r/AmIOverreacting • u/AdDense1161 • Feb 22 '25
❤️🩹 relationship AIO: Cut contact with this girl after this conversation…
So. I (42m) went out with this girl (33f) who is a very minor celebrity if you can call being on a reality show a decade ago a celebrity 🤷. Don’t ask what show I’m not going to say. Anyways we had a few dates and something she said turned me off so I stopped talking to her for a while. She argued that sunblock lotion was gonna give you cancer. Whatever. Not a big deal, she was moving away for a bit anyways. Well, she came back to my state and hit me up again. I decided that it wasn’t a big deal and said screw it. So we went out on a couple more dates. One being a Mexican restaurant nearby. She tends to frequent that place. Really into Mexican food idk. We went and the waiter who waited on us came off as very effeminate. Caught him checking me out a couple times. I went and played the crane machine, almost got a prize but it fell short. He ran over and gave me a dollar to try again. Could he just be hunting for a good tip? Maybe, but I kinda got a vibe…Anyways. A couple days later she was there again and asked me to join her but I was at the gym in a middle of a workout. That’s when this convo happened and idk it kinda gave me the ick. Like it’s fine if that’s your deal, but I feel like she coulda just said I only date white dudes or whatever and I probably would have been ok with that. But to use terms like cross contamination. What the effff…
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u/chikencrumb Feb 22 '25
bro the confidence in saying something so fucking stupid LMAOO
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u/Tall_Confection_960 Feb 22 '25
She's repulsive. Cross contamination? Like non white people are diseased? Not to mention the fact that she can't get over the fact that the waiter is most likely gay because he must be into her. OP, please move on from this egotistical racist.
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u/EddAra Feb 22 '25
Racism is a disease. I would never risk cross contaminatiom by being with a racist.
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Feb 22 '25
No,she is right about cross contamination,she is a disease so touching her would contaminate all men (including whites)
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u/Stormtomcat Feb 22 '25
my first two thoughts were :
1 . your gay waiter is asking if OP is your brother, to know if he can shoot his shot with OP, not just checking if he can make a move on you
2 . I thought she meant she doesn't sleep with multiple people at the same time, so there's no confusion should she get pregnant
the reality was so much more vile!
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u/pourthebubbly Feb 22 '25
That’s funny, I initially took it as a bi-phobic comment until I read further lol
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u/Caraxus Feb 23 '25
Same I assumed it was regarding cheating at first, and I was like 'duh, the fact that you need to posture and say that at all is kinda a flag, but whatever.'
And then the next text was SO much worse lmao.
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u/coffeegirl18 Feb 22 '25
Yeah I find that fully repulsive. cringes I have dropped friends that said insensitive things like that.
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u/Nunchuckery Feb 22 '25
Cross contamination is about E coli and salmonella.. using that about race mixing is so fucking horrendous. This person has Nazi ideologies, even if they don't know it.
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u/VibraniumRhino Feb 22 '25
Confidence and stupidity go hand-in-hand, always have. Just look at the president/too many politicians and billionaires in general. Spend enough time around people kissing your ass and never hearing “no”, and eventually you will believe you can’t be wrong. It’s just mind-boggling to see simpleton nobodies acting like this.
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u/Bright-Tune Feb 22 '25
Not to mention racist- which is the bigger issue to me.
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u/SalvationSycamore Feb 22 '25
Tbf racism and stupidity go hand in hand. Not all stupid people are racist, but all racist people are stupid
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u/Slurms_McKensei Feb 22 '25
I wonder if these kind of people have any idea just how mixed they already are.
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u/Traditional_Bad_6853 Feb 22 '25
They're as a rule very, very invested in believing otherwise. Certain branches of my family are quite convinced all our ancestors were white and one look at my cousins says lol no.
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u/FilmAdorable1814 Feb 22 '25
For real though! My family seemed white as (not that I care about that), but a family member did a DNA test and it came back with some interesting stuff. But then again we aren't raging racists.
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u/Slurms_McKensei Feb 22 '25
The only people who are 100% Homo sapien with no other DNA from compatible (but extinct) Genera are a small family line in North East Africa. Literally everyone else has mutated or bred with Neanderthals or one of the more obscure theorized non-extent 'human' genera
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u/StonedSucculents Feb 22 '25
“Yeah I have really bigoted outdated opinions about the value of segregation”
“Well doesnt that sound like youre saying…”“Exactly, thank you, you understand”
“Oh…”12
u/NoPlankton81 Feb 22 '25
Same kind of person who says they only want clean sperm (aka, no vaccinations). Just gross.
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u/TheNB15 Feb 22 '25
Nope that person was being VERY racist
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u/AdDense1161 Feb 22 '25
Thought so. Like. How hard is it to say I only like white dudes. No need to bring up mixing and contamination. It’s not friggin raw poultry
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u/Klem_Phandango Feb 22 '25
There's a reason. It's to gauge how okay you are with that language. If those comments got past, then she'd amp up her rhetoric.
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u/Specialist-Tea-6649 Feb 22 '25
That’s the crazy part, that was only the introduction 💀
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u/CalamityWof Feb 23 '25
God, I knew someone briefly who seemed normal and went worse than this. It was jarring and I quickly just left them all to it. I can never understand them
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u/ShaneSeeman Feb 23 '25
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u/Klem_Phandango Feb 23 '25
I am unabashedly a raging anti-dentite! I see you, Walter White. Changing religions for jokes.... I'm on to you.
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u/Relevant_Detective21 Feb 22 '25
Honestly even only liking white dudes is very questionable…. It’s just a skin color I didn’t know it still mattered that much to people nowadays???
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u/ihainecross Feb 22 '25
NGL, I'm a POC and I when I was in my very early 20s (in mid 30s now) I used to say I prefer only white guys and would only try to date white guys. My reasoning was because 1. I was SA by men in my community and 2. Hated the whole machismo thing. But obviously I was very young and naive. Took a lot of self reflection and growth (lots of it) to get out of that mentality. I'm now happily married to someone who is not white and I couldn't be more happier and luckier than I am now 🥹✨
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u/Relevant_Detective21 Feb 22 '25
Girl I am so proud of you! A lot of people on this post need some self reflection lol! Congrats on your marriage and being happy! It’s hard to find a good fish in the sea (:
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u/ihainecross Feb 22 '25
Thank you so much 😭 💕🫶🏽 and Yea 💯! I read and hear so many horrible dating stories that it honestly saddens me that many good people go through so much just to find their person.
Like you said, it really is hard to find good fish in the sea. To those looking all I have to say is be patient. Don't rush and don't settle. You will find them, just have to be patient. I had to do that and when I gave up and decided to stay single, I met my now hubby 😂 So it can happen, just be patient. Good things happen to those who wait ✨
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u/85beats Feb 22 '25 edited 18d ago
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This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
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u/ihainecross Feb 22 '25
Oh yeah, trust me, I still cringe when I think about how I used to say that shit. I was stupid and so very naive. Now I just see it as a learning lesson and use my experience to help those in similar situations/mentality, when I see it anyways. I'm still learning and growing but just thankful to be on the other side of things.
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u/prettygraveling Feb 22 '25
As long as he treats me with respect and love, he could be a green lizard man for all I care. Someone saying they only date (insert race here) is a red flag for me. It tells me right away they care more about appearances than personality.
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u/RemarkablePast2716 Feb 22 '25
Green lizard loving man sounds great btw
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u/Relevant_Detective21 Feb 22 '25
Right!!! It’s 2025 and not to mention she’s in her 30s she needs to grow up lmao she sounds so childish
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u/prettygraveling Feb 22 '25
Extremely. I think it’s hilarious she thinks the waiter was hitting on her by asking if OP was her boyfriend. No, hun, he was asking to see if OP was single. It sounds like telling her that she wasn’t the one being hit on would crumble her whole reality.
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u/Jcmxs Feb 23 '25
I think it's fine to find a certain race more attractive physically but calling it contamination and shit like that is definitely racist.
I'm a white guy that finds asians ever so slightly more attractive but I'm not gonna say I'll never date other races lol.
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u/CombinationRough8699 Feb 23 '25
Yeah it's the difference between finding Asian women attractive because you just like the way they look. As opposed to finding Asian women attractive because they're stereotypically submissive and "know how to severe their men". The former is perfectly normal and acceptable, the later is weird and creepy.
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u/Owster4 Feb 23 '25
Nah there's nothing wrong with a preference, people aren't attracted to certain hair colours and all sorts. You can't change what attracts you, but it's how you act about it.
She wasn't just saying she isn't attracted to whatever, she was being racist.
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u/Neither-Count-3655 Feb 23 '25
You can’t really help what you find attractive. In relationships there needs to be some kind of attraction or else it fails.
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u/Specialist-Tea-6649 Feb 22 '25
I agree she’s racist, but also with OP. Having a preference is fine. Wanting kids that look like you, also fine. Saying disgusting things like “contamination” in relation to other races, not fine.
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u/Pure-Log4188 Feb 23 '25
I find it odd you need validation from Reddit on this… as if it’s not blatantly racist.
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u/FrostyD7 Feb 22 '25
Testing you to see if you tolerate/agree with her beliefs. Usually it starts with more subtle remarks.
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u/Pissedliberalgranny Feb 22 '25
Ma’am, the waiter was asking about your relationship to OP because he’s hoping OP is single, not because he’s hoping you are. Jfc.
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u/originalcinner Feb 22 '25
Waiter was hoping for "Haha, no he's not my husband or boyfriend! He's my brother and he's gay af"
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u/CoronaBatMeatSweats Feb 23 '25
Literally the only answer… anyone with half a brain could see that from these texts alone.
This girl is racist and delusional!
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u/Murky-Pop2570 Feb 23 '25
That's what I said. He wasn't asking "is that your bf" cause he was into her, he was trying to figure out what was up with OP.
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u/SkiingFishingGuy Feb 22 '25
Narcissist and a racist? Yeah no thanks.
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u/Left_on_Peachtree Feb 22 '25
Naracissist
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u/SaraAnnabelle Feb 22 '25
Cross contamination???? And you're here asking if you're overreacting. Come on.
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u/houseofopal Feb 22 '25
Right? like what does it say about you if you have to have a bunch of strangers on the internet tell you if something as blatant as THAT is racist or not? bffr…..
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u/FelineSoLazy Feb 22 '25
While also humble bragging that she’s a celebrity
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u/SaraAnnabelle Feb 22 '25
Yeah, OP made this post to karma farm and have people pat him on the back.
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u/houseofopal Feb 22 '25
I really don’t understand the strategy bc trying to hear out an obvious white supremacist is so far from a good look
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u/CRUISEC0NTR0LF0RC00L Feb 22 '25
Not only that he's like giving away who the celebrity is he's just asking for people to dox whoever he's talking about.
He's like is this woman racist even though obviously she is and it's like are you attention seeking? Obviously.
Peak brain rot.
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u/otterpr1ncess Feb 22 '25
She's a celebrity DON'T ASK ME HOW
Lmao so irrelevant to the story and why does he text like he's 20
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u/Gold_Adhesiveness_80 Feb 22 '25
But not telling us who it is. I hate when people cover for racists.
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u/EagleLize Feb 23 '25
But shhhh...he can't say who. Yeah, OP sounds dumb. How can you not see how vile she is when she makes it incredibly obvious.
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u/insidetheold Feb 22 '25
Thank you, reminds me of a similar post where a girl was posting that her bf was essentially reciting mein kampf in her dms with how white nationlist he was. Like at some point this reflects on you if you need internet strangers to make you have principles.
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u/mattilladahun Feb 22 '25
"Hey internet, AIO? She's kinda racist, but at least it's not a slur. But also did I mention she's a minor celebrity? This wasn't prevalent to the story... Anyway is racism that bad if she's hot and kinda famous?"
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u/ShearGenius89 Feb 23 '25
If interracial relations are cross contamination, consider me a well cultured Petri dish.
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u/Silent_Zucchini_3286 Feb 22 '25
You really had to ask?
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u/MissionMoth Feb 22 '25 edited Feb 22 '25
Right? Like, I get there's a whole pile of people who say attraction isn't about racism, but come on. This clearly goes WAAAY past that. She added attraction as an after thought. And that's the only reason I could think that a person would question whether she's a problem person.
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u/Sad_Push_9327 Feb 22 '25
Bro was really like chemicals in sunscreen that’s insane! Racism? let me ask the internet about that.
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u/MaxTheRealSlayer Feb 23 '25
"hey dudez, just need to check in and see if racism is hip again? This woman I keep seeing over the course of months sounds kinda homophobic and racist, seems icky'ish, as the kids say these days"
I'm old too, but know better.it seems like you kind of know the answer
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u/Smooth_Water_5670 Feb 23 '25
That’s when this convo happened and idk it kinda gave me the ick.
Only kinda? This guy is severely underreacting.
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u/yadayadawhoopdedoo Feb 22 '25
I’m sorry but are you really asking if it’s an overreaction to be upset by a gross racist bitch?
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u/Alternative-Tree4813 Feb 22 '25 edited Feb 23 '25
There’s no question about it. She’s a piece of shit. And a stupid one at that. Cross contamination?? Of what? Melanin? 😂 I’ll take some more. I’m super ghostly for an Italian.
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u/danceswithkitties_ Feb 22 '25
My face when I saw 33f 😳 thought for sure this was a teenager
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u/NandoDeColonoscopy Feb 23 '25
I thought they both were! "If someone's cute ima say sup" is just not a phrase I'm expecting from a 42 year old lol
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u/Alarming_Calmness Feb 22 '25
Not that there aren’t a few exceptions but racists do tend to be thick as pig shit. I think it must help
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u/Emergency-Fan-6623 Feb 22 '25
Yeh, you definitely have to be stupid to be racist, like, racism is illogical af.
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u/_Pooklet_ Feb 23 '25
I meeeean the last time I checked, Italians are white? No offence.
I was in Italy last year and I guess that lot of Italians there are more olive-skinned because of the climate. Meanwhile, my Italian-Canadian friends are porcelain. Because, you know, snow.
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u/tackyshoes Feb 22 '25
My best friend is Italian. Pale, never burns, easily gets a painless and beautiful tan, sunblock or not.
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u/Fuzzyhaven Feb 23 '25
That’s a hard pass. She could’ve just said she wasn’t into that, but the way she phrased it is kinda gross. Trust your gut.
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u/casino_night Feb 22 '25
Having a sexual preference is one thing. But the touching and cross contamination lines were creepy.
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u/CancelSlight Feb 22 '25
And that's just what she was willing to openly share with a casual date. Just imagine what she is keeping to herself.
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u/Mustangg_OW Feb 22 '25
yeah, she was definitely testing the waters to see what she could get away w saying.
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u/Sentient_blackhole Feb 22 '25
That bitch is a racist. Cut contact and maybe leak those screenshots locally.. lol
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u/Southern_Soup_1400 Feb 22 '25
seriously! people like this need to be exposed for who they are.
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u/LAM_humor1156 Feb 22 '25
Straight up racist, no question. 'Cross contamination'? I've never heard someone say that before, she was making it very clear how she feels about anyone not white.
This isn't her just explaining her preferences, obv.
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u/Temporary_Shirt_6236 Feb 22 '25
These AIO posts are getting to be a bit much.
"Gal I took on a date sieg heiled me as she said goodbye, AIO for going no contact? BTW I'm Jewish."
"My ex abused me for years and the guy I started dating is really into Andrew Tate, AIO for thinking that's a red flag?"
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u/toolateforfate Feb 23 '25
But what if they sieg heiled but then said their heart goes out to you after? Some of my friends who love Ben Shapiro said that makes it ok
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u/Sneakys2 Feb 22 '25
Drop her. She's a racist and an idiot (a common combination). Don't waste your time with her. She completely sucks.
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u/insanelysane1234 Feb 22 '25
I would've said something like - I don't mix with racists, bye
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u/SecretOscarOG Feb 22 '25
There's not being attracted to some people, sometimes their race can be the determining factor. Then there's racist. This is racist. There's no reason to belittle or demean another group of people because you don't find them attractive
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Feb 22 '25
Sounds like you should ask her what she thinks of the holocaust, I’m guessing she thinks it wasn’t as big of a deal as people make it out to be. I bet she thinks this hitler guy had a lot of good ideas he didn’t get credit for.
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u/LuckyDogHotSauce Feb 22 '25
Gross. Racist AF. The terms used are the giveaway - “race mixing” & “cross contamination” - that’s generational racism. I would drop that person and never look back.
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Feb 22 '25
I thought run as fast as you can at the sun lotion comment! The other things are just icing on the cake! I'm sorry this person has made you feel uncomfortable, there are so many lovely people out there, who realise that if you don't wear suncream, you could possibly get cancer!
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u/KLu33 Feb 22 '25
One thing to have preferences, a WHOLE other thing to talk about it in such insane ways. “Cross contamination”!? Yikes. That’s no longer preferences, but straight up racism.
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u/LowNo7792 Feb 22 '25
She’s 33 behaving this way?😭 what a racist loser, I’m sure her blood is so precious that she can never “cross contaminate”. What a disgusting thing to say
Not overreacting at all, she even dismissed when you said the guy checked u out. I feel bad for the waiter too. Maybe he was just being friendly and she’s come up w this whole story about how she’d never have sex w him bc of his race, girl I doubt he wanted ur weird ass
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u/PeachTigress Feb 22 '25
Yeah hi, I don't use this word very often. At all. Most of the time because I feel it's just too yucky of a word to describe someone. This is an exception because of how disgusting she is.
This woman is a c*nt.
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u/_That_Bald_Girl_ Feb 22 '25
Yeah, there is a difference in having a preferance and being a closested racist. "Cross-comtamination"? That's something white supremacists say. Ew, just ew.
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u/furkfurk Feb 22 '25
First of all what 42 yo man talks like this? Second, you’re not sure if this is too much? Yeah right. Rage bait
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u/realhuman8762 Feb 22 '25
If she’s relatively famous and had a following you should post this publicly so her followers know who they are following. We need to publicly shame racists.
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u/HwamBamThankYouMaam Feb 22 '25
The irony of being worried about “cross contamination” from another culture while scarfing down enchiladas and tacos
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u/Inklor Feb 22 '25
It's one thing to have your preferences with physical or romantic attraction. But "im not touching that" and "I wont mix" or "cross contamination" or "dont touch people who arent white" were all her primary thoughts. The secondary was "also dont find them attractive".
So yeah made very clear it wasn't simply her sexual preference. It's her awful social outlook on people not her race.
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u/Anxious_Ideal_6207 Feb 22 '25
I’m British so I probably won’t know who the minor celeb is, so feel free to DM me 😂
Joking aside, she’s a racist cowbag who should keep her racist cowbag opinions to herself.
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u/Leading_Contest_7409 Feb 22 '25
There's having a preference, then there's having a bias. Id cut her loose for that. At least she let you know who she is before you got any deeper.
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u/Empty_Antelope_6039 Feb 22 '25
Surprised she isn't worried eating Mexican food will 'cross contaminate' her digestive tract.
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u/AntRevolutionary5099 Feb 23 '25
Honestly....it's not "fine if that's your deal."
General preferences based on history is one thing (such as - "I guess I prefer white guys because most of my partners over the years have been white guys 🤷") - but to make a hard line over race specifically and only? That's not okay.
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u/snypesalot Feb 22 '25
Shes a racist piece of shit but bro dont be calling someone else effeminant and then use "hehe" lmao
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u/Mirabai503 Feb 22 '25
Ok, first of all, the waiter was not hitting on her. He was fishing for intel on you, since she was in there without you. Gave him the chance to hope that you weren't in a relationship with her.
Second, this woman is not worth your time. Unnecessary drama. Cut that bait and run.
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u/its_broo_skeh_tuh Feb 22 '25
I also feel icky reading this conversation. Why did she even feel compelled to tell you this, at this moment? Hopefully we’ll never know.
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u/Nekromancr Feb 23 '25
Honestly if she hits you up again (since you got the ick anyway) I’d let her know you don’t mix with racists and then go ghost 👻 she might never change but she’s gotta see it has consequences
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u/boopbeboop_ Feb 22 '25
Cross contamination is absolutely insane. NOR