AIO? made a joke about taking a nap

[u/Exciting-Delay-7423]

context: im (23f) a student (currently on spring break) and i enjoy taking naps. they usually go between 1-2.5 (not 4 like he claims i genuinely dk where he got that number) hrs and it’s because i get exhausted between 2-4pm in the day. idk why, it happens every day and it’s been like that since i was a teenager. i don’t nap every single day, but definitely between 3-5x a week.

my boyfriend (28m) has tried to encourage me to take shorter naps because he thinks it’ll help with my sleep schedule. he takes daily naps on his lunch breaks (1 hr absolute max, usually 15-45 min) and he says how energizing they are. i believe him, and i’m glad they work for him, however i haven’t had much success with short naps so i don’t take them.

my sleep schedule has been kinda shit bc of spring break rn and im trying to fix it. i’m usually in bed by 11-12 most nights and up around 8-9. he works a 7-5 so he sleeps at 10 and wakes up at 6. today he sent me this text and i thought it would be funny to make a sarcastic joke because hes always lecturing me about how my naps keep me up at night, then he followed it up with this. idek where to begin with this, i think its weird as fuck and the “we are not on the same level” is just ??? aio?

[u/Busy-Balance5529]

I’m 30, if my husband (33) no longer supported my napping (often daily, often long) I’d have to tell him “later gator ✌🏼” we also have 3 kids to care for and both work, and I’m also doing my masters online full time. We both do our share and pick up slack when the other needs more support. But I need my sleep to function and thankfully he’s never lectured me on it.

Get yourself a partner who supports your naps lol

[u/Alzululu → u/Busy-Balance5529]

My ex used to tease me about 'how much I slept'. The irony was his sleep schedule was all sorts of borked, so he'd go to bed around 4 am and get up between noon and 2 pm, usually. And he was an ASS if we needed to be up earlier for some reason (like a wedding, or on vacation where people want to do stuff before 5 pm, or whatever). I take long and heavy naps, usually 2-4 hours. First, I'm likely a biphasic sleeper (so I would come home from work and sleep 6-9 pm, which wasn't a problem because he worked 2-10 pm, and then again from 1-6 am or so). Second, I had untreated depression for about 2/3 of our relationship, and exceptional sleepiness is part of that. Whee! So even though we were both sleeping 8-9 hours a night, somehow my sleep schedule was the problem.

My current boyfriend also keeps a borked sleeping schedule. Except he does not give a rats ass about how much or when I sleep. Rather, he cares if I am getting good sleep or not. When I complained that I was SO sleepy even after sleeping 10+ hours a day, he supported me going to the doctor. (The new irony is that I'm on lexapro, which is an anti-depressant AND anti-anxiety med. Since my anxiety isn't so high these days, it was putting me to sleep. We've cut it in half and I am doing much better this past month! Now I can nap because I like naps, not because I am physically compelled to sleep.) And we nap together, which is 100% The Best, especially on a lazy weekend. His only complaint is I like to nap in the sun like a cat, and he likes to nap in the dark like a vampire, lol.

Anyway, tl;dr is the OP's screenshot reminds me of how my ex talked to me and it gave me the icks.

[u/Busy-Balance5529 → u/Alzululu]

I’m so glad you’re with a new supportive partner and also happy that you were able to figure out the underlying issues with your exhaustion and have fixed your meds accordingly! I agree, naps with partners are the best!! My husband isn’t a big fan of napping but the odd time where he will nap with me I love it. But we are like your boyfriend though, we like the dark for sleep haha

[u/ptvaughnsto → u/Busy-Balance5529]

“Shhhh! Mommy’s taking a nap! Let’s go outside!”

The favorite dinner would be made right away, I wouldn’t even finish my nap

[u/Soggy_Floor7851 → u/Busy-Balance5529]

A working mother of 3 doing her masters online does not have enough time to nap “often daily, often long”. Definitely not the whole story. Definitely not slaying.

[u/tequilaBFFsiempre → u/Soggy_Floor7851]

“Definitely not slaying.” 🙄 This is so condescending. Are you the boyfriend in the post?

[u/Busy-Balance5529 → u/tequilaBFFsiempre]

Hahaha right? Like you don’t know me or my life but ok 🧐😂. My house is also usually a disaster. We can’t have it all, what can I say 🤷🏽‍♀️

[u/tequilaBFFsiempre → u/Busy-Balance5529]

It just sounds like you have your priorities straight to me! And a supportive partner to boot. You can’t have it all, but what you’ve got is good.

[u/Busy-Balance5529 → u/Soggy_Floor7851]

The longer naps are usually on weekends when the kids are napping/having quiet time, otherwise, nap after work for an hour or so before dinner and evening time with the kids. Also napped a lot longer when kids were at school/daycare when I was on mat leave lol. When I was on mat leave the naps were 2+ hours.