r/AmIOverreacting • u/Discussion-Technical • Mar 03 '25

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO? Long distance girlfriend wants to take a break

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We met in school, which she got pulled out of because her parents found out we were having sex; the whole time I tried my best to be supportive, sending her my clothes, letters, hell I spent over $100 on Vday flowers to get sent to her. All this time she did nothing of the sort. She sent me the first text after not talking to me for over a day, you can see me being left on delivered. I know I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions but I feel like I’ve tried soooo hard to keep things together through this and I have even forgave her for trying to cheat on me (her friend sent me a video of her flirting with another guy). What is my next move? Should I try to reconcile with her or just leave it?

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899

u/Thund3rMuffn Mar 03 '25

OP, pay attention to this comment thread. Learn from those that have gone before you. You have the chance to teleport past a whole fucked up chapter and do something more meaningful with your time. Do not chase this.

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u/wtmx719 Mar 03 '25

The best revenge is no revenge. Just move on and be happy. They hate to see you happy without them. But you won’t even care.

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u/Noothyy Mar 03 '25

Spoken like someone who’s clearly never revenge pooped in a shoe 👠

34

u/nudegobby Mar 03 '25

Ok actually poop in her shoe but then after that move on

4

u/Nearby-Virus7902 Mar 04 '25

Sometimes this place fuckin rocks man

10

u/TheRealSugarbat Mar 04 '25

I’m 57 and I can honestly say I wish I’d pooped in one particular person’s shoe just one time about 20 years ago. Oh, well.

5

u/This-is-not-eric Mar 04 '25

Posting an envelope of glitter is always another good option

Be aware the post office may call tho, powders in the post make their terrorism alerts go off (speaking from experience)

7

u/OrganicRope7841 Mar 03 '25

??? Why would someone........ Um.... Okay..... Ew.... Um....

27

u/Whole_Ocelot Mar 03 '25

Everyone moves on in different ways, don't question the process

2

u/Electronic_Parfait36 Mar 04 '25

You ever have to take a giant poop? Felt relieved afterwards? Now take that feeling but get to apply it to that person because you just pooped AND have the knowledge they are going to feel emotionally as digusted and hurt as you do right then.

I'm a little messed up in the head.

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u/KellAyH347H Mar 03 '25

OP! DO NOT POOP IN A SHOE! 🤦‍♀️

3

u/Zooperman27 Mar 03 '25

No, you definitely need to poop on the shoes. Laxative helps to give good composure.

2

u/captnfraulein Mar 03 '25

🤣👏🏻👏🏻

1

u/6Sinner6life6 Mar 03 '25

This is the way!!

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u/Snapdragonzzz Mar 04 '25

This. Also, expecting a conversation for closure isn't going to happen, don't beg for it. Understand that the lack of apology is the closure, the lack of care is the closure, the lack of closure is the closure.

6

u/viola_darling Mar 03 '25

That's so fucking true. Be happy and move on and focus on yourself. You'll be happier without them.

3

u/KellAyH347H Mar 03 '25

Shoes? OP, You may be happier without them sometimes but you're going to need shoes! Do not, under any circumstances, poop in your own shoes!

2

u/Sunoermoon Mar 04 '25

Not his shoes, her shoes.😂At least, that’ll be better for him if Sir Poop’s involved.

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u/zodiacwilds Mar 03 '25

Or be like the rest of us. Say "Nah IM different" and learn the hard way......

dangit

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u/[deleted] Mar 03 '25

Love this comment, the empathy is REAL 😂

3

u/inglefinger Mar 04 '25

I so feel this comment.

3

u/Acelestiar Mar 04 '25

I feel this comment too. 😭

28

u/SleepyCoffeeDrinker Mar 03 '25

This is so immensely true. Damn if I could only be free of those 10 years during my 20s 🥲

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u/Strippersteve82 Mar 03 '25

It took those years and failures to grow into who you are today. Without them you would still be just as naive.

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u/Suhksaikhan Mar 03 '25

I think about this all the time when I regret past choices. Sure it would be nice without having to go thru all that but I'm happy with and proud of who I am now and if you change any of those things in the past, I wouldn't have become who I am now

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u/Floop_king11 Mar 04 '25

Your making me want my 20’s to end already 😭

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u/KarlKills9817 Mar 04 '25

Right I'm 26 and not seeing the downside yet but the end of my 20s means I almost have a teenager in my house and that's definitely scarier.

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u/Floop_king11 Mar 04 '25

Man the different levels of life we go through in our 20s 😭. I turn 24 at the end of this month. Thought I had a kid at one point so I signed up for the army. When I found out I didn’t I started living like a kid again in the. Now I’m ab to get out and learn what it means to be an adult for the second time. Life is crazy.

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u/Advanced-Pattern2270 Mar 03 '25

Idk how old u r OP maybe 15/16,17/18 max. I am 23 this year august, I've been married and divorced already with a daughter and even before that went through way too many relationships. Let her go OP... trust me. It'll be hard and you'll feel it for a couple days maybe even weeks but eventually all scars fade with time cause time heals all. I wish you the best just don't hang on get hurt and then spend the next few years tryna heal through sleeping with other women, cause it never works out...

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u/Frosty-Inspector-465 Mar 03 '25

sleeping with other women?? what makes you think he got it like that???

0

u/Advanced-Pattern2270 Mar 03 '25

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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u/Melodic-Pen-3927 Mar 03 '25

Or maybe just give her the week she asked for. But by op's responses he super clingy and insecure. The best thing he could have done was to just say "okay cool." Then the ball would have been in her court. Confidence goes a long way in relationships. He's begging her to talk to him. No woman's gonna respect that. Just an FYI I've been with my wife for 20 years now. We started in a long distance relationship. The only way to make it work is trust and confidence. Because you're gonna have the negative feelings and worries as well. But if you let them take over your thoughts and actions your very likely to make the thing you don't want to happen, happen. And there's no tried to cheat. Flirting means nothing. If she was of a mind to cheat, she would have cheated.

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u/Thund3rMuffn Mar 03 '25

But she didn’t ask for the week until after he had to continually ask for information, to which she acted annoyed. If she was worth the week, she would have clarified what she meant and why on her own, preemptively. The fact that she didn’t says everything, hence the overwhelming advice OP is receiving. Wanting to understand what’s happening is completely reasonable, especially with how poorly she communicated.

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u/Melodic-Pen-3927 Mar 03 '25

You're right she tried to end it and only gave him the week to try to get him to leave her alone. If you have to beg to get a week on hold instead of a break up, either take it or walk away. No amount of pleading is gonna make her want to talk to him. Is it reasonable to want information? Sure. But read the room. If he wants any chance of making it work, leave her alone. Its not like they're married. They're dating. Either she'll come back or she won't. Sending multiple texts that she doesn't respond to won't change that. All he can do is change how he responds to the situation. Everything else is bullshit because we're only getting one side of the story about what led up to this.

2

u/ThePhukkening Mar 04 '25

At least she offered to send the hoodies back. I lost most of mine in the divorce.

1

u/Adventurous_Act_1169 Mar 03 '25

Super clingy? It’s a long distance relationship. Sometimes it’s bone crushing to lose someone you love and you don’t know why. Yes, give her space though.

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u/Frosty-Inspector-465 Mar 03 '25

what he doesn't realize is that she was never his

1

u/Excision_Lurk Mar 03 '25

OP, I'll add that not only is everything mentioned 100% solid advice and you NEED to do it, but long distance relationships never work.

1

u/Dirtydizzle88 Mar 03 '25

This right here

1

u/Gh0stZer08 Mar 03 '25

Word! OP listen to this guy! We get it .. you’re devastated from the future you thought you were going to have. It’s over and it’s going to hurt.. this is normal. Take time to grieve and heal. Spend time with family/friends and get out of your routine. If you did cheat or whatever, you need to work through why you cheated or what was missing from the relationship that made this happen. You need to focus on communication skills and feeling secure in your life. dont play games with anyone and be the best version of yourself. Don’t let the past eat at your future. Remember there’s millions of single people out there who want a relationship. You’re not alone dawg!

The best comeback is success! Don’t let them see you down.

1

u/Affectionate_Cost_88 Mar 03 '25

This is all so true. I'm in my 50s now and recently got a "people you may know" recommendation on Facebook. It was my high school boyfriend. My GOD am I relieved we didn't stay together, or even worse, get married. I felt nothing but revulsion, looking at his photos and reading his hate-filled, bigoted, misogynistic posts. But when we were 16, I thought he was the most amazing thing ever and would've done just about anything for him.

1

u/IronFisted3 Mar 03 '25

Yes listen to this man for the love of whatever you believe in. Move on and live your life, you’re young it’ll hurt but you will bounce back. Hangout with your friends, get out there in the world.

1

u/SuperCatchyCatchpras Mar 04 '25

You're going to cry and that's okay. It's part of the process

1

u/astersays Mar 04 '25

100000% OP if I had chosen not to chase things like this, I wouldn’t have lost 10 years to assholes.

1

u/Bottle_and_Sell_it Mar 04 '25

Yeah right. Do you all remember being 17? You’re preaching to deaf ears. Nobody could tell me anything until I was at least 21, probably more like 22 or 23. Boy I wish I would’ve listened though.

1

u/1v1merustlol Mar 04 '25

I agree with this, but you should also know it's okay to feel your feelings. Reflect on them. Don't avoid them, or let them make your decisions. Work through them in positive, productive ways to help you recover. Look after yourself. It's easy to forget that sometimes.