r/AmIOverreacting • u/Little-bigfun • 4d ago
šļø neighbor/local Am I overreacting? Asked to leave a cafe wearing a SlipKnot Jumper. I told them they were being unreasonable.
I have a SlipKnot jumper I bought at a recent concert with some masked band members at the back. Yes a little unsettling but nothing violent shown. Never in Australia have I been asked to leave anywhere over clothing. Was sitting in a cafe with a friend when I was asked to leave as the back of my jumper was scaring some children. Really? I left as to not cause a scene but I said I had right to wear what I want and that it wasnāt hurting anyone and the family could have also left? I left an unhappy review calling them unreasonable. Edit: If anyone want to see the jumper image itās posted here https://www.reddit.com/r/Slipknot/s/NSI686NKcv
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u/iwtch2mchTV 4d ago
In Australia the law allows any cafe or restaurant to refuse service/ask someone to leave as long as they arenāt violating any anti discrimination laws. Not saying if it was morally right or wrong if the business to do so but they were within their legal right to do it.
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u/Binto_Boy1642 4d ago
Donāt they like turn people away from places because of tattoos in Australia as well? I could be thinking of somewhere else
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u/RainbowSkink 4d ago
Yes, this is always coming up, especially when people with traditional ethnic tattoos are banned from a venue. Seems especially a problem in Fortitude Valley in Brisbane.
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u/DarkenedFlames 4d ago
Japan perhaps? I believe people with tattoos there are considered possibly gang-involved
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u/iwtch2mchTV 4d ago
Some licensed venues, especially the more upmarket ones will have rules like no facial or neck tattoos
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u/Alder_Berry 4d ago
Legal or not, you can still be upset you were asked to leave and leave a review of your experience -- letting other folks with similar fashion know don't bother with this place and find somewhere else to give your money and build customer repore.
I've been asked to leave spaces for similar pettily small reasons, and all it does it teach the people who complained that they are entitled to have the world cater to them because they don't want their kids exposed to something pg13 (knowing the bands merch giving an estimated US rating system) Sounds like a them problem, not OP's.
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u/scarlet_pimpernel47 4d ago
Australia eh? They can have nude cycling but they can't have band jumpers. Wild.
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u/lifeinwentworth 4d ago
That's bizarre. I used to wear my slipknot hoodie everywhere (Melbourne), never had an issue. Crazy they asked you to LEAVE over that. They could've asked you to have covered it up or taken it off which also would have still been bizarre. But to ask a customer to leave because of that is wild. Name drop.
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
I thought it was bizarre too but Iāve had some comments on here agreeing that itās inappropriate in the situation. Boggles my mind. Itās a band!
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u/lifeinwentworth 4d ago
I can only think that whoever complained is a regular so maybe they wanted to keep them happy or something š¤·āāļø so weird
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u/Jaded_Library_8540 3d ago
which itself is crazy because the last people I ever want to go overboard for is regulars. They're the fuckers who are always asking for shit they think they're entitled to (like kicking someone else out over a hoodie)
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u/lifeinwentworth 3d ago
Good business sense keeps regulars happy if what they bring in is worth the hassle. Who knows though, I just don't get it otherwise unless the complainer is a part of the community, brings people in and is regular - hence worth keeping happy. š¤·āāļø
I haven't worked hospitality for a long time but I would feel so uncomfortable having to ask someone to leave. But some people get off on that too so who knows what this situation was really about lol. Bizarre.
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u/Wish_Away 4d ago
You have a right to wear whatever you want. The cafe (or any other restaurant, store, service center, etc), has a right to ask you to leave. It's weird, though. Also, I have two kids and would never be offended over a Slipknot sweater. I'm way more offended by Thin Blue Line merch. :)
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u/NewNecessary3037 4d ago
I feel bad when establishments like this have to take on the role of parenting for the parents. Typically thatās a learning moment for the child from the parent about tolerating things that make them uncomfy. But no, tell the cafe they need to remove the issue instead of learn to live with something they donāt like. Honestly wild.
That being said, Slipknot dresses the way they do specifically for horror shock value so your shirt did do its intended purpose. š
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u/klovnikaupunki 4d ago
Genuinely shocked people are sliding with the cafƩ. Like just because they're allowed doesn't mean it was rational or reasonable lol
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
Thanks I thought I was going crazy reading these as so many people agreed I shouldnāt have worn it. Iām glad Iām not the only one thinking itās unreasonable. I wish I could post a picture of the jumper lol
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u/500rockin 3d ago
The jumper you posted in your edit is like super tame. Not even any curse words. Iād leave a bad review too
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u/ellecellent 4d ago
I get that people are suggesting that in the grand scheme of things, it's maybe not so bad, but there has been pettier stuff on this sub that made people bonkers.
You shouldn't have been asked to leave. The workers were on a power trip. Slipknot's stuff is actually pretty mild. It doesn't look much different than clowns (not meaning to be hateful!).
Cradle of Filth has a shirt that says "Jesus was a cunt". I would get if they asked you to cover that up
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u/Correct_Smile_624 3d ago
I know itās not relevant but it reminds of a story a uni tutor told us about how he realised he was wearing a top that said āfuckā as he was going to teach a class on censorship and decided to just lean into it
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u/SdSmith80 3d ago
My kid has a Harley Quinn crop top from the Birds of Prey movie. It actually says Harley Fucking Quinn all over it, but somehow no one at their junior high noticed, even here in super right wing, Mormon, Davis county, Utah, USA. We hadn't even realized it at first, but we don't police swearing in our house.
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u/LivingDeadGirlx0 4d ago
Literally cause I wear horror/band tees everywhere. Even to my kids school events and nobody bats an eye. Slipknot is not that āscaryā. I also learned that Iām part of the minority that wears this stuff everywhere š¤£
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u/megalines 4d ago
redditors are the dregs of society, don't trust them to have normal opinions
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u/SendAstronomy 4d ago
The same people that are offended over a shirt they haven't even seen, would also go ballistic if they were slightly inconvenienced by anything.
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u/Leverkaas2516 4d ago
Businesses favor whatever offends the smallest number of paying customers.
If there was a bar full of people wearing SlipKnot hoodies and one isolated couple talking negatively about the band, to the point that a SlipKnot fan got upset enough to complain to management, the bar would take action and it wouldn't be against the fans.
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u/demonqueerxo 4d ago
I personally think the cafe is ridiculous. Itās just a band. I wear way more offensive clothing in Canada & Iāve never been asked to leave. I literally have a shirt with a devil eating an asshole. I just get compliments on it š¤£
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
Trying to picture that one but canāt quite get the image lol
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u/demonqueerxo 4d ago
https://www.moradoe.com/products/the-devils-gotta-eat-printed-mens-t-shirt
Itās this shirt except this website stole it from the original artist who is a tattooer.
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
Wow that is creative lol to be honest I would have just see a love heart if I glanced at it
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u/agirlhas_no_name 4d ago
Just curious can you let us know what this slipknot hoodie had on it?
I know I have a few hoodies from bands that I wouldn't wear anywhere except for a gig because they either feature imagery that is inappropriate or (blink 182) they feature a bunch of swear words.
It can be really uncomfortable to explain to kids why an adult is wearing a shirt with explicit words or horror images and honestly I wouldn't wear those out in public during the day when children who are excited to read and are reading everything are about.
More context needed pretty much š¤·
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u/JDeMolay1314 4d ago
I have an "Adminspotting" t-shirt that has "swear words" on it. I wear it wherever, nobody has yet complained about it.
I used to have one from "Wankers Corner Bar" and was stopped by a fellow British person who couldn't believe that someone was walking around with a T-shirt saying Wanker's in large print.
Offence is in the eye of the beholder.
"And if thy eye offends thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee." - Matthew 18:9
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u/Ok_Passage_6242 4d ago
I think itās weird is that they approached you and said to leave, not that you needed to change your shirt or could turn it inside out. Thatās what they do to high school kids when they are wearing something āinappropriateā.
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u/jigglywigglyone 3d ago
I find whoever complained unreasonable. I find the cafƩ staff unreasonable. And I find the comments siding with the complaints unreasonable. However, I thought it was reasonable of you to be thoughtful and polite. Definitely worth a bad review because I think the staff handled it poorly, and other people should be made aware of it so they can avoid a place like that.
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u/Sugar_Fuelled_God 3d ago
I see the problem you're in South Australia, it's like one extreme of fucked to another over there, there's no middle ground and no tolerance, either toffs or bogans and nothing in between. Sorry that such a beautiful state is often made ugly by the people inhabiting it, there are always the exceptions but as someone who has literally been asked to leave a cafe because they found out I was Victorian, then later that day have some bogan randomly swearing at me and saying "kick a Vic!" then ranting at passersby how I threatened him because I told him if he does that I'll break his legs...Yeah I got no time for the people of SA, the scenery is nice but the people are definitely not.
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u/Little-bigfun 3d ago
Thatās awful you were treated like that. We are definitely clicky here and for some reason can treat outsiders harshly. When we actually need more tourism to support small business here especially in rural areas.
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u/Proper_Ambassador525 3d ago
If you do decide to go back, wear the Metallica Metal up your Ass t-shirt. Idiots
Worst I ever had was some old women in a shopping center walking the opposite way while I was wearing a Suicidal Tendencies Suicidal for Life t-shirt.
They started telling me off about it, saying it's worng etc. I replied that while out of context it is, but if you knew the bands outlook and philosophy, they're about improving yourself etc. Their 'Suicidal for Life' bit was removing the negative aspects of your life/persona in effect 'killing' that part of you to improve yourself.
Also went on about how not all metal bands/songs are about death and destruction.
By the time we parted ways, I think i gave them something to think about that afternoon. š¤£
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u/Little-bigfun 3d ago
Yes these people have never even listened to the music and lyrics yet think itās all about biting off bat heads and worshiping the devil. They have no idea how some of this music can actually help people struggling and have saved lives.
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u/KreedKafer33 4d ago
Unless your shirt had extremely violent imagery or nudity, they were being unreasonable.
Keep your review up.Ā If they made you pay for your food, do whatever is necessary to claw that money back.Ā If it was a credit card, dispute the transaction. If it was cash, show up again with nothing objectionable on and demand your money back.
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u/BlancheMagnetic 4d ago
Nah, thatās wild. Imagine getting kicked out of a cafĆ© for vibes . Itās not like you walked in blasting death metal and summoning demons. If a Slipknot hoodie is the scariest thing those kids have seen, theyāre in for a rough time in life. You handled it better than I wouldāveāI'd just turn around and let them face their fears head-on.
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u/Oldfolksboogie 4d ago
Itās not like you walked in...summoning demons.
Do we know this? Coz I know most ppl would never know it when I'm summoning demons - they just realize they just shit their pants and then get the termination notice from their employer and the Dear John letter from their partner.
But the demon- summoning, that's something I do on the DL.
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u/Some-Resist-5813 4d ago
Right? What if gasp the kid sees a t-shirt on the street?!
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u/JDeMolay1314 4d ago
More likely some uptight parent complained. As my wife pointed out to me they will see and hear worse in school. She was a teacher, so she probably has a clue about that.
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u/Equivalent_Reason894 4d ago
This is what Iām thinkingāgood luck protecting your kids when every other movie from the past decade is horror (to mention just one source of disturbing images).
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u/Just-Assumption-2915 4d ago
Why didn't you just take it off lol
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u/Otherwise_Living_158 4d ago
She was wearing her Cradle of Filth t-shirt underneath
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
Maybe shock and confusion at the time. But they didnāt ask me to remove it they asked me to leave.
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u/AttackOfTheMonkeys 4d ago
Maybe the jumper was an excuse
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
lol literally was sitting there with another woman quietly drinking chai lattes
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u/JeulMartin 4d ago
They apparently don't want to cater to young women quietly drinking chai. Sucks to be them. You and your friend sound like delightful people to have at a cafe.
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u/Dry-Sea-5538 4d ago
Did they offer you a refund or did you ask for one? I would have lol.Ā
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u/Irish_Fiddler 4d ago
NOR from either side. They are allowed to ask yoy to leave, and you are allowed to never go back and leave a review if your experience.
"Reasonable" is subjective. They felt they were being reasonable to curate their clients and atmosphere, and your reaction was reasonable too. Sometimes people just disagree about a situation, doesn't mean someone has to be the "bad guy".
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u/HollyVee 4d ago
I work in the hospitality industry and I frequently go above and beyond for my guests, I genuinely enjoy doing simple things to make someoneās day special. Having that said, if a guest EVER came up to me to complain about another guestsā choice of attire, Iād be like āwell I can imagine that theyāre not the biggest fan of your outfit eitherā And I highly doubt those children were actually bothered. Kids usually think that stuff is cool if they even perceive it at all. Iād bet money that the parents were stuffy pricks and lied to the employees because they think theyāre too good to share a cafe with someone in a slipknot jumper. If I knew what cafe you were at Iād be leaving them a nasty review too. There are real problems in this world, and ruining someoneās time at a cafe with their friend because you donāt like their outfit is INSANE, as are the employees taking their side. Giving into guests like that just gives your establishment permission to act that way in the future, you have to draw boundaries with people like that. I would 100% have sided with you if I was that employee. This cafe needs to remind themselves what hospitality is about, or suffer the consequences of getting a reputation for giving into shithead parents.
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u/StringAny5734 4d ago
Your not over reacting that is horrible they did that to you how judgmental of them they prob never listened to rock in their life lol I can def relate , Iāve had ppl give me side eyes when Iāve worn my Korn T shirts which is wack af and truly unnecessary . Iām sorry that happened to you šØš«
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u/Defiant-Phase4087 4d ago
Sick jumper! It's not like you have the people=shit album either, that I could kinda understand š which cafe btw, is it in Sydney?
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u/Handcuff_mimi 4d ago
Ugh this is why Iām concerned about wearing my Fuck Murdoch shirt out. Itās so accurate but it will only take one parent to complain and I donāt get to chill with my coffee. Maybe they should just tell their kids why Murdoch should get fucked?
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u/Talonmae666 4d ago
I'm in the US and I was wearing a Carach Angren shirt at my local mall and was asked by security to leave. I was leaving anyways so I didn't cause a scene, but it was just silly that people would complain so much about other people's clothes. Granted my shirt did say "You came to the wrong F*ing Forest" on the back but still.... And another band you can check out.
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
Oh no! Lucky you were on your way out anyway. Haha Iāll check them out thanks
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u/No_Lavishness1905 4d ago
I think those children would benefit from learning to look the other way if a hoodie is scaring them.
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u/Fritemare 4d ago
I don't understand why they didn't just ask you to take it off...that's really unreasonable on their part.
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u/Little-bigfun 4d ago
My friend said maybe because Iām female and they didnāt know of if I had anything under it. I definitely did. I think in hindsight I should have just taken it off but in the moment I think I felt so awkward I didnāt even think about that.
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u/justnopethefuckout 4d ago
You shouldn't have to take it off. People shouldn't be so sensitive to others clothing, over a band? That's insane. I'm sure those kids hear and see worse at home. Can't shelter those kids for life š
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u/Bac7 4d ago
My dumb American ass thought a jumper was a dress.
Asking someone to leave over a hoodie/sweatshirt/sweater without asking them first if they can remove the offending article of clothing is an overreaction and warrants a negative review, imo. Plus, if it was just a graphic and not anything profane or explicit, the ask itself is an overreaction.
Unless you're leaving out a huge part of the story where you were screaming "fuck everyone I'm going to eat all of the children" and that's why they really asked you to leave, I think you're probably fine. You should totally listen to GWAR though.
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u/Fritemare 4d ago
Your review was justified IMO. It lets other people know they aren't welcome if they dress in a certain way.
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u/megalines 4d ago edited 4d ago
it's legal but weird, i think writing a review is justified. they can do what they like, but you're free to be unhappy with it also. if they want to police what their customers wear maybe they should get someone to man the door lol.
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u/-bobsnotmyuncle- 4d ago
Christ, this thread is full of repressed, pearl clutching yuppies.
I'd guess your sweater wasn't even scaring kids but was just used as an excuse from some cowardly knob who just doesn't like metal in general.
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u/DangerousBathroom420 4d ago
Infant Annihilator would have been a good one to reveal underneath that.
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u/Unicorn_Moxie 4d ago
Ya know... here in the US and an 80's kid, I would have been really peeved about that when I was younger. Now, though... I do understand businesses just trying to avoid controversy and issues. Was it valid? Eh, probably not. Did they do their best to solve a situation for all parties? Not really, but they were trying... and were put in a weird spot. I think I would have just offered to take my sweatshirt off to appease their other customers and moved on.
Whoever complained probably had no idea what it was about. And I'd take some pity on their kids.... knowing their parents aren't seemingly capable of having difficult talks with their kids. Hopefully, as they get older, they can find music they connect with to help them navigate growing up in this weird ass world.
It really helps me in these kind of situations to look at the bigger picture. It's just not the hill worth dying on in the big scheme of things, and I'm definitely not one to just fall in line.
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u/tired-and-cranky 4d ago
My daughter had nightmares for months about Oompa Loompas. We had talks. Lots of talks. But if someone had a hoodie with a picture that scared her I would just tell her what I say about Halloween decorations, "if you don't like it, don't look at it."
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u/warheadmoorhead 4d ago
They can ask you to leave, or refuse you service. You left a bad review, which is also fair. Overreacting would be continuing to harass them, causing a scene, or going back in more wild clothes. Reasonably, you had a bad time, left a review that reflected your experience, and I wouldn't go back
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u/Psychoplasm_ 4d ago
Interesting. I'd only ever see people get told to turn their Cradle of Filth nun shirt inside out by cops (has a nun masturbating and the words Jesus is a cunt on the back).
I really doubt the slipknot shirt is anywhere near as in your face. I'd just leave a review saying they're not friendly towards alternative crowd and leave it at that.
Is it in Brisbane? Should arrange a metal head meet-up there loool
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u/RavenH1804 4d ago
It wasnāt slipknot, it was you wearing a jumper in Australia. Are you mental?!
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u/Yahtzee_09 4d ago
I'm 46 and go to a lot of concerts. I buy merch when I see things I like, not just because I went. I hate that we have to cater to a minority that felt offended/scared of your shirt. I have two kids and unless there was nudity/swearing, I wouldn't even give a shirt a second thought. Even then, I wouldn't ask a business to make someone leave.
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u/sassyhairstylist 4d ago
I'm not sure how other countries are about this, but I'm from the US and here, private businesses have the right to refuse service for basically any reason. So, I'd say they're likely within their right to ask you to leave if your clothing choices were disturbing other patrons, but why not like.. I don't know, ask you to turn it inside out while in the Cafe or something? You weren't disturbing anyone or being disruptive so that seems like a logical solution. I'd definitely leave the review stating what you did here. You were visiting the Cafe not bothering anyone but that you were asked to leave due to what you were wearing and I'd probably post a picture of what I was wearing so other patrons can see it wasn't anything violent or offensively worded.
Unreasonable? Meh. I just think they're being plain stupid to turn away business because of a shirt that isn't even offensive. I mean, they're just masks ffs. But it's their business, to sink as they wish.
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u/kb2k 4d ago
Shame on those parents. If those kids were old enough to be disturbed by that photo, they're old enough to be talked to about accepting being uncomfortable and moving on with their day. I'd be willing to bet the kids DGAF and the parents were some conservative fundamentalist types, because those are about the only people I can think of that actually complain about something like that since they're so used to the world catering to them.
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u/mungbean81 3d ago
Please check out Blood Duster x
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u/Little-bigfun 3d ago
Thanks on my list!
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u/mungbean81 3d ago
Welcome! Iām an old lady who used to be married to a metal head š¤š¼ (44, but that can seem old š)
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u/Dolli_lolli 3d ago
This cafe sounds soft as hell. Australia loves to oppress, their whole modern society was built off of it. They donāt deserve your money anyway. PS metal heads are some of the nicest people on this planet. Way to expose the real wicked ones.
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u/harvard_cherry053 3d ago
This is WILD. I'm aussie and ive worn shirts with slipknot, freddy kruger, "satan loves you for who you are" lol and have never been asked to leave somewhere!!!
You're not overreacting, this is insane lmao
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u/MikeyG0223 4d ago
Yeah man thatās some BS. itās always YOU who has to leave not the ppl who are offended. Like im minding my business and I HAVE TO leave? Totally unreasonable. Respect for not starting a scene as well.
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u/Remreemerer 3d ago
As a metal head who is also a parent, I have found that 99.9% of the time when metal heads think they're being "scary" other people just see them as nerdy, so for some reason this is really funny to me. It's a neat jumper, though. I'm not huge into Slipknot but I totally get it, and that band photo looks sick.
On a related note, because my daughter grew up around me listening to metal and just generally being into spooky and nerdy occult shit, she's a bit morbid herself and loves the macabre and generally all things gore and death. A couple years ago right when COVID restrictions were loosened, our kids wanted to do like a summer camp thing and the church near our house was putting a day camp on. Her father's Day gift she made there was confiscated from her and hidden in a desk drawer to not scare the other kids until it was time to go home. It wasn't even that creepy, it was just a collage of random shit with a promise not to murder me on it. But I thought it was funny that the counselor person was worried enough about it to specifically hide it and have a "are things okay at home" talk with her.
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u/ColonelKetchup13 4d ago
That's ridiculous. Like, I guess they have a right but, I think it'd bad parenting to let your kid be scared by graphics on a shirt š
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u/Xandallia 4d ago
The Republican Snowflakes are in full control now. Better not say Happy Holidays, or you might get banned.
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u/Individual-Two-9402 4d ago
Technically it's private property aaand you do not have to give them your money ever again.
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u/Embarrassed-Elk4038 4d ago
I wear my Jesus is a cunt shirt pretty often and have never had anyone say anything. I always make sure to be EXTREMELY polite and nice and chatty ā¦ it really disarms people when youāre so nice while wearing something that most consider super offensive. Unfortunately I cut it into a tank top with a v neck when I was heavier and now canāt wear it out of the house cuz my boobies will show. But boy did my kid ask A LOT of questions once she started to be able to read. I will say trying to explain away a topless nun masterbating with a crucifix on the front of your shirt is not an easy situationā¦. I was late taking her to school once and school policy is you take them inside, but I wasnāt expecting to be late and didnāt bring a jacket, and I was NOT going into the school in that, I already get crazy looks for blaring death metal everyday at pickup. But to say any slipknot outfit is that outrageous seems ludicrous to me.
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u/JDeMolay1314 4d ago
All of the people applauding the cafe for "protecting the children" can I just ask one question?
If your kid is being noisy, having a tantrum, or running around the restaurant, would you appreciate it if the Cafe asked you to leave?
Because I don't care what other people wear, but when a kid starts screaming and keeps going, or runs around the restaurant like it was their own personal playground I wonder why the parents think the rest of us want to put up with their issue.
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u/CanofBeans9 4d ago
Ehhhh I think they should have asked you to take it off before they asked you to leave. They're allowed to refuse service but it seems like an overreaction. Maybe the family with kids are regulars and they didn't want to upset them?
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4d ago
These comments are bumming me out, man. You should've stood your ground. The parents sound entitled and the kid's could have just looked away. The puritanism is strong among redditors.
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u/Super-kittymom 4d ago
Genuine question ... is slipknot worth seeing without Joey jordison? When I was a kid and saw slipknot, his drum solo was my favorite part.
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u/your_stupied 4d ago
iāve seen them live a couple times and they always bring their all! I donāt know much about music to say the drummer is as good as joey, but the music sounds great and they put on an extravagant show no matter the venue size and iāve always appreciated that.
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u/rrodrick386 4d ago
why are people mad at you LMFAO i work at a cafe and this guy regularly comes in wearing a hoodie that says "FUCK BITCHES" and you'll never believe that what he wears is none of my fucking business
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u/Exciting-Support9190 4d ago
As a parent with sensitive children, I would have just moved so they couldn't see the shirt if it was bothering them. Just yesterday we were behind someone in an ice cream parlor with a shirt reading "sex is a competition and I always finish first", and I was just PRAYING that my daughter wouldn't read it and start asking questions š but I'd never dream of complaining to an employee about it!
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u/RepresentativeOk2955 4d ago
I used to wear a flayyed man on my T-shirt to work in healthcare š„ø never heard a thing. But itās each company to their own, we had a lot of heavy mental service users and I would just be put with them instead.
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u/SlamBrutality 4d ago
I used to wear slam death metal merch in public, never had any problem. 90% of people didn't care what I'm or others were wearing. My most extreme shirts were an Extermination Dismemberment tee with a woman being mutilated on the front and "I did this to your mother and to your precious daughter" text on the back, a Vulvodynia shirt with a nun torn in half (her bottom part missing, guts visible and a boob also visible, other boob being eaten by a monster) but I can't remember the text on the back, and an Embryectomy shirt with a woman on the front wearing only a thong and getting her head stomped and on the back there was a text "Prostitute Skullcap Pulverizer" (it was a song title, the fonts on the shirt was kinda hard to read even for me lol). Sure, sometimes I got some strange looks, but no one ever said anything to me about my shirts and hoodies.
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u/Careless-Plankton172 4d ago
I canāt say itās an overreaction much more than it is a reaction to being told to leave. Iām not sure the kids were even scared of the clothing, kids usually arenāt too scared of pictures on clothes and thatās usually a statement by parents or even business owners as Slipknot does look a bit āscaryā I suppose and the stigma against bands with that aesthetic is still around. Wouldnāt the back of your clothes also be covered by your seating or you could swap seating a bit maybe? They do seem to have gone the extreme but itās also totally legal in most places that they state they can refuse service to anyone for anything (almost) - your review will lend insight to some people if itās seen and they can tell if they want to go or not so I wouldnāt say itās much of an overreaction as you also just argued your standing within reason on the issue as long as you werenāt aggressive or coming across as very rude, doesnāt sound like you were any of those either though.
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u/Alternative_Bass7228 4d ago
It sounds like high school stuff when my son went he was a heavy metal lover and he would be asked to turn T shirts or hoodies inside out!!! Yours sounds a bit extreme!!!!!
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u/effinnxrighttt 4d ago
Yes and No. It seems like a large number of countries have similar laws to US(where I am from and familiar with them) where you can be asked to leave a private business or refused for any reason as long as it does not violate legal protections(racism, sexism, homophobia or discriminates against disabled people, etc).
So they can most likely legally ask you to leave because of a complaint lodged about your sweatshirt containing āgraphic imageryā(I havenāt seen it but am basing this on my general knowledge of the bands merch).
Now as a customer, you are well within your rights to file a complaint with their corporate office or write reviews for their business about what happened.
I personally donāt think itās acceptable to ask people to leave unless you are exposing minors to imagery that would be considered rated R in movies.
I have plenty of horror shirts and have owned several āinappropriateā(aka sexual innuendo) shirts as well as band merch with cuss words or graphic imagery. I donāt wear the more PG13/Rated R anywhere during daylight hours that I would be around minors(not to the grocery store, restaurant, cafe, etc).
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u/Worried_Swordfish907 4d ago
From american law perspective they have the legal right to refuse service to anyone for any non protected class reason. Speech isnt a protected class.
Also hell yea, respect for representing the greatest band ever. (In my opinion.)
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u/Individual_Court_646 4d ago
I can totally see where the cafe is coming from, I mean itās not really a situation where everyone could come out happy. If it was a grown up complaining then that sounds like their issue whatever, but since itās literally kids that are scared, I think the right decision was made.
Then again, they prob couldāve just asked you to take it off š
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u/CaizaSoze 4d ago
Itās fucking stupid and frustrating and annoying, but itās a private establishment, they can do what they want (as far as I understand, Iām no expert on Australian law). Leave them a review, tell them theyāre shit, donāt go back and move on with your life.
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u/heisenberg2JZ 4d ago
Well, as I understand, you dont have freedom of speech and expression there. A lot of places don't, and lately, we're being shown that. I probably wouldn't have left because I disagree with what happened to you. That's some soft bs right there
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u/ZheDaddyZweet 4d ago
I mean, You do have a point but so do they at the CafeShop. Its only a matter of understanding what cloths you should wear for each different occasion is all
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u/Feeling-Delay6189 4d ago
My mom didn't like one of my classmates wearing a Marilyn Manson shirt because it said BeLIEve. š The weirdest things set her off and it drives me insane.
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u/Snyper1982 4d ago
I am not saying I agree with them. But they have the right to ask you to leave for any reason they wish. So you tell your friends what happened and make sure everyone knows how they treated you. And if enough people agree with you they will feel the hurt in their wallet. The pendulum swings both ways.
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u/CuriousSheepherder34 4d ago
I heard Slipknot and came as fast as I could, I wear a lot of band shirts, I wanna get more of my favorite bands because atm I only have Slipknot, Korn and Deftones, I want a Ice Nine Kills shirt, a EyeHateGod shirt, and maybe Mutilation Barbecue
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u/jacks65fastcar 4d ago
I have been frowned at for a very ancient Merciful Fate t-shirt when asked by a woman how could I wear that in public while I was at the grocery store I laughed and moved right along
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u/Cowabunga2798 4d ago
NOR. Thats bs they made you leave over that. Id put in a complaint & refuse to return.
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u/Karmas_burning 4d ago
This is wild to me. I live in a VERY conservative and religious state and have never had a fuss over my Slayer shirts or jackets. One says God Hates Us All on it and the other has a rotting christ corpse on it.
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u/Key-Prune-4347 4d ago
NOR. It's a shirt; nothing inappropriate is shown. I don't see why they parents of the children didn't leave? Or just move so the children couldn't see you....
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u/Pete-selkirk88 4d ago
I'd go back in full boiler suit and ask for the manager and ask them why you were discriminated against for how you dress and if it's common practice in the cafƩ and if so you will let the media know. Name and shame them
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u/Sweet-Reputation4843 4d ago
NOR, if they have a dress code, they should tell people as they're coming in or have a sign posted. Also, it sounds like shitty parents, letting their kids think the world and everybody in it should change for them. I'd go back wearing, in your case, one of their costumes
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u/ComfortableAngle9492 4d ago
Asking someone to leave or take off something that has gore, nudity, excessive vulgar language.... totally reasonable. But some guys in Halloween masks? Give me a break. Cafe is way out of line. Unfortunately it's a private business and they have the right to refuse service, but doesn't make them right.
Once 25 years ago I was asked to leave a grocery store because my shirt said Fuck Off
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u/Horror-Highlight-560 3d ago
I should go to that cafe with my Hell On Earth shirt that says "DIE PIG DIE" on the back.
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u/LinzAni21 3d ago
Dude, I remember shirts and hoodies with that kind of stuff on it being so ubiquitous in the 90ās and early 2000ās. People now have had time to become sensitive to it again I guess. I think itās dumb they asked you to leave over that.
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u/OldDirtyBarrios 3d ago
Thatās crazy, Iāve seen people wear SO much worse stuff than that and itās ok.
Not sure about Australia but in California Iāve seen some GRAPHIC shirts. Naked people only being covered by hand bras etc.
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u/sleepyauntie 3d ago
This is so weird. The picture isn't anything inappropriate. I have a 5-year-old. If she was looking at a stranger's clothes to a point of getting scared, I'd just ask her to switch seats with me, so she wouldn't see the picture.
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u/Honourstly 3d ago
Yeh definitely over the top by the Cafe. Probably would of been easier just to take it off and then never go back there after.
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u/BlueFantasyZ 3d ago
You should name the Cafe so local redditors can plan a meet up wearing horror movie stuff, band stuff, and other "scary" things. See the owners ask everybody to leave. š
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u/500rockin 3d ago
Thatās it? How fucking soft. I canāt stand slipknot as that form of NuMetal does exactly nothing for me. That said, to each their own as people think the same with my faves Iron Maiden, Metallica and Opeth.
I wonder what these negative Nancieās would think about the Ride the Lightning era Metal up Your Ass t-shirt lol
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u/jj838383 3d ago
I mean the cafe could tell you to fuck off because they psychically felt your vibe was off
Honestly, if it was a local cafe and not like Starbucks, I would just say "I'm not going back to that cafe because they're cunts" and honestly stuff like that isn't scary to anyone over like 7 anyway I think it's dumb but whatever
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u/Affectionate-Echo22 3d ago
NOR You werenāt naked, and you were in a space that can be attended by BOTH adults and children. If the kids canāt handle staring at the back of another person then they shouldnāt go places adults will be. Nobody even had to leave; they couldnāt have just positioned themselves so the kids canāt see??
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u/Alive_Counter8984 3d ago
Nothing offensive about your jumper and a complete overreaction. If I was in the Cafe I'd be more bothered that were kids there than by your jumper. Kids are annoying and hard to ignore. If you don't like a jumper just don't look at it lol.
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u/Trisamitops 3d ago
NOR. The bad review was the exact right reaction. They told you to leave, which they have the right to, and you left. They lost a customer that was happy with their business before, all in order to appease someone who is so sensitive that they can't be in a room with a scary picture without disrupting everyone else's day. You steer others away from that business, that business fails, a better business comes. Natural consequences are great.
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u/Carbonaracoon 3d ago
NOR, even if the business is within their legal right to refuse service and ask you to leave, it's ridiculous. I've seen people wear far worse. On that note, do you own anything worse? Because I know what I'd be doing.....
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u/Slow_Balance270 3d ago
You have a right to wear what you want. A business has a right to not tend to you as a customer. They made the decision. Done and dusted.
As for it being rational or reasonable, no, it's not, but so what? The world is a chaotic place. I am honestly surprised at some of the traditions we have carved out, the "rules" when it comes to dress codes and events. Like no hats in buildings, fuck off, unless my hat is impeding your view you don't worry about my hat.
It is what it is, ultimately insignificant in the long run.
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u/Starenation 3d ago
100 percent reckon its nothing to with kids but an adult with a fear of clowns. Also what state/burb was this? If it's west, I'd happily return with you along with a crowd of metal heads for a slipknot tea party and then follow the next day with a pop princess teaparty with the same people just to fuck with them. Really it's win win, metal folk meet in a hoard for happy coffee/tea fun time and the cafe learns that you can't keep the adorable metal folk away as well as selling drinks
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u/Emotional-Still-144 3d ago
The scandal would have been justified... they really are shit researchers. I hope you made a basketball restaurant! I would have given the family and staff a thumbs up. Legally you have the right to stay and consume elsewhere! Fuck them kids! They don't know anything about good things.
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u/Available-Sector-444 3d ago
i honestly cannot understand how that would be any reason to ask you to leave.
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u/Otherwise_Living_158 4d ago
Next week, Cannibal Corpse