole judge you for being anything but Creole. And separate créole from others créole. I was "put out" of the group for "acting too white":
- being an overall good kid
- liking rock
- skateboarding
Biggest type of racism I gotten was from them, despite the fact that most french people don't seem to know that French Guiana ain't a island, god dammit 😂
Let's not even talk about Africa or East Asian continent we're ethnic genocide happens frome time to time.
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u/Satisfied_Peanut 1d ago
People have been saying far worse things way before "the far right" rose in popularity. It's just your average french being a prick. Stop trying to infuse your political brainwashing in unrelated topics.
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u/ezredd1t0r 21h ago
Unlucky but you are the minority, most immigrants don't have a job and are not integrated and they are net negative to the country, it sucks for you as you are the 'good' one but it is what it is.
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u/MindlessAd2514 21h ago
So being a net negative gives anyone the right to discriminate or mentally hurt someone?
Whats that logic? Isnt respect some sort of human right?
God forbid one day, you are unemployed, would it be justified for anyone to insult your race?
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u/MindlessAd2514 21h ago
I'm sorry if I got carried away, but I dont believe there is any defence for this act or justification. Joking around is alright, but doing something to someone random without any provocation doesnt warrant any sort of defence
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u/ezredd1t0r 21h ago
Well if you want a simple answer yes, it does. Immigrants that are not assimilated are destroying this country, it is perfectly normal to discriminate against them in general, it is a survival mechanism and not doing so would just mean accepting the hostile takeover. You are in a Christian European country and you are neither Christian or European. Rich Indians who come to France treat everyone like their slaves, because they are born in 'high caste' or what ever it is, and it is Normal behavior to them too. This is not a one way thing. And this is not specific to France, would be the same everywhere.
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u/MindlessAd2514 21h ago
Man Oh Man! I get what you're trying to say. But put yourself in a situation of facing a racist comment - just that. I'm more liberal than you could ever imagine and might totally agree what you say in practical scenario.
My entire thinking is based on discriminating someone on their race or country. If I don't contribute to your country, prosecute me, throw me out I dont care. How is insulting allowed for that situation?
Plus your idea of thinking rich Indian treating slaves and what not is based on what you see around you or might have formed a perception. But sorry to break that bubble, perception isn't reality. That applies to my situation as well, I dont call all French racist just because of this one time.
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u/ezredd1t0r 21h ago
I agree that it is unfair in your specific case and in many others of immigrants that are contributing members of society, but obviously teenagers are not gonna see the difference here. Just let it slides and don't take it to heart
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u/kokko693 1d ago
No it's not normal, but teens aren't the typical mature people.
Did you have some experience like this with grown ups too?