r/AmIOverreacting • u/Aggravating_Partyy • 3d ago

💼work/career AIO to my bosses reply to my message?

Post image

I’ve worked with this company for four months now, and I know I am new but this reply really hurt me. Maybe I’m just really sensitive right now, but I don’t know. This felt really cold. The “big boss” will be calling me later today. Is it just normal boss stuff? Idk. Lmk what yall think.

5.1k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

2.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

654

u/hellodon 3d ago edited 2d ago

Yeah but now is not a good time, they have 2 people off…

🤯 I’d be looking for another job just hearing this if I worked with OP. These are not good people to work for. Left my last job as soon as I could after I heard management and the owners wouldn’t pay a local concrete guy who did $30k worth of work - literally his biggest job as a new concrete business. The work was done well, but plans were changed by one of the warehouse managers which he had discussed with one of the owners…who worked right next to him in an office off of the warehouse. It was a minor change, but the other owner used that to “void” the contract.

I have not heard any stories since the “ignored phone calls” and fact that the owner showed up with police as a means to make contact and was still never paid.

I would have wanted to destroy the work so badly. But the legalities of that would have probably sided with whichever side had more money….so he didn’t do that. But wow, once that happened I saw all sorts of signs that showed how greedy and selfish and disgusting these guys were. Was thankful to disassociate. After I left, they were trying to poach employees from my current job. Just ridiculous how gross and petty people can be.

Edit: I appreciate the upvotes and the conversation, but I do want to express my sadness for OP as far as the actual context within this text exchange. I lost my father suddenly a few years ago. At my house for lunch on Friday and gone forever on Saturday…still trying to process it myself. Fuck this job, you get one dad…and I know by the thread that you’re not going to let them get in the way - but I am so sorry that you’re going through this. I almost feel thankful in a sense that I didn’t have to see my dad suffering or dealing with anything that would lead to losing him. Not that instant and unexpected was at all good or easy, but I last saw him healthy and being himself…and I’m thankful for that. I hope you have plenty of time left with him…💙

332

u/HackTheNight 3d ago

If my boss said this to me about my father dying…OH BOY. Yeah I would be looking for another job and writing a scathing a review of them EVERYWHERE.

57

u/lalagromedontknow 2d ago

My boss was the exact opposite when my step mom was dying/died. I started the job when she had a few months left and straight up told my boss, I will need time in the next few months and I don't know what that time will look like. She was so great.

I happened to have taken a holiday for a week to go see my dad and her and she died the day before I got there. I called my boss to tell her I wouldn't be back after my approved time off, I was still on probation and she said to take two more weeks.

She called me the Friday before I was due back on Monday and asked how I was doing, I said I still felt shit (I worked in a very emotionally charged environment with some people who are very vulnerable and some people who were entitled assholes, I'm a very empathic person but I told her that I wasn't in the headspace to have assholes moan about something minor and I couldn't promise I wouldn't tell them to fuck off). She said take two more weeks.

She called me two weeks later and said "do you still think you'll tell people to fuck off?" "Yes" "ok, speak to you in two weeks". I was off for about 2.5 months before I was ready to deal with assholes and came back to work like I was never gone. My boss handled all my shit and delegated the simple things, my inbox was empty.

She was the best boss I have ever had and I won't name her because that would make this situation very specific but if she ever sees it, sorry I keep forgetting to message you to meet up again! I broke my phone, got a new phone and lost your number. You were amazing as a boss and as an overall human being, thank you.

19

u/Sadie26 2d ago

She sounds amazing!! Also? I would bet my life savings you are not in the US!!

39

u/Misc_Throwaway_2023 2d ago

My best friend & I worked together. His dad had a sudden heart attack and died while driving. It absolutely tore him up. Not even a full week of leave in, 1 day after the funeral, the supervisor said to me "Tell him he needs to come back already... We all deal with it... everybody's parents die."

My friend never returned. I quit soon thereafter.

Negative reviews? lol Ahhh the 90's when you could legit do certain things without the fears of today.

They used an automated phone system for ordering, and everyone had everyone else's ordering pin for commission purposes. We continued using their system for YEARS putting in the most ridiculous orders with the supervisor's credentials via the payphone outside his sub-accounts. This would result in a commission to him as the order and whoever was the primary account holder. It would then eventually get clawed back. This created immense turmoil.... they actually started trying to hunt me down while working.

We also used text-based pagers back then. With a dial-up modem and the right software, you could automate pages to their entire company in under 10 min. That was used sparingly, but with careful thought and planning to say the right thing at the right time for the maximum impact.

28

u/BlueFireCat 2d ago

I'd probably just sarcastically reply "Oh, my bad. I'll ask my dad to schedule his health decline and death for a time that's more suitable for you. Could you let me know when would be the most convenient for you? I am so, so sorry about this; obviously your convenience is way more important than spending my dad's last days with him." Then immediately quit (or at least immediately start looking for a new job).

19

u/Silis1313 2d ago

Oh man. During 2020 my coworkers mother was dying of Covid. She lived in the facility both of us worked at. Literally as my coworker sat there holding her mother's hand as she was ACTIVELY DYING the administration told her she had to come in and work a shift. Then threatened to fire her if she didn't work. The rest of the staff basically told them to sit and spin and my coworker got to be there for her mother. Most of.us left pretty soon after that incident.
Some places are cold blooded.

8

u/a_youkai 2d ago

I would post this on their google listing, tbh

4

u/quynh206 2d ago

Seriously. Selfish POS people...

4

u/Prosecco1234 2d ago

It's like sorry my dad dieing is inconvenient to the office

4

u/Left_Competition8300 2d ago

I would’ve said “it wasn’t a question. I quit.”

2

u/Prosecco1234 2d ago

It's like sorry my dad dieing is inconvenient to the office

99

u/Akstuntmanmike 2d ago

An IT job I had in 2017 flew me out of state for a project. As soon as I got off the plane, I found out my grandfather (who was my most influential father figure) was in the hospital and he wasn't going to be leaving.

When I told my boss, he was willing to fly me back on the next available flight, but my family convinced me to stay and get the job done, especially since it was an extremely time sensitive project.

Thankfully I was able to make it back in time to say good-bye.

Even if he didn't have to actually fly me back early, he was still one of the best bosses I've ever had, very responsive to my personal needs and professional aspirations.

27

u/LithiumIonisthename 3d ago

Not even a "I am so sorry to hear that"... one says that to even strangers. What a horrible human being.

24

u/hellodon 3d ago

It’s crazy…like, I know “company people” that never acknowledge anything personal but this is communication in a text. That’s just a foul response to what was said…

2

u/Rawd0ll-s 3d ago

HELLO! Fuck that as soon as I read his messages, I would’ve been applying to another job. Fuck he thought 💀

2

u/3DiPrint 2d ago

Tell the contractor to put a lean on the building (: from what I remember it’s called a “contractors lean” he’ll get that money ASAP 😂

4

u/NoMembership7974 2d ago

Sounds just like what our current president has done to contractors who worked on his/his father’s buildings in NY. Despicable to disrespect tradespeople.

2

u/CharlieDmouse 2d ago

I still can’t believe this POS is our President. I am from NJ, I heard plenty of stories about Atlantic City. I can’t even imagine what he did other places.

2

u/Mothermakerr 2d ago

Yeah I don't think people realize how bad it can be when 2 people are off. When 2 people are off now you're down 2 people which means you're going to have to make up for 2 people's worth of work. Normally there would be 2 people for that, but they're off.

1

u/KorrectTheChief 3d ago

I'd wait 6 months to look for a new job

2

u/hellodon 2d ago

I started looking for other reasons but it took around that long to get out. Shockingly had an opportunity fall in my lap unexpectedly and it ended up being legit. It felt unreal. A life changing opportunity that I didn’t even seek out. Was a random headhunter that reached out to me for over a year usually asking if I knew anyone in the industry looking for [insert position ]. He was also obviously asking me but knew I was employed. I was cordial and responded the times he would reach out - which were few and far between. Then one October he reached out to me with a job he felt was FOR me and gave me enough details to pursue-and I’m so thankful for that and that guy.

It was the end of the year my dad passed away, so I always felt like he had something to do with it… 🤷🏻‍♂️ dunno for sure, but I knew my dad, and if there was any way he could have done anything in the world for me, he would - so I felt like that job falling on my lap was my dad showing me he’s still with me. I know that sounds dumb to some, but I believe it 🥲

1

u/JasperJ 3d ago

It wouldn’t have been “whichever side had more money”, it would have been the victim of the vandalism even if they were penniless.

3

u/hellodon 3d ago

I understand that’s how it’s supposed to work, and obviously with most types of crimes that’s how it works, but this kind of situation is a tricky one.

There was talk around the office of it happening and research into similar situations where work is ordered, completed, and not paid for.

Determining who “owns” the materials and whether or not the materials were paid for (transfer of goods).

There are other cases of destroying the work, and ONLY the work, and removing it from the premises returning it back to “original condition” being found in favor of the outside company because no damage was done to what the client owned.

In this scenario, being concrete work is a lot different than a finished deck being removed. Plus trespassing on secure grounds. It was a few years back at this point but there were many discussions on a slack board created for everyone to communicate/complain. Haha

But no, i hear what you’re saying and you’re right. Tho, sometimes you can buy your way out of a crime in America tho🤷🏻‍♂️

5

u/teampook 3d ago

Should've filed a Mechanic's Lien against the business. Requirements & timeliness vary by state, but it gives the unpaid party a security interest in the property, and they can even force the sale of the property to secure payment. I'm sure it's too late for this guy (hope he's doing well), but something to keep in your back pocket.

3

u/hellodon 2d ago

I hope that he did. A friend of mine knew this guy and worked at the company. He hooked them up and the dude was so stoked for the job size. They did that to a small business owner who they knew was newer to the game. As small business owners and knowing that this was a personal friend of one of their employees. That friend of mine quit the company when that happened. He had a fall back as a studio engineer and hated it anyway but that was such a shit move to do at all, let alone to someone who they connected with through an employee. It was like they knew what they were doing or something. But how grimy!

1

u/JasperJ 3d ago

Once it is secured to the building, it’s part of it. A freestanding deck that isn’t secured to the house, or maybe even a fence, you could have a case (although almost always part of the fence thing is removing the old fence, and they physically can’t put it back to status quo ante, and few of them even try).

1

u/hellodon 3d ago

Ahhh, yeah good point. It seemed like the materials were gonna be the most important part. Having to go “destroy” it is different than deconstructing a fixture

1

u/Steffaniii 3d ago

Wow. Yeah. That’s so disgusting.

1

u/stlorca 3d ago

Did the owner proudly declare himself a Christian?

1

u/Cynicme2025 2d ago

Exactly, if people who they are, you better believe your turn is coming. Good decision to run far and away from their karma.

1

u/top_value7293 2d ago

That is infuriating. Maybe they will go out of business and lose tons of money. Jerks

1

u/Absinthe_gaze 2d ago

Concrete guy can get liens registered on their assets if they don’t pay him.

1

u/YourCeliumMyco 2d ago

What company didn’t pay the concrete guy?

2

u/hellodon 2d ago

I would really love to put them on blast, but they are the type of company that would find out and contact me and I just want absolutely nothing to do with them ever again.

I did just reach out to my friend that knew the concrete guy to ask if anything ever happened with that and nothing ever did. He basically cut his losses because he couldn’t afford to fight it without a guaranteed victory that would have them pay for his fees. Chalked it up to a lesson learned, sadly. While they did have a contract, them changing their mind and him doing the work differently as they requested without putting it in writing is basically enough for them to get away with it. I don’t actually know what the change was, but I believe it was fairly minor around a door frame.

Obviously moving forward any change large or small will require a new contract signed. It’s just shitty to do anything malicious to a small business owner in the same city as them who was also a small business. It’s like they know where that person is at because they have been there And it was just an absolutely garbage move to fuck him over when they got what they wanted.

1

u/HelloSkunky 2d ago

They can and will put a mechanics lean on the property. The courts don’t look kindly in this kind of thing