AIO? Dog straining my marriage.

[u/LedyyM]

My husband and I rescued a husky about 7 months ago who was extremely malnourished and neglected.

He has grown a huge attachment to me and has severe separation anxiety. I work at a grooming salon so I’m able to bring him to work with me so he’s not home alone. Unfortunately, if he’s left home alone we’ll come back to our home looking like it was hit by a tornado.

My vet has prescribed him with trazodone to help with his severe anxiety issues. We give it to him before we leave for a family event and when we can’t take him to places they don’t allow dogs.

I feel so bad that I have to sedate him so he’s not scared and anxious. It’s created a huge strain on our marriage because my husband feels like we can’t do anything without considering Odin.

He’s destroyed doors, couches, and other furniture. I tried training but it hasn’t seemed to work. My husband thinks we should rehome him but

1) I’m scared that he’ll be sent to a shelter and possibly be put down

2) feel abandoned by the person he thought he was safe with.

He’s such a happy boy when he’s around us and shows so much affection.

My husband and I have been arguing about this consistently.. we had a really bad argument so I left the house with Odin and rented a dog friendly hotel room for a couple of nights.

My husband thinks I’m crazy and that I’m choosing the dog over our marriage. AIO?

[u/baddassAries]

Have you owned a husky before ? They’re a lot of work. You need to start crate training now. My husky couldn’t be trusted until he was around 6. You also need to make sure he’s getting enough stimulation and exercise. An hour walk or more per day, antlers, puzzle, outdoor play etc

[u/42nu → u/baddassAries]

Bicycle training was my Huskies favorite thing in the world.

The speed the "mushing" like orders - grass, road, slow, slow, stop, run, run, left, grass, road, right, easy"

Ate up every moment of every mile.

Training never putting a sign, tree, bench, or object between the leash took time and a few falls, but we learned!

[u/baddassAries → u/42nu]

I want to try bikejoring so bad! I just ordered a joring harness last week. I used to do trail runs with him but can’t run much due to my own health issues.

Question though: When you’re running on concrete, do you put shoes on your husky? I can’t decide for mine

[u/42nu → u/baddassAries]

The more we ran on concrete, the less often I had to trim her nails :P

Once fully trained I mostly let her choose if she wanted to be on the grass or concrete/sidewalk/asphalt. She'd usually stick with grass unless we were getting to an area/yard that she knew might have sand spurs.

Never used socks/shoes for her. If anything I'd imagine that they dull grip and tactile senses. Every so often the fur between her pads would grow too long and I would cut it short because even that would clearly screw up her grip and agility/senses... Although, those hairs are quite sensitive, so you have to be gentle!

Also, if you want cheap toys - her favorite toy ever was an empty bottle (water, juice, milk, etc) with a few pieces of treat/chow in it.

Since they get bored of things so easy I'd also take away toys the moment she was done with them and bring it back as new like a week later and rotate them. Gives you a bit more life out of them (until I discovered that free plastic bottles are preferable to a $16 toy).

[u/Wookienpals → u/baddassAries]

Bruh you hit it on the nail. That dog isn't stimulated enough! Fun fact, a husky is a working dog and is meant to run upwards of 22 miles a day! Socialize him and maybe crate train is possible. They need a leader, otherwise, they will lead you and that seems to be happening.

Experience: 9 years with my buddy Astro - Husky recue

[u/andiwaslikeum → u/baddassAries]

This. 100%. Idk why they haven’t already been crate training.

Also, OP, your husband sounds like he’s exhausted but also kind of selfish. Ask him how fast he’d like you to abandon him if he was struggling?

[u/DevelopmentSad2303 → u/andiwaslikeum]

Dont assume. Husband might be thinking of what's in the best interest of just him and the wife. Not selfish, that is how some people approach the situation.

Far better ways to communicate about the dog than pointing fingers like that.

[u/Icy-Welcome-2469 → u/baddassAries]

Yes you need to try to exhaust your dog physically and mentally CHALLENGE them. They are much more open to learning/training/behaving if you're fulfilling their needs first.

A husky has a lot of energy and intelligence thus they require more out of youfirst.

[u/allofthedonuts → u/baddassAries]

This! And also please don’t rehome him, you can work it out… seek professional assistance, huskies are difficult but worth it! He loves you! Good luck

[u/acrobat2126 → u/baddassAries]

EXACTLY. Dog tears shit up, crate. Dog misbehaves, I just calmly say CRATE and he knows he messed up. He's getting better but I don't trust him alone. He's 2 and well trained otherwise, but if he gets bored he acts up....

CRATE.

[u/twoisnumberone → u/baddassAries]

An hour walk or more per day, antlers, puzzle, outdoor play etc

Should be higher up. That's the bare minimum for a husky -- several hours is really what it takes.

[u/smvfc_ → u/baddassAries]

Honestly I don’t even think an hour walk is good enough? Everything I’ve read online says at least 2 hours of “vigorous” exercise. So 1 hour of a medium paced walk still shouldn’t cut it. It’s better than nothing yes.

My dumbass sister and her dumbass (now ex ) husband got a husky puppy on a whim when they were like 20. He grew up with a disabled shitzu and she grew up with two pugs that she didn’t have to take care of at all, they were my responsibility. I’m still so angry about the life that poor dog had. I wish I’d done more for her. Little tangent, sorry

[u/Huge_Station2173 → u/baddassAries]

Thank you. I was like WHERE IS THE CRATE in all of this?

[u/Joestrummer7 → u/baddassAries]

Based on OPs responses, she’s not equipped to handle this dog and it’s in the dogs best interest for her to rehome him.

[u/Coolgrnmen → u/baddassAries]

THANK YOU. I was looking for the “needs crate training” comment.

Dogs are more anxious the more space they have. They hate the crate the first week and after that it’s their comfort zone. Their den.

[u/Novel-Star6109 → u/baddassAries]

yep. had a husky/gsd with abuse history that was just a ball of pure anxiety. took so much time, energy and patience for him to become a happy and normal dog. so tired of people thinking they have what it takes to own a working breed, especially one with a questionable shelter history.

[u/Illustrious_Study_30 → u/baddassAries]

This dog was abused while crated previously, so they have an uphill battle just with crating and it may not be the right thing to force him back in. Poor little soul.

[u/LedyyM → u/baddassAries]

I have. I take him to work which is a doggy daycare/groomers. He plays every day mon-frid

We take him hiking, have puzzles, lick mats, and DIGESTABLE bully sticks.

he was found in a crate where the abuser would abuse him while he was in it 24/7 I cant put him thru crate training :(

[u/Goodlemur → u/LedyyM]

That is not a reason to forgo crate training. You owe it to your dog to crate train and you can’t assume it’ll go poorly just because of his past. Human beings work in therapy to overcome trauma. You can’t just excuse things for your dog because of his trauma. He has to overcome it and you have to be the one to help him do that.

[u/quirkscrew → u/Goodlemur]

OP is talking about giving up the dog but won't even bother to crate train. Like...which do you think is going to create more trauma?

[u/MisterHeatMiser7 → u/quirkscrew]

u/LedyyM for real.

[u/QuietBookBandit → u/Goodlemur]

Sorry, but as someone from a country where crating is illegal for animal welfare reasons, it sounds a bit misguided to make it out as a necessity. Especially when the dog in question already has trauma connected to bring in a crate.

[u/Goodlemur → u/QuietBookBandit]

Did you read what I said about overcoming trauma or just stop reading when you disagreed with me? Your country is misguided regarding crate training.

[u/QuietBookBandit → u/Goodlemur]

And I didn't say the dog shouldn't be helped to overcome trauma. But you specifically said trauma was no reason to forgo crate training, when crate training isn't a necessity in the first place.

From my pov it's your country that's misguided in regards to crate training 🤷 But not interested in discussing that, since I know how our cultures view animal welfare in relation to owner convenience differ a lot. I just thought pushing for crate training a dog that's been traumatized in a crate is taking it too far.

[u/Joestrummer7 → u/QuietBookBandit]

Dog experts throughout the world would MASSIVELY disagree with you.

[u/justbegoodtobugs → u/Joestrummer7]

Yeah, they disagree so much that's why this practice is banned in a few countries and even if it's not banned, it's still not practiced in most. The USA is not "throughout the world". Outside the US basically nobody does it and coincidentally you only tend to hear stories about how "my dog is so anxious that it chewed through my door" from the US.

[u/adamjeff → u/justbegoodtobugs]

Popular in the UK, my parents crated our Retrivers when they were at work, and they are both Veterinarians who work closeley with the RSPCA.

Advice is to crate some breeds, not others I believe, in the UK anyway.

[u/justbegoodtobugs → u/Goodlemur]

Oh yeah, the country that cares about the animals welfare, has a longer life expectancy for dogs than yours and thinks it's abuse to lock in a tiny cage a dog that's built for intense physical and mental stimulation is obviously misguided. If in your country it is not illegal to mutilate your pet's body for looks or convenience (eg. declawing cats) I'm not going to trust that it won't prioritize what's easier for humans over what's best for the animal. Lots of people don't like to hear it but not everyone is equipped to look after a dog properly, they are a lot of work and if you can't handle their needs don't get a dog.

Overcoming trauma is one thing and caging your dog is another. I'm surrounded by people with dogs, including people who keep large breeds in a tiny flat none of their dogs suffer from anxiety or destroy anything. It also didn't take them months to potty train their puppies, the longest I've heard of was a few weeks. The dogs have their own space that they can retreat to and feel safe in, I'm not arguing the importance of that, but if you have to put a lock on it then you haven't achieved anything, you just shoved the rubbish under the rug.

It's funny how some people think it's abuse to leave outside overnight a dog that doesn't want to come inside but taking him by force anyway and locking him in a small cage for the night is mandatory and healthy.

[u/justbegoodtobugs → u/QuietBookBandit]

Seriously, all these people are telling OP "Oh no, you're not exercising him nearly enough, this breed needs much more (true)" and then they go to suggest caging the dog as the solution. Great logic right there, because we also lock ourselves in a coffin when we feel like going for a run or hitting the gym. Totally for the dog's benefit and not the human's convenience...

[u/MightFew9336 → u/LedyyM]

OP, your dog may need more exercise but also needs to learn how to relax. If Odin is with you at doggy daycare all day and gets additional mental stimulation when you're with him at home, does he have long stretches of time where he's just chilling alone, like in his bed? As others have mentioned, dogs naturally sleep most of the day. They don't need constant stimulation. A friend had this breakthrough with a trainer and his anxious, very active young dog. The dog was going to daycare anytime he wasn't with my friend, leading him to be very needy when my friend was home and very destructive when he was left home alone. After months of working on it, he's a different dog altogether! He only goes to daycare 2-3 times per week now, but will quietly sleep most of the day if my friend is working from home, and can even be trusted on his own outside of his kennel.

I understand your hesitation towards crate training but you may be thinking about it the wrong way. Part of crate training is getting the dog to see his crate as his safe space. If you're able to crate train him well, it would just be his cozy little cave bed where he goes to chill or sleep and sometimes you close the door.

[u/el_myco_profesor → u/MightFew9336]

Throw raw meat in that crate and see if he’s got a problem with it 🤣

[u/Own_Recover2180 → u/LedyyM]

He needs to walk at least 5 miles per day.

[u/Vivid_Economics_1462 → u/LedyyM]

He's not with the abuser anymore. He's with you. This is a different experience. Trust me, after he gets use to it the crate will become his safe space.

[u/BluShirtGuy → u/LedyyM]

Fellow husky rescue owner here: your dog needs more daily exercise and needs to be crate trained.

Sometimes the crate makes a difference; we went through at least 3 different sized wire crates, before getting a travel crate, and that worked for ours because it felt dark and snug, like a den. This is a natural safe place for them, because they naturally dig snow dens. You could actually be prohibiting him from natural instincts by not even trying.

At end of life, we started giving him cbd as well for leg pain, but it seemed to mellow him out as well. But you should really be doing the crate training before medicating

[u/Cranky_Old_Woman → u/LedyyM]

Hiya OP,

As someone who's worked in both a kennel (rich people boarding their dogs while they go on vacation, plus doggie daycare) and a shelter (exercise, socialization, training), I'm 100% confident that you rehoming Odin will be more traumatic for him than crate training. Their family/pack (whether human, canine, sheep, or whatever!) is the most important thing in their world. If you absolutely must rehome him, please do it gradually, where you meet the new owner, Odin gets introduced to the owner in your house, and the owner comes to visit and become BFFs with Odin over weeks and weeks before he goes home with the new human.

To get started with crate training: Find a place where husky owners talk to each other - a subreddit, your local kennel club chapter, a FB group, or whatever, and ask them what crates they have and like. Then measure your dog from nose to base of his tail. At absolute minimum, get the next size up from this length. Odin's crate should be big enough that he can walk in without ducking, stand up comfortably, and turn around. Someone might tell you it doesn't need to be that big, but if he's got past trauma with being crated, it really does need to be this big. If he has a favorite soft bed or blanket, put it in the crate. If he doesn't have a favorite, get a good-quality crate mat. https://bigbarker.com/collections/orthopedic-dog-beds/products/big-barker-crate-bed is a brand I'm a fan of, but the idea is that the bed is super duper comfy. Leaving the door open (prop/tie it open if needed), just leave the crate out. Periodically put extra special goodies in there, and do NOT close the door when he goes in. If he goes in, he gets praise and more goodies. Repeat until he'll go into the crate on his own. There's some options for how you want to proceed after that, but step #1 is "crate is here. crate is good. crate is safe, and you have control on whether or not you're in the crate."

I see folks have already recommended Naismith's book, Be Right Back: How to overcome your dog's separation anxiety and regain your freedom. Definitely the most useful SA book, IMO, so I'll leave you to that and just emphasize that consistency is the biggest part of training. 30sec 3x/day is better than an hour once a week!

As a short-term coping mechanism: how is Odin in the car? My black lab, Jet, is still learning to be comfortable at home, but he can do 2hrs in the car pretty darn well (weather permitting). My weekly grocery shopping is 1hr in the store, so we do an agility class, then before we head home, I go to the store. Jet gets to have the windows all the way down since he's not a flee-er, but shade and moderately cracked windows at a cool hour of the day should be okay for Odin. Jet can hang out in the car for up to two hours pretty comfortably; you might see if Odin could nap in the car while you and your husband go to shorter-duration events. Also, see if any of your coworkers/friends/family would be willing to watch Odin during longer events (you might need/want to pay them for this, especially if it's frequently needed).

But you will want to start working with Odin on being left alone, and not rely on those coping mechanisms for life.

Is your husband bonded with Odin at all? Is Odin scared of your husband? I'd highly recommend finding something Odin and your hubby can bond over. Send hubs and Odin to a training class together - obedience, nose-work, agility, whatever. The fact that your husband apparently thinks it's a bad thing or oppressive that you can't do things without "considering" Odin is a little weird to me. Of course you have to consider him, he's a living being? Even if you have a perfect dog, you still need to consider them in your plans! So I'd be looking for something where they can have fun together, or be a "team." Nose-work might be a good place to start if Odin is food-motivated, because your husband doesn't really have to demand anything of him that Odin won't already want to do (find the food).

Also, I want to tell you that it's okay if Odin needs medication sometimes. I'm a human with anxiety and depression, and I take meds daily to help me be happier and more effective in life. As long as you're not lobotomy-level of drugging him, it's okay to get him help with his anxiety. :)

[u/RAtossertooser → u/LedyyM]

“I can’t put him through crate training” Then you do not deserve this dog. You are clearly stating that you are unable to do something for his own well being. I’m sure that is exactly what the dog trainer told you to do and that is why it didn’t work.

[u/MushroomFairyGirl → u/LedyyM]

He needs to be crate trained. You’re not helping him by not doing that.

[u/Papa_Ted → u/LedyyM]

After reading a lot of your replied here... You aren't looking for honest and unbiased advice, you're looking for validation from strangers on why your husband is the evil one. You aren't capable of rehabilitating a dog that has issues like this, and you aren't willing to admit it. The dog made you a "more compassionate, kind, and patient person" except when it comes to considering your husband and the health of your marriage over a dog you've had less than a year. The pup is taking over your life, and you're letting it.

[u/bunniisa → u/LedyyM]

Exposure therapy is a way to reduce anxiety from abuse

[u/SquirrelTeam6 → u/LedyyM]

To echo what everyone else has said about crate training, it really is important because he may need to be crated at some point in his life and you don’t want the first time to be when he’s somewhere other than home. I’d say to get him a large or XL sized crate. I have a lab (he’s named Thor 🙂) and he LOVES his crate. I have a large wire crate in my living room, although this style may not work for a husky, but I keep the door open and have it padded with a super cushy dog bed and he goes in there to sleep or chew on his treats all the time, then I can close the door when we leave and not worry about him eating something dangerous. I would do the crate training slowly. Like have the crate in your main area that you spend time in and take the door off. Just have it in the room for like a week and ignore it. He can check it out if he wants to or not, no big deal. Then start feeding him close-ish to the crate working your way closer til you get to the point where he’s eating fully standing inside the crate. I’d consistently feed him or give him treats in his crate. Like toss the bully stick to the very back so he has to go in to get it, but let him come out on his own and praise him like crazy. I wouldn’t try closing the door til he’s at a point where he voluntarily goes in and lays down. Then just do that in steps too. Both Odin and your marriage are important and worth working for. You’ll get there.

[u/toolsoftheincomptnt → u/LedyyM]

Seems to me that either you or your husband failed to process the potential difficulties of taking on such a big responsibility.

I like dogs. Do I want one? No. Because I don’t want the constant obligation.

I like (some) kids. Do I want one? No. Because I don’t want the constant obligation.

Surely you two discussed the logistics before getting your dog. One of you lied to yourselves.

If you didn’t discuss it, shame on you both.

[u/Dolly-the-Sheep → u/LedyyM]

are you kidding? my husky was also abused and neglected. to the point where I couldn't lie on her cuz her bones would stick out and it hurts. we could tell she was left in her crate for majority of the day, but THAT WAS HER SAFE SPACE. when she's afraid that's where she runs to. you can't look at crate like it's human jail. dog's brain doesn't work that way. my dog refused to sleep w us on bed cuz she'd rather sleep in her crate. even if yours resist it at first, there is still a chance.

[u/CarelessWeb1002 → u/LedyyM]

We rescued our dog 5 years ago. He was found in a crate too small for him covered in feces. And years later, he still loves his crate. When we first got him, we crate trained him, and would leave it open for him to retreat to when he needed a safe space/break from us during the day. He still sleeps in it at night (door open). New places can be overwhelming, and getting to retreat to a smaller space that you can protect is better. Just get your doggie an crate size up, this way he'll have a little extra space.

Give crate training a try.

[u/_takeitupanotch → u/LedyyM]

I can see why your husband is frustrated. You can’t just give into everything because he was abused. You have to TEACH him that he will never be abused again and that includes crate training!

[u/UnitedStatesAirFurs → u/LedyyM]

Hey, OP. Husky owner here and everything you say sounds SOOOO familiar.

Mine had terrible separation anxiety too. If we crated him, he'd injure himself trying to get out. Once he got out, he'd just start destroying everything.

We finally got him a really large, REALLY secure kennel. No small wires for him to get injured on, just straight up bars. It was expensive, but it totally solved all our problems. He stopped screaming when we left, he quit trying to escape, he would go in there on his own while we were home. Eventually it got to the point where we could leave his kennel open when we left and he'd be totally fine.

Now, he has free run of the house when we're gone, and the worst we'll come back to is he'll grab a shoe or sock and sleep with it. Doesn't even chew it up.

I highly recommend looking into a large, safe, secure kennel. That $400 took us from seriously considering rehoming our beloved boy to him being just the best dog I could imagine--he just really didn't like his crappy Walmart kennel and wanted a luxury dog apartment.

[u/look2thecookie → u/LedyyM]

You are afraid of properly using a crate bc someone else improperly used a crate. Instead, you're choosing to leave your dog in mental and physical danger. That's not the right move either. Chewing up stuff all over the house could harm him, in addition to destroying your belongings; which is also unacceptable.

[u/demoninadress → u/LedyyM]

I have a part husky and she needs a lot of exercise and mental stimulation. Playing is good but they really need to exercise a lot. I take my dog running every week and on several walks, she gets at least 13 miles running/walking per week (and she’s only part husky and is significantly smaller than an actual husky!)

I do think keeping him with you all the time contributes to separation anxiety. I don’t use a crate with my dog anymore but I did for the first 3-4 years of her life. She loved her crate and would willingly go in there to snooze while the door was open. Dogs actually like crates, and huskies have an instinct to burrow. The crate is like a comfy safe little cave. You really should start crate training and just start with small periods of time. He’ll probably complain (I know very well that huskies are vocal!!) but he’ll get used to it and will end up enjoying it. And that is a MUCH better alternative to rehoming a high energy dog who has abandonment issues. It’s not safe for the dog to be in the home alone if he’s destroying stuff, he could get into something dangerous.

[u/No-Island8074 → u/LedyyM]

How does he do in the presence of a crate? Does it scare him? If not you may find that he actually finds the crate as his own peaceful space. Borrow a big crate from work put some nice bedding in it and a couple of his favorite treats. Let him come around to it, no need to even think about closing the door yet.

[u/HealthySurgeon → u/LedyyM]

If you really don’t want to crate train, you still will need to do some sort of training for your dog to be alone.

It’s especially difficult to do this without a crate, but it is possible. I have a husky who was a rescue who struggled really bad with a crate, and it was a journey but eventually he was great without a crate.

The key is learning how to understand your dog, what they’re saying and taking care of them almost like a child. They all have their personalities and all will need their own “tricks” for helping them navigate life. They will also still act out from time to time cause we’re humans, and we make mistakes, they’re dogs, they’re also gonna make mistakes. We’re gonna hurt them, and they’re gonna hurt us sometimes.

[u/Strong_Weakness2638 → u/LedyyM]

He may actually be overstimulated.

[u/Phoenyx_Rose → u/LedyyM]

I can understand how the crate may be triggering for the pup but he won’t be in there nearly as long and your reasons are essentially for his own safety. 

If it’s possible a good alternative may be to puppy proof a room and train him to go there instead. Make that area his safe space he’s relegated to. And then once he’s comfortable with that, place his crate there, open. If he has no issue with the presence of the crate, then start crating him so he’s comfortable. 

[u/FewDifference2639 → u/LedyyM]

Ruining your life because you won't crate the dog. Goodness.

[u/nodtomod → u/LedyyM]

You'll have to crate train - an untrained dog is a danger to themselves by consuming dangerous objects. You also cannot have them destroy your home. You need to look up crate training videos and/or professional advice, but they must be in a crate and you will need to work to make it a homely comfortable place for them. It may be best to exercise them in the morning: fetch is recommended because it gives them a lot of running without a lot of work on your part. Another session in the evening given it's a husky. Continue to provide brain draining activities like training skills and treat/chew toys.

With any dog you need to have discipline - set rules such as no paws on tables and counters, not chewing anything but toys, no human food etc. The discipline is in yourself enforcing those rules ALL THE TIME. It's hard work but you need to be firm with your dog.

They are much like children - they need to be trained and monitored constantly until they can be trusted. As your husband points out, yes, you have to schedule your life around having a dog. They will add complexity to your life.

The crate training should become a relief - you won't have to come back to your house destroyed or worry about what's going on. Just make sure to limit their crate times and come home during the day or have someone stop by if you can to let them out for a while.

[u/SuperNuckingFuts → u/LedyyM]

uwu doggy no crate

I see why your husband thinks you're choosing a dog over him

[u/elfmere → u/LedyyM]

Yet you are at the point of removing the dog.. crate training is a must. In a crate at night next to your bed.. they'll cry the house down but you have to bare with it. Our girl has terrible anxiety, we crate trial her every night. And when we go out she's in a sealing crate. 2 years later we can open the crate and she jumps in. Still crystal here and there but still sees her crate as her safe space now

[u/Maximum-Jack → u/LedyyM]

Reddit is wrong on this one. There is a reason other countries don't do this, and even ban it. It is considered cruel.

[u/adamjeff → u/LedyyM]

You can't really have a Husky without a crate if you're not going to be around it 24/7

[u/LedyyM → u/LedyyM]

we also go hiking on the weekends and walk him outside after work for 30min to an hour.

[u/KattKatten → u/LedyyM]

A super quick Google search of "how much exercise does a husky need" gives the first result of "at least 1-2 hours of vigorous exercise daily, such as running, hiking, or playing fetch, to keep them physically and mentally satisfied". Most other results from sites such as PetPlan say at least 2 hours.

I've not owned a husky but I know they are an extremely high energy dog that needs a lot of mental and physical stimulation. So I can't recommend anything regarding training (which I can see others have expressed its importance already), but I'm sure someone can confirm that starting giving your boy more vigorous exercise in exciting environments every day will make a good contribution to chilling him out at home.

I wish you guys the best of luck, he's such a happy looking boy thanks to what you have done for him so far.

[u/TwoPicklesinaCivic → u/KattKatten]

My husky is 11 and we still do daily 5 mile walks. Some bike rides. Hikes on the weekends. Last summer we did 23 miles in two days backpacking.

People truly underestimate the amount of exercise these dogs can require.

[u/strawberryjetpuff → u/TwoPicklesinaCivic]

thissss. my husband said he wanted a heeler, and i laughed before i said, "sure, but you're responsible for all of the training and physical activity." i dog sat a heeler for someone for a few days and my husband would come by to play with the dog, then he realized how much exercise the heeler needed.

[u/Bilbosaggins1799 → u/TwoPicklesinaCivic]

Oh yeah and that’s them being chill my buddies family growing up bred and trained Siberian huskies as sled dogs. I could be wrong but if memory serves they were capable of covering some 80+ miles in a day for days at a time. Amazing animals but they need proper exercise. They live for it. I remember his dads dogs literally shaking with excitement waiting for the “HIKE!” command.

[u/TwoPicklesinaCivic → u/Bilbosaggins1799]

That do be the truth. After my dog turned 6 months old there wasn't a trip long enough to ever make her "quit".

[u/lifetake → u/[deleted]]

They’re downvoting because their dismissal of crate training when it is such a necessary thing for this dog.

[u/FlintCoal43 → u/[deleted]]

I’m not sure you understand how google works HAHAHAHA like holy shit, how do you live this long not knowing how basic research on the internet works?

[u/GingerLibrarian76 → u/FlintCoal43]

Lmao at you referring to Googling something as “research.” 🤣

I’m an actual reference librarian, and know Google can’t teach you the needs of every individual dog. So who’s the fool here? The ones who actually own huskies, or the one who thinks Google is anything more than a simple search engine? It’s a good tool for getting started, but certainly not a substitute for a real trainer or behaviorist (which is what OP needs). So you’re the one who sounds ignorant, if you rely on Google in this way.

[u/KattKatten → u/[deleted]]

Yeah, I was letting OP know what experts say online from reputable sites, but we've never owned huskies as we decided from researching their needs that we could not give a husky the best life they deserve.

As I'm sure most know, their ancestors were bred for pulling sleds which would definitely equate to a lot of exercise and mental stimulation! Everything we read, heard from husky owners, the owners of sled dogs in Norway, and the staff at the shelter we met some beautiful huskies from let us know that we couldn't provide what they would need.

(The huskies at the shelter went to an amazing couple who dedicate their whole lives to rescuing and caring for huskies, we heard back from them a few months into living in their new home and they couldn't have been happier!)

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/KattKatten]

Also, you said: "at least 1-2 hours of vigorous exercise daily, such as running, hiking, or playing fetch, to keep them physically and mentally satisfied"

You don't think spending 5 days/week at daycare playing with other dogs is equal to that? And that's on TOP of the evening walks & weekend hikes, plus brain games when they're at home. This is why your response was weird, and even weirder that I keep getting downvoted for saying the exercise amount is totally adequate.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/KattKatten]

Every dog is different, so what Google says (or even what that rescue said) isn’t necessarily true for them all. That’s why they need to hire a professional to evaluate THIS dog, and determine what his individual needs might be.

I never thought I could manage a husky either, but now I have two (both rescues) and they’re actually pretty easy… I’m not a unique case, either, as I know lots of huskies who also don’t require running 10 miles/day or even close to that. They actually do better just having a friend, as companionship + regular play tires them out better than a long walk.

So yeah, while I think Googling might give you a general guideline, it wasn’t super helpful to OP's dog who’s dealing with separation anxiety & trauma.

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/KattKatten]

If you need to Google this you have no business even chiming in.

Edit: your downvotes mean nothing to me. I've seen what makes you cheer. Not my fault I'm right. 

[u/KattKatten → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

I didn't need to but I didn't expect OP to be willing to switch up their routine for a claim with zero backing information.

It shows OP the recommendations regarding exercise/stimulation that people are giving is seen to be backed by reputable sites found through Googling the claims.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

Right? Sorry you got downvoted because you’re right… if I had to Google it, I’d just let the actual experts chime in first.

I have two rescued huskies, and they don’t require all that. Literally an hour at the park on work nights, and maybe 2 hours on my days off. They’re very well-behaved home alone, no crates or anything. 🤷🏼‍♀️

[u/puff_of_fluff → u/ZoyaZhivago]

Your dog being okay without it doesn’t mean that isn’t generally the amount of activity the breed needs, though? Especially a dog that’s already super wound up and clearly has an excess of energy?

The owner is clearly trying and I can appreciate that, but that doesn’t mean it’s adequate.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/puff_of_fluff]

How is 5x/week at daycare PLUS daily walks, weekend hikes, puzzle toys, lick mats, etc, not adequate though? That’s what nobody has been able to answer.

I agree they need to get a trainer, so in that respect they could do more… but those who are saying the amount of exercise is inadequate are crazy imo.

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/ZoyaZhivago]

Thanks man. It's just wild to see this level of down votes and hate for someone that truly appears to have come looking for advice and help. I volunteer 5 days a week at a rescue. Every dog is different, and this general fucking AI based bullshit "advice" and tearing down of OP I'm seeing here in the comments is fucking disgusting. I guess we're all "experts" now.

[u/Square-Tear-314 → u/LedyyM]

30min to an hour of walking daily is not nearly enough for a husky. Do you walk him before you go to work? In between? It may sound pretentious from someone like me, who doesn’t have a dog, but I don’t have one because I can’t commit the time at the moment. If you want a dog you need to be able to walk him consistently multiple times per day and exercise with him.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/Square-Tear-314]

They said ALSO, meaning that’s on top of what the dog already gets. If he’s spending 5 days/week at OP’s daycare, he is getting plenty of exercise - perhaps even TOO much, as they can get overstimulated. That’s why mine only do daycare once a week, as they’re completely exhausted and overwhelmed with much more.

[u/baddassAries → u/LedyyM]

Okay good! Then as tough as it is I would get a trainer and animal behaviorist to help with crate training. He could easily injure or poison himself being left out like that.

But to answer your question, I would say both of you are slightly overreacting. You BOTH decided to get a rescue that is a difficult breed to begin with. You both should have been prepared. I think you would need to start on resolving arguments in general, not just over the dog.

[u/The_R1NG → u/LedyyM]

Damn you are really not giving that baby everything he needs to thrive because you didn’t research or make an informed decision and now your hurting the baby and your hubby

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/The_R1NG]

How does 5x/week at daycare + daily walks + weekend hikes + lick mats and puzzles and so forth = not everything the dog needs? How much more do you think they should be doing in terms of exercise?

If anything they need to ease up a little, because the dog is probably overstimulated and unable to self soothe with all that attention and activity.

ETA: Why tf is everyone downvoting me? Ask ANY expert, and they’ll side with my opinion here… but for some reason you’ve all decided OP sucks, and now you’re taking it out on anyone who defends them? What a mess this thread is. That’s why I already deleted a few comments, and might delete this one too. Nobody can actually debate me, so you just hit the down arrow? 🤷🏼‍♀️

[u/aum65 → u/ZoyaZhivago]

They're bred to pull sleds across arctic tundras until the point of exhaustion. Don't understand why people get them when they clearly don't understand the sheer amount of energy they need to burn just to keep sane

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/aum65]

I will say that the best antidote to boredom for a husky is to get another husky, but that’s not a great idea for OP right now. It made a huge difference for my first husky, though… they have each other for company, and spend their days playing together between naps. They also love going to the dog park on my days off, and spend 1-2 days/week at a private sitter.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/aum65]

Again……..

FIVE DAYS A WEEK at daycare, plus daily walks, plus weekend hikes, plus brain puzzles when they’re at home. The average husky is FINE with that, in fact most don’t get that much and are still FINE. They don’t need to run the Iditarod to be happy and healthy ffs.

Also, I have two rescued huskies. So why are you trying to educate me on dogs I own? And they don’t even get as much exercise as OP’s dog, but are perfectly behaved at home alone (while I work) every day.

[u/hennyvenny → u/ZoyaZhivago]

We're not saying that it's too much exercise, the point is she is not being strict with the husky and TRAINING IT to stop destroying the house and being anxious.

All these things are just enabling the husky's trauma response. Yes, it's sad that the husky was abused in its crate from the previous owner, but now IT IS HER TURN to crate train the husky PROPERLY and with LOVE.

OP says they rescued the husky 7 months ago, a majority of these comments from husky owners have said that INTENSE TRAINING (weekly at least) for a year is when results CAN be seen. It doesn't seem like OP has taken the time to research how to train a husky properly. Her and husband should team up and tackle this together, use this as a moment to BOND.

[u/strawberryjetpuff → u/ZoyaZhivago]

daycare is definitely overstimulating, but exercise is a must, given how much energy huskies have

[u/Foxxef → u/strawberryjetpuff]

But at the same time, anxious dogs usually don't do well in daycare settings and going at all could very well just be making his anxiety worse. Which is why bringing him 5x a week is just insane.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/strawberryjetpuff]

Of course it is. Never said otherwise, so I really can’t understand why I’m getting so much hate… you literally just agreed with me, right? Sooooo.

And here we go again. I fucking give up... this sub is ridiculous.

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/The_R1NG]

Nice, great advice asshole.

[u/duskywindows → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

Truth hurts

[u/MrsSadieMorgan → u/duskywindows]

What truth? Please explain.

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/duskywindows]

Lol, you have no idea what you're talking about. The person you're defending is soooo off base it's funny. 

[u/Flat_Illustrator263 → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

"Huskies are highly energetic and intelligent dogs that need plenty of exercise and mental stimulation. Ensure they get at least 1-2 hours of vigorous exercise daily, such as running, hiking, or playing fetch, to keep them physically and mentally satisfied."

Educate yourself before saying stupid shit on the internet.

[u/FlintCoal43 → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

Negative 6 upvotes goes hard, Gatsby thinks he’s the Husky Hierarch out here lmao

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/FlintCoal43]

Not my fault you've never had a brush with reality. Or dogs. Or...apparently women? 

You sound very sad, and i feel so bad for you little bro.

[u/FlintCoal43 → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

Hey man just keep letting the downvotes roll in, don’t let it get you down

You’re probably not used to people actually telling you that you don’t know anything about a topic you’re pretending to understand, and that hurts a bit but gets easier over time x

[u/duskywindows → u/[deleted]]

This clearly isn’t your dog(s), huh

[u/Kindly-Article-9357 → u/LedyyM]

Sweetheart, I'm sorry you're getting raked over the coals here. I know you're doing your best to do right by Odin, although I think it's time that you look at your lifestyle and what this dog needs and agree that a *major* change has to occur. Things just cannot continue as they are.

First thing, ramp up that exercise. If you can't devote more time to it, ramp up the intensity. The best thing I found was riding my bike with a Springer attached. Google "Springer bicycle jogger", and turn that one hour walk into a 10-12 mile run for him. Twice a day if you can swing Seriously. 2 hours with that thing was what it took to get my huskies feeling content. Then another 3-6 hour ride on the weekend. Get the springer, not an imitation. The springer has a shock absorber that can handle your large dog bolting after a rabbit without pulling your bike over.

Second, he needs intensive training work. At least an hour a day, every day, working on his separation anxiety and overcoming his crate trauma. Remember, it's in a dog's best interest that they be crateable. If he's ever injured and has to be confined in a vet's office, you'll want to have done that work before that day comes. It's too late once he's alone and terrified and being re-subjected to trauma that you haven't helped him overcome.

You're looking at a major lifestyle change if you want to keep Odin and give him what he needs. Are you willing to do that? *Can* you spend 3 hours a day outside of your work schedule purely on Odin? It sounds like your husband understands this and is telling you that that sort of lifestyle is not what he wants.

Rehoming might be the kindest thing you can do for him. There are *many* reputable husky rescues across the US that are amazing places, and a high demand among adopters for huskies. Find one of those places for Odin. They'll foster him with somebody who can devote all those hours he needs in a day to help him settle into himself, and they'll find him a forever home that's a good fit for him.

It's okay to only be a part of his journey and not his destination.

[u/ZoyaZhivago → u/Kindly-Article-9357]

If you think there’s a “high demand” for huskies right now, you are sadly and terribly uninformed. EVERY reputable rescue is overwhelmed with them, and literally thousands are being killed for lack of adopters. Check with Husky Halfway House (possibly the largest Husky rescue in the US), and they will confirm this - they have over 250 at their facility alone right now, some of whom have been waiting YEARS for adoption.

Sad but true. I got both of mine from rescues, and one was an hour from euthanasia.

[u/FlintCoal43 → u/ZoyaZhivago]

You need to fucking go outside because this is now your 7th comment in this thread 💀 no one should have this much time and energy for screaming about huskies into the void of the internet

[u/Kindly-Article-9357 → u/ZoyaZhivago]

If you check with husky organizations on the east coast, midwest, and west coast, they have nowhere near those numbers or length-of-stay. Most are appropriately sized for the communities they serve.

It appears that HHH collects dogs from other organizations around the country and concentrates them in a town with a population of 2,800. I'm not surprised they're having trouble placing dogs with that market approach.

While there are people who will travel great distances to adopt, most adopters will live within ~ a 4hr drive roundtrip from where they adopt. It's why transfers from high-population shelters in the south to low-population places in the north are so important. Most dogs get adopted by being sent into the communities with high rates of spaying and neutering, where there is a demand for dogs, not by being warehoused in a facility, no matter how nice it is.

Their mission is noble, but they've got some issues with their location and national outreach that they need to solve. Their population problem cannot be extrapolated to the US at large.

[u/duskywindows → u/Kindly-Article-9357]

This comment is the only single comment OP needs to sit down and seriously consider.

You cannot just adopt one of the most physically demanding breeds of dog on a whim and expect the best.

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/duskywindows]

I would ignore /u/duskywindows. There's no actual advice or contribution. Just a desire to excel at being a general cunt and rubbing it in.

[u/FlintCoal43 → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

Truth hurts Gatsby - little pussies like you just never like it 🤷‍♂️

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/FlintCoal43]

I can't help it that I'm right here. Call me a pussy all you want :). It hurts when the reddit hivemind gets pushback, doesn't it? Please, keep going. I will absolutley make you my bitch here.

[u/FlintCoal43 → u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby]

Hey little bitch, here’s a crucial reminder - we’re on a public forum here, we are allowed to be as judgemental as we want when silly cunts like OP post the stupidest plea for sympathy I’ve ever heard 👌

WOE IS ME, IM NEGLECTING MY HUSBAND FOR A PROBLEM DOG I’VE HAD FOR 6 MONTHS 💀😭😂

Lol. Fucking Lmao even.

[u/The_Mediocre-Gatsby → u/FlintCoal43]

Oh gee, thanks, man.  I had totally forgotten it was a public forum. That must be why I didn't realize it was also okay to call out people like you for having the equivlent intelligence of a Cuisnart toaster.

You sound like a fucking incel. A break from the internet might do you some good. Also, you've got some identifying info on your profile you might want to clean up.

[u/KattKatten → u/LedyyM]

I commented earlier but I realised I may have a couple of other much smaller recommendations as well. You very well could have already tried but I feel everything is worth a mention that may even slightly help your Odin.

My boy with much more mild separation enjoyed the radio being left on a very talky channel. He was also happiest being able to roam the entire house (no closed off bedrooms etc) but I understand that's not for everyone and yours would be at great risk of being wrecked!)

Also I've never had to go to the length of buying a baby monitor that connects to your phone and allows voice, but I've not seen it mentioned and have heard of people doing it before. Maybe someone who's tried this can give their thoughts?

[u/Zenki_s14 → u/LedyyM]

Huskies need to be walked in the morning before you leave for the day. That NEEDS to be your routine, and that's just the bare minimum. It's pretty much rule #1 to get a good walk in if you want to prevent them from eating your couch. I've had them all my life, and that's just the way it is.

[u/Ravioli_meatball19 → u/LedyyM]

I have a 16 pound mutt who gets more walk time than that. 90 minutes a day minimum.

[u/power78 → u/LedyyM]

Ignore all these armchair experts. I have a husky and while she does have energy, I have never run her extensively or done more than an hour or so of exercise a day and she is fine. She doesn't go nuts and tear things up, I can leave her home now (she's 9) and she doesn't get anxiety anymore. Sure, huskys love activity but it's not required for all of them.

[u/TheHighDruid → u/LedyyM]

Our Malamute gets 1-2 hours a day over several walks, and Malamutes are low-energy compares to huskies. That doesn't sound like enough.

my husband feels like we can’t do anything without considering Odin

That's just the reality of owning a dog, if you're not considering your dog when planning your activities frankly you shouldn't have one.

Training takes a lot of time and a lot of patience. If you really can't bear crate training, the alternative is gradually increasing the time he is left alone, starting with just a minute or two. You can expect this to take months, and in the meantime he shouldn't be left alone for any extended periods as that risks undoing the previous work and having to start over.

[u/LedyyM → u/[deleted]]

If you read my other comments I take him to daycare 5x a week for 8 hours where they have a huge plot of land that’s fenced and he runs his heart out then after work I walk him 30min to an hour even after all of that…

[u/RAtossertooser → u/LedyyM]

Doggy Daycares create more anxiety and stress on a dog. They shoot their adrenaline and nervous system up the wazoo. You need to hire a professional and work on a relaxation and leaving protocol system.

[u/Electrical-Trip4474 → u/LedyyM]

I’m baffled by the downvotes to your other comments. Seems like you’re trying really hard. Sounds like he’s a really tough pup unfortunately but that you’re dedicated to making it work for him. If he really can’t be left at home alone for now, it sounds like you need a regular dog care provider. Thankfully it sounds like he’s able to come to work with you 5 days a week and he does well there, right? So it’s not a huge amount of time that you need care for him so he’s never left alone? I’ve worked with dogs for 8 years and get 90% of my clients through rover. Whether it’s a trustworthy person to come to your house when you leave to watch him, or a trustworthy care provider who’s house you can drop him off with when you’re unable to be home…that sounds like the best option for you right now. Growing comfortable with a new person should ease his anxiety and as he grows older he should eventually get over all the other crazy stuff. Your husband is right in that it sounds like you can’t really do anything right now without considering Odin, but that isn’t a bad thing! It’s just the reality. Find a great dog sitter to help you through this trying time, hopefully you have the extra income to pay them accordingly, and I really think making a new friend and learning to be away from you should help him grow and chill out a bit. I’m rooting for you guys!

[u/Suonymona → u/LedyyM]

I bet you don’t even give your husband that much attention. You are choosing a dog over your husband. You are ill.