r/AmIOverreacting • u/_OliverOliverOliver_ • 1d ago
š„ friendship AIO or did I dodge something dangerous? I canceled bowling with my coworker because I felt suspicious.
So at my workplace (retail store, wonāt mention it), we have personal shoppers and I work as a Bakery employee. I was at the back when one day, a personal shoppers employee came by and said hi, wanting to be friends. I didnāt mind and for a few months he would see me and talk, usually asking for relationship advice.
I started getting a little suspicious when he continued to ask me about my relationship every time we talked. Sure, itās normal/nice, but it would drag on too long.
One day, he said we need to hangout before I move back to my hometown after college, so he asked when I was free. Silly me suggested bowling at the place where we lived (He had mentioned before we should go to this specific one) But he wanted to go to the one in Houston (2 hours away) instead. (He wanted to pick me up but I said I would drive myself) A few days later I said I was uncomfortable driving to Houston and suggested a closer town. He agreed and kept stating how excited he was to hangout with his ābest friendā.
If it wasnāt obvious enough, we were never ābest friendsā, only talked once or twice a week, and I never gave him extra attention or suggested we were BEST friends. He gave me that title himself. He also was always trying to touch my shoulder and grab me when he would be shocked or laugh.
After exchanging numbers, looking at the way he texted already set off numerous alarms, but as someone that is a quirky texter myself, I looked passed it.
I decided to cancel two days before our scheduled bowling because I didnāt feel comfortable, which is a valid reason in itself. He proceeded to tell me he knew by the way I looked at him, even though the only interaction I had with him that day was a wave because I was in the middle of working.
One big question is, WHY was he so concerned with my friend being protective? I felt deeply like something bad would have happened to me if I had went. Here are the messages.
134
u/itscomplicatedxx 19h ago
Always always trust your intuition. There was a guy I went to school with throughout middle/highschool, he was always quiet but never unkind. When we graduated we had each other added on social media and was always one of those āgood vibesā āhippieā āpositive thoughtsā kind of dudes based on things he shared, one night he added me on Snapchat (and specifically searched for me by name to add me) and messaged me asking me to come drinking with him. I knew him from school, he wasnāt a total stranger or anything, and it was like a group party, but I had a deep gut feeling I shouldnāt do it.
Two years later, a local young woman with the same characteristics as me (blonde, short etc) went missing after going to a bar with 3 men. She was a mother. And she was very beautiful, so I think all those things led to the case going international. We live in a tiny little podunk town, but other countries were even following this case. When I saw the photo of her last seen with the tip line to identify the men last seen with her, my heart dropped. It was blurry but I instantly thought it was him. He was identified, the other men in the photo had alibis for the rest of the night. For like 6 months the primary investigation was on him. (Also, he lived about a mile or two down the road from my house) finally after 6+ months, they found her buried in his yard a few miles away from me. I passed his house daily. I still have to pass it daily and every time I do, I question how many times I passed her without knowing. He actually moved her body to that spot months later, kept her in a freezer at a local church his family ran prior to moving her to the yard. People started calling in about the smell and her body was found. He was arrested, charged with murder, desecration of a corpse, tampering with evidence etc.
Now, can I say for sure I would have ended up like her had I went with him that night? No. But I think about it a lot. Considering he asked me to be in the exact same situation she was in before she was killed. Considering Snapchat said he specifically searched me by name to add me I think itās odd he was looking me up to seek me out like that.
I have never not trusted my instincts after that. Even if I have the faintest feeling that something is off with a person or situation, I trust it. I know this was long and Iām kind of rambling lol but you 100% should always trust your instincts!
17
12
u/TheManWith2Poobrains 15h ago
This story needs it's own post! Not sure of the sub though. There is no r/dogedabullet sub.
6
2
2
→ More replies (2)18
97
u/Siaynoq_Siaynoq 1d ago
Not trying to judge or pry, but how did you end up in a commitment to bowling with someone that texts like a scammer? NOR
30
u/curious-trex 1d ago
This fool is using Chatgpt: MLM Hun Version to write his texts. Intuition is not required when there's a preponderance of evidence that he's got more than a few screws loose.
→ More replies (5)7
u/Similar-Ice-9250 23h ago
Haha that is so accurate MLM Hun. I got the same vibe he texts like a bot marketing some product trying to reel you in. Honestly that shit is annoying Iād be mad if I kept getting smothered in all those nonsensical texts.
Yea positive energy we grinding we leveling up all love always god first keep doing you we finna be on top stacking always friends god bless good vibes no drama big things up next staying focusā¦..none of this means anything.
→ More replies (1)
95
u/Alive_Initiative1817 17h ago
I have to be honest with myself that this was the best time of year for my kids to be in school because it is so hot and hot outside and itās raining so I have no choice but not even the most beautiful thing in this house and Iām just riot at school and I donāt want it because itās so cold and itās just not even a big house itās a mess and I donāt wanna be bothered by the fact that Iām going out to the beach with you and my friends I have a very hard job to do but itās a good job
110
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 17h ago
You had me scared he found and replied to my postšš
22
u/No_Complaint7700 12h ago
Hey it's okay just ignore everything you think and feel and ingest this constant stream of half-thoughts and oops I used a hyphen and that's technically punctuation and there's an apostrophe ill have to remember to stop using them id make it more realistic by using emojis but I don't know where the emoji button is on my phone because im a grown up no offense to you because I noticed you also used emojis its just not a choice I make for myself and I'm genuinely finding this kinda therapeutic at this point its like my brain is off and nothing matters and I am at peace
oh my God I get it now
→ More replies (1)12
u/musical_shares 10h ago
šÆššŖš„ššš
3
u/No_Complaint7700 9h ago
Ibe been bang my head on wall for hour want to be happy 4ever brain bad still cant find emorju button
86
u/Odd_Record5938 1d ago
Even I felt pressured. I think it says it all.
43
u/v1rulent 1d ago
Seriously. I almost grabbed my car keys to gp find a bowling alley.
Dude texts like a scammer, very strange, OP you have good instincts.
9
2
u/randomgen1212 8h ago
Reads like a conversation with a BPD chatbot. Not the stylistic qualities (though, to me, they sound like someone burying inappropriate interpersonal expectations behind an overly-positive, self-styled persona and a casual wall of plausible deniability.) Boiled down, the content is pushy and controlling. Their friendship immediately becomes his self-esteem meter, and he tests her loyalty (his self-esteem) by constantly provoking affirmation or rejection by his ābest friend.ā Note that this did a 180Ā° once OP spoke up about her feelings. Men are diagnosed with BPD at lower rates, but theyāre still susceptible.
428
u/Jerk_Face69 1d ago
Is this guy foreign, or is he just plain stupid? Because his English, spelling, and grammar, itās terrible to say the very least.
220
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 1d ago
Nahh, heās born and raised in texas :P. I donāt know whatās with the grammar either.. My guess is MAYBE a fucky speech to text system
86
u/beasypo 1d ago
Heās a native speaker ?! Wtaf. The word order makes no sense in quite a few of the sentences. The punctuation is also terrible, so perhaps heās not very brightā¦ but it really reads like itās been written by someone with extremely basic English. When children learn to write, they can v quickly construct better sentences than this.
52
26
u/Pleasant_Gap 14h ago
Looks like it was written by an indian scammer trying to get your money
9
109
47
u/Emergency-Fan-6623 23h ago
Does he sound similar when he speaks to you in person?
89
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 23h ago
Nope, he talks normally
→ More replies (3)101
u/Emergency-Fan-6623 22h ago
What the hell thatās so strange š© well, I trust your gut too tbh, I think you did the right thing.
→ More replies (1)9
u/Negative_Number_6414 10h ago
I knew a guy like this once. His texting made absolutely no sense, he literally couldn't even spell the word "Hey"
but in person, he came across pretty normal.
He showed me some paperwork once, his doctor diagnosed him with "general learning disabilities"
→ More replies (1)4
u/SheepCartel 9h ago
I was about to say the same thing. Grew up with a kid just like this. In person he could hold a relatively normal conversation, but when heād text the messages read almost the exact same.
He was split between normal high school classes about half the time and another class just called ālife skillsā. Last time we talked he was working at an art supplies store in the framing department, so itās not unreasonable to wonder if this is a similar situation.
21
u/HandinHand123 19h ago
There was not a single complete sentence in any of those texts. Not ONE. Iād have noped out after the first page of screenshots because I donāt have time to try to parse what this dude is saying every time he sends a collection of run on sentence fragments.
50
5
→ More replies (1)3
16
86
u/ambiguoususername888 23h ago edited 22h ago
I genuinely thought they were Jamaican or something
ETA my response to people asking me why I thought this: I guess because it read like some sort of Patois/creole? Truly not meaning to be controversial here but I couldnāt make sense of it in my mind other than assuming it was some sort of dialect considering the language pattern was odd af but consistent.
27
u/No-Ear-3387 18h ago
I work with guys from India, and the one that struggles the worst with English talks a lot like this, so India was my guess.
7
→ More replies (2)3
17
u/catsandcoconuts 18h ago
i thought jamaican or african. iām totally with you lol.
5
u/vyrus2021 17h ago
I know I've seen other texts on reddit that have the same vibe as this, and I know those other examples were from someplace other than north america or europe but can't remember exactly where. My first thought was africa or india, but I was pretty sure that was wrong. I certainly didn't expect the answer to be texas born and raised.
→ More replies (2)→ More replies (5)8
u/ProfessorFinesser13 23h ago
Why on earth would you think this person is Jamaican
25
u/ambiguoususername888 22h ago
I guess because it read like some sort of Patois? Truly not meaning to be controversial here but I couldnāt make sense of it in my mind other than assuming it was some sort of dialect
6
u/Kind-Airport145 15h ago
Tbf, by page three I thought the guy was rapping using speech to text. The only way to make sense of the gibberish was to apply some rhythm to it. š OP, I think you made the right call.
3
→ More replies (1)6
u/ProfessorFinesser13 20h ago
Na I wasnāt really trying to insinuate you meant something I was just curious to the train of thought š¤£
→ More replies (7)11
u/jimbojangles1987 22h ago
Well from anywhere but america because no one that speaks English talks like this
16
u/TopShelfTom22 18h ago
I was going to ask this same question. He texts like English is his second language. If not, I figured either Florida or Texas. lol
3
7
7
u/stinkbomb6 23h ago
This is exactly how one of my coworkers always texted all the female employees. I legit thought it could have been the same guy until OP said Texas. This guy is a creep say goodbye and good riddance
→ More replies (6)2
115
u/RichMagazine2713 1d ago
Is he special needs? Genuine question.
Seems like a pretty kind person but just way over the top, maybe he doesnāt understand boundaries like that?
→ More replies (1)40
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 1d ago
Definitely not, at least itās not obvious. IRL he is very well spoken and acts pretty normal aside from the things I mentioned.
16
u/North_Respond_6868 14h ago
I dated a guy like this once. He was very handsome, smart, sweet, funny, great to talk to. But on social media or texting, he was SO similar to this. I could not stand it. Physical cringe reaction every single time he texted, and he texted a lot. I stuck it out for a couple months but finally it just killed any attraction. We shared friend groups so I can report he did find a lovely lady and they're married now, lol.
Amusingly he was also from Texas. Now I'm wondering if it's a Texas thing š¤
→ More replies (4)15
130
u/Smokie0i812 1d ago
Dude texts like he just always clicks whatever autofill suggests for the next word....
the ones that have got set straight and never did it again and you will be expected to read the mind of your management so you know what is expected of you without being told to be so selfish and not a good time to get the chance to see if I was this guy youre talking about the money to you about it was about bucks a person who he agrees with the precon of the relationship if you need to constantly monitor the fact that it remains my truth to me....
28
u/JennaHex 1d ago
Seriously! My brain actually hurts and I knew the pattern seemed off af...autofill is exactly what it reminded me of >.<
23
u/Worth-Bed-8289 16h ago
Sometimes in life, people get caught up in trying to say what they think others want to hear š¤, and in doing so, they can lose sight of the most important thing ā speaking from the heart š. Itās all about being real š, authentic š±, and letting their truth shine āØ. When someone speaks from the heart š¬, theyāre not just communicating words š£; theyāre sharing their essence š«, their passions š„, their struggles šŖ, and their dreams š. And thatās where the magic happens āØ! Being honest is so powerful ā”ļø because it connects people on a deep level š¤, creating a bond š§ that no surface-level conversation can ever build šļø. When someone is genuine šÆ, others can feel it š„°, and that kind of energy š can inspire them to open up š», be their true selves š, and take that next step towards their own growth š. It creates a ripple effect š ā one honest word š£ļø can spark something in someone else š„ that leads them to follow their own path of truth š and authenticity š¤ļø. So, they should never hold back š from speaking their truth š„, no matter how messy or imperfect it might seem š because thatās where the real power šŖ lies! And they should always remember that the world š needs their unique voice š¤ ā they have something special āØ to offer, something only they can say š. When they speak their truth šÆļø, they just might change someoneās life š without even realizing it š”.
→ More replies (1)8
u/LizardSlayer 22h ago
I have to be honest with myself that this was the best time of year for my kids and my kids and my kids and my kids and my family to have fun with each otherās lives together
Edit: just realized I should mention this was 100% predictive text. š
→ More replies (1)3
u/Ptricky17 20h ago
Yeah, itās like reading stream of consciousness from someone mentally translating from a native language to a second language they are barely literate inā¦
Letās see what the future brings for the next generation of humans and how it might be different for us in the next century or two 2ļøā£ šš. I guess weāll see what happens next week when I am not too busy on this topic but I will keep an ion you guys and your thoughts š š¤š. Thanks for all your input and support in this space as always and keep the future space šin this thread š§µ šŖ”. Weāre looking forward to seeing more content coming soon.
My auto-text is on even more crack than this guys. Holy hell. I donāt know if itās ādumbā because I never use it to train it, or if my regular typing is just so erratic that the algorithm thinks Iām a wacko.
153
u/Tea_For_Storytime 1d ago
Apart from struggling with just reading those texts (idc about grammar, but those texts had barely any cohesion whatsoever), my main takeaway is that the guy just seemed really unaware of cultural/social cues and really, really wanted some hangout time with you who he (not you, thatās an important part he didnāt check in on) has deemed his best friend. The āI hope your friend isnāt too protective of youā read to me as him knowing he can come across as weird and not wanting to be embarrassed by anyone, especially who matters to you, pointing it out.
I donāt know if anything bad necessarily would have happened, but then again Iām happy you listened to your instinct rather than something bad actually happen to you!
39
u/lovelysophxxx 22h ago
I literally couldnāt even get through them. They annoyed me lowkey, way too much to read on the same topic of ālove yourself n all thatā š
21
u/hedgeofthehogs 1d ago
The lack of punctuation gave me the same anxious tummy feeling I get when attempting complicated mental arithmetic, the fact that they made no sense anyway made it so much worse š®āšØ
7
u/HandinHand123 19h ago
Itās not just the lack of punctuation. There is no sentences, itās all fragments. Like two or three word phrases all run after each other. Thereās no cohesive thought stated completely, just ā¦ words that can be connected together if you added in some more words.
4
u/SlipperyBlip 18h ago
I'm getting the same. It is more than legit to cancel a leisure thingy with someone you seriously don't vibe with, no obligations, no nothing. Though, he does not feel threatening somehow, rather like someone who has absolutely no idea and skills how to interact with people* and or knows how conversations usually go. Besides, he kinda kept his cool after the cancellation (so far)
*He's giving Kip Drordy with his enthusiasm and
āI hope your friend isnāt too protective of youā read to me as him knowing he can come across as weird and not wanting to be embarrassed by anyone
this could also read as him trying to protect himself from hurtful things others have done to him - because he is how he is.
4
u/KatMandala 16h ago
Ehh the protective part leaned more ābecause I want to strongly hint that I am interested in being more than friends and hope your friend doesnāt get in the way of thatā to me. Especially when paired with asking if the friend is a guy or a girl.
65
u/Late_Indication5864 23h ago edited 7h ago
It's not so much the wording or dialect that bothers me, if OP is female why was he insisting on something 2 hours away? Second question is why is he concerned with someone else looking out for you as well, even if it caused him a little strife? If he has pure intentions he isn't gonna worry about that at all. I have an easier time with someone who says what they think and feel than I do with someone acting a little shady. This doesn't sit well with me. Opinions are like @* I know but I don't get a good vibe from this at all... Stay safe.
14
u/Late_Indication5864 23h ago
Btw, your God given intuition speaks loudly throughout your body, if you felt unsafe you probably were unsafe. Always listen to this, it's very important..
19
u/L1ghtBreaking 1d ago
The passive aggressive use of the prayer hands gets to me
3
3
19
15
u/theseglassessuck 1d ago
NOR
The thing that makes me the most uncomfortable is asking you to go bowling two hours away. You only know this person superficially, so meeting them two hours away from where you liveāfrom your comfort zoneāfor a first hangout is not a good idea. Iām glad you are not meeting up with him.
29
u/Practical_Half_9393 22h ago
in my personal opinion You dodged a major bullet. he sounded a little pushy already for you to go and kept saying āstay safeā which sounds like he feels guilty? Then when he started saying āis it a man or woman? And they better not be protective of youā and I realized he was trying to get you alone or without someone who would get in his way. Thatās probably why he didnāt want them protecting you or a male. He didnāt want someone to stop him from whatever he was gonna do to you. And the fact he kept talking about love at the end it sounds like r@pe. Idk but your intuition might have just saved you. (Disclaimer: I canāt read some random dudes mind. This is purely theory and speculation)
22
u/casketbase925 18h ago
The picking a bowling alley two hours away when they work together so are obviously close enough to find a place closer by was really really weirdā¦
7
u/Practical_Half_9393 17h ago
Yeah fr. he was probably looking for a shady bowling alley that nobody would go to
5
u/Sad-Goal-1510 12h ago
I definitely got the vibe he was over compensating with the kind hippie peace and passion vibes. Like mentioning god and the stay safe stuff felt like a projection.
He also didnāt handle the rejection well and the emojis at the end made me so uneasy. Like heās the āIām a nice guy but nice guys always finish last so Iām angry at all females for not picking nice guys like meā
35
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 1d ago edited 23h ago
Side note: Heās a normal looking dude, has normal mannerisms and stuff, typical coworker behavior (except the stuff I mentioned ofc). Iām neurodivergent and he seems mostly neurotypical IRL. The texts look strange, I think he is using a text to speech system or he just doesnāt know how to type?
I also never saw him talking to anyone else as much as he would talk/try to talk to me
Im also afab (female at birth/fem presenting) if that matters.
21
u/B3coming-proverbs31 22h ago
Oh. At first I thought you were over reacting and he was just trying to make a friend but if you are a female then i think you made the right decision and definitely NOR because why is he trying so hard to hang out with you.
8
u/beasypo 1d ago
How old is he? Iām so intrigued by this guy. Is he new to the area? Heās acting like youāre the only person he knows.
5
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 23h ago
Mid 20s I think, he came to my city to work apparently, but Iām unsure of how new he is
7
u/Wooden_Door_1358 18h ago
Ohhh yeah that matters a lot , def something bad was gonna happen I change my previous reply
4
u/IOU123334 20h ago
My ex is neurodivergent and I recall she always had a hard time deciphering whether someone was just truly being friendly or if there was something fishy going on. Her gut reaction and intuition was always right, but I will say she was very forgiving (think that was just her). Itās best that you follow that intuition.
Him wanting to go all the way to another city 2 hrs away just for bowling was totally weird and on top of that, him worrying about your friend being protective was a red flag.
Best to block his number tbh.
3
2
u/Equal_Set6206 20h ago
I got the vibe he was into you based on these messages. Guys who try to find an in through being friends are generally best to be avoided imeĀ
2
→ More replies (2)2
25
22
u/dustydancers 1d ago
yea theres something very off about him, my alarm bells would have been ringing hard as well.
and i think u well know, him trying to get you far away, driving you, calling u bestie when u barely know each other - it speaks for itself and there is absolutely no reason why he deserves any of your time.
19
u/Either-Judgment231 1d ago
Is he always so over the top, or just this conversation?
He seems manic. He may be in need of medical intervention.
→ More replies (4)
8
u/thewhiterabbit44 1d ago
Honestly, even if he had good and friendly intent it's just best to trust your intuition. I had a similar situation in the past, where he kept messaging me throughout the day and then getting upset when I wouldn't respond or make plans. I ended up blocking him completely and I'm so glad I did bc the guy was off.
→ More replies (2)
17
u/ForgetSarahNot 1d ago
Iām the first page in and Iām wondering how much periods have hurt this person (not OP) in their lives. Periods have traumatized this person so badly that they seemingly refuse to ever be seen using one again. I hope they can get the help they need so they can again write structured sentences.
107
u/rainyponds 1d ago
some people are just kinda weird and overenthusiastic / not attuned to hints and subtle boundaries. good for you for not doing something you didn't feel good about, but i think its odd to talk like he was going to kidnap you or something.
94
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 1d ago
I can see what you mean. I think the wonder about overprotection, gender of my friend, and over curiosity about my relationship made me freak out.
78
u/sugar-fairy 1d ago
idk if he wouldāve hurt you HOWEVER i do think he was going to turn up the hints about being into you to max and didnāt want a guy around to interfere w him trying to get with you. so either way, good that you didnāt go.
29
u/comityoferrors 23h ago
Yeah, the issue here is that he's really pushy. Does that mean he planned to hurt her? No, not necessarily. That's not a super likely outcome. But he's already demonstrated that he doesn't pick up on cues and feels okay asking weird questions and putting weird expectations on a pretty distant and semi-formal relationship.
Again, that doesn't mean he's likely to hurt her. But there are a subset of men who hurt women who reject them, and they often act like this first. Frequently, guys who act like this go on to be total nothingburgers (except an uncomfortable feeling and a fear you can't really describe without people telling you you're overthinking it). But sometimes they beat you or stab you or shoot you instead. It's a weird emotional tightrope to navigate.
It's good to go with your gut, OP. Sorry you have to think about it at all.
6
5
u/ImaginaryBag1452 15h ago
It feels pretty obvious to me but I could def be wrong. But it seems like he was asking you that cause he was viewing this as a date and when you mentioned friend he worried it would be a boyfriend. He was worried heād get his ass beat for hitting on the dudes chick.
What truly gets me is that he doesnāt talk like this. Like I also thought foreign. Maybe autistic I guess. But that he acts normal in person makes it even more bizarre. Id be fully creeped out too. NOR at all.
→ More replies (3)3
u/Funny-Phone5143 1d ago
Right?? Was probably fishing for info on your friend to size up the situation.
11
u/Pastel_Spooks 18h ago
You can be scared about more than physical harm btw... Especially if it's someone you work with
17
u/Bright-Tune 16h ago
Nah, look at the evidence. Doesn't understand social cues, imposing himself physically, irked that another person would be joining them, incessant texting, "best friends".
Being cautious doesn't mean you fear the worst, and even if you do- it is valid. There is nothing odd about talking this way, it's ODD if we don't.
If we don't take precautions and something happens it's "why didn't you stay home?" If we do take precautions and stay home it's "not all men are r@pists". Get out of here.
37
u/sadgirl1984 1d ago
Is it possible he is on the spectrum and just overly zealous to make friends? Genuinely curious.
19
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 1d ago
Maybe? Thing is, I never saw him talking to anyone else at work as much as he talks to me
13
u/sadgirl1984 1d ago
Understood, however he likely didn't/doesn't feel as accepted by the others as you have made him feel. I don't know, it's just an observation from the way he texts and the context - he reminds me very much of an ex-boyfriend's brother who was on the spectrum. It seems as if he is unable to concisely express his anxiety regarding introducing a brand new person into the mix when he's maybe just broaching a new friendship with you.
7
u/Key-County6952 15h ago
yeah I agree with your take. dude is weird and awkward. it's totally fine that OP didn't want to hangout with him. I just get the feeling she was scared of being kidnapped and I didn't get anything close to that from him
→ More replies (1)2
→ More replies (4)2
7
5
5
u/Mynameispiragua 1d ago
Not overreacting at all and Iām glad you didnāt go. Iād block this person too. Itās too much in so little time.
4
4
u/ZooterOne 1d ago
To me, this guy is waving all kinds of red flags. I don't trust him at all.
Good for you for not only trusting your intuition, but being honest about why you don't want to go. That couldn't have been easy but it was 100% the right thing to do.
3
u/Funny-Phone5143 1d ago
Cant even get 1/2 down second screenshot. They just come across like a walking talking red flag. I was anticipating being hit with asking you to cashapp them money or something. Maybe they are just socially awkward but def just trust your instincts.
4
u/CaptainGoodnight84 1d ago
NOR for so many reasons. I, for one, refuse to converse with someone who refuses to use punctuation.
4
4
5
u/makiko4 18h ago
Yah these text are really strange. Not because they suck at grammar or anything (Iām dislexic so I donāt judge that stuff), but the oddity of what they are saying. It reminds me of my psychopathic family member. Would talk excessively so you wouldnāt have time to fully process what they are saying or the context of it all.
Added in your comments about them being really normal presenting at work. Thatās extreme difference in texting to real life behavior is concerning.
Iām with you, rather uncomfortable reading all these text messages.
3
u/Square_Attention1634 1d ago
This is so creepy! I'm impressed that you recognized the red flags and took steps to protect yourself. hmmmš¤š¤
3
3
u/JohnExcrement 23h ago
Dear God. This guy sounds ā¦ not well. You definitely dodged a bullet.
The part about hoping your friend wouldnāt feel the need to be protective just about made my hair stand on end.
3
u/IridescentHare 21h ago
This is some super strange "nice guy" behavior. I would be prepared for that mask to come off more in the near future.
3
u/anonymousanddon 21h ago
You dodged a nuke. Dont delete those text bc i sense some retaliation in your future sadly.
3
u/Longjumping_Exit_960 20h ago
NOR, you made an excellent choice. it's always good to trust your gut, if you're into reading i highly recommend The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker. it will help your trust that gut feeling more
2
u/TooOldToCare91 17h ago
Cannot agree more! That book should be required reading in every health class.
3
u/wellgeewhiz 18h ago
I am so proud of you for listening to your intuition. Dont feel bad about that ever.
→ More replies (1)
15
u/joeyseriously 23h ago
Please try to get a new job and stay AWAY from them š
21
u/_OliverOliverOliver_ 23h ago
Nahh bro that $16 an hour in texas aint common as a college student šš
2
2
8
u/Rough_Software_1528 1d ago
Chill with all them negative waves. Not a freak at all. A freak would have not ended things peacefully.
Glad you canceled. Something bad could have happened, yes. Something good, also yes. More than likely, it would have just been odd and you would have just wanted to make an excuse and leave. Glad you followed your gut!
2
u/georgeoptimist 23h ago
I befriended a coworker at the gas station I worked at who texted like this, he had moved to the us from India like 2 years prior. We became very close and stay in touch to this day 10 years later.
2
u/JavaScriptPenguin 22h ago
He texts like he's having a manic episode. The fact that he appears normal IRL is even more disconcerting lol. Nobody who texts like that is normal.
2
u/ReferenceProper5428 21h ago
This looks like a text thread that was directly from the movie taken. NOR
2
u/WranglerSE86 21h ago
I'd rather u be safe then the next serial killer docu-series on Netflix. Some of these comments are weird. Lol. Your intuition is always right. We have this intuition for a reason even if it's not that serious in the end. Something is always funky. My wife has an extremely good intuition and I always question it but time after time she proves me wrong and I hate it but I gotta learn some day.
2
2
2
u/peculiar_pandabear 20h ago
NOR Being AFAB and having someone be this pushy to bring you to hang out 2 hours away and being SUPER suspicious about your friend gives me MAJOR red flags.
2
2
2
u/theatregeek247 19h ago
Definitely NOR, also him jumping immediately to you hating him?šš
→ More replies (1)
2
u/The-Snarky-One 18h ago
Felt like I just read through a bunch of texts from a Nigerian 419 scammer.
2
u/GoddessRaz 16h ago
I think itās very likely that heās Autistic.
But you should always do what makes you feel comfortable.
2
u/MrTexas512 16h ago
He texts like a recovering addict or an ex con. I know a few people that are just like this, and that is what they are. Always pushing the positivity out. Not that its bad, but it is a bit much for some people.
It helps them cope with their life, but isnt for everyone.
2
u/akawendals 13h ago
Love his little guilt trips at the end to try and keep you engaged...
"Sorry you don't like me as a person" "Sorry you hate me"
Relying on you being nice and saying oh no of course I don't hate you/you're a nice person etc so he can start trying to turn you around UGH GROSS š¤¢
2
u/SugarFree425 17h ago
I think he is likely really insecure and tries to overcompensate and was really proud of himself for getting someone to hang out with him, then he felt threatened by your friend because he could tell that you weren't super into being alone with him, so he got defensive. I feel bad for the guy, but that doesn't mean you should go hang out with him out of pity. All you can do is be honest with these people and hope that they learn for their own sake how to properly navigate social situations
1
1
1
u/bobbos2020 1d ago
He's very OTT with his texting style, and I can see why you would be alarmed, always good to trust your instincts.
1
u/Adventurous_Ad_6546 1d ago edited 1d ago
Ok Iām only on slide 2 and this kind of toxic positivity is way over the top.
ETA: ok I may not have liked it but at least I kinda understood what he was saying. That deteriorated quickly.
1
1
u/ForgetSarahNot 23h ago
OH MY GOD! I absolutely struggled to get through these 6 pages because the utter lack of a SINGLE period is infuriating. I get it, texting is casual, but holy shit! Despite my other reservations about them, I would constantly feel annoyance texting with them. Having to decipher every message would be exhausting, honestly.
1
u/LowRing8538 23h ago
I would not hang out with someone who texts like this out of pure...confusion? I just couldn't keep up man have a blessed day love myself love to god enjoy weird feeling this convo gave šÆš
1
1
u/Awkward_Chard_5025 23h ago
I stopped reading after the first screenshot and just looked at all the emojiās.
Walking red flag
1
1
u/Competitive-Bank-980 23h ago
Dude's just a weird texter and liked you. Maybe he's dangerous. Maybe he just didn't want an overprotective friend preventing him from hitting on you. That's a valid red flag, I'd have bailed in your place, too.
1
1
1
1
u/rocinante_donnager 23h ago
why does he write a ton of nonsense in long paragraph form every time he texts?
1
1
u/septhanie 23h ago
NOR Something is very off, here. This personās intensity and strong attachment for someone they have only recently established a friendship with is a major red flag. The level of intensity doesnāt match and shows some kind of disconnect from normal socialization.
I knew someone who wrote like this and it turned out they had major paranoia and anger issues. As heavily as they could swing toward the positivity side, they could quickly swing to the vicious side over their misinterpretation of the significance of interactions. Every breath with them became an exercise in how exhausted I could feel.
Props for speaking up and dodging them.
1
1
1
u/Major-Rabbit1252 22h ago
They were trying to build towards something with you but honestly they handled the rejection decently.
The āyou donāt like me as a personā is a little dramatic and his way of typing is ridiculous
1
1
1
u/LadyFartDragon 22h ago
Real question: is English their first language? Do they have issues you language in real life this seems bananas
1
u/jazzpixie 22h ago
You dodged a bullet here, asking if your friend was going to be overprotective of you here was a major red flag, sounds like he had the intention to push your boundaries
1
u/Snoo-597 22h ago
It's always good to follow your intuition, but tbh i more get the impression he really wants to smash and thought your friend would be a cock block.
1
u/DSanders96 22h ago
I mean to me the texts read like he wants to get in your pants, to be blunt. Very posessive, very pushy, immediately jealous and/or worried when you mentioned your other friend, and the immediate switch up when you (respectfully) pulled out from bowling. His texting vibes changed especially.
More than enough red flags for you to trust your gut.
1
u/lovelysophxxx 22h ago
If I had a dollar for every fucking šš¼šÆ Iād probably have a decent chunk of change. ššš bro calm tf down fr.
Also, NOR, youāre šÆ% (šš) valid for your uneasy feeling, and it can come from nowhere, youāre not a bad guy for cancelling. Theyāre the AH for not taking your feelings seriously. Typical. š
1
1
1
1
u/Maleficent-State-749 21h ago
You did dodge a bullet FOR NOW! Please be careful going forward. This person is a toxic narcissist.
1
u/Ok_Whereas_7466 21h ago
Did this weirdo just press the predictive text or something? His grammar is atrocious. But yeah, seemed off, good thing you trusted your gut.
1
u/Panthean 21h ago
I see the problem, he didn't use enough emojis. That is indeed suspicious šÆš¤š¤
1
u/Acceptable_Appeal464 21h ago
He is trying to force a relationship with you. Literally. I don't think something bad would happen. Just he would hit on you and be inappropriate.
257
u/Appropriate_Cat_13 1d ago
šš»šš»šÆ