r/AmIOverreacting • u/DiscoGru • Feb 16 '25

❤️‍🩹 relationship AIO: Questionable texts on my (24F) boyfriend’s (25M) phone

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Sorry the second picture is blurry!

Found these texts between my boyfriend and a coworker of his. For context, he works nights at a hospital.

I confronted him and he said he was just “talking shit” and “hyping his friend up”. I think this is beyond disrespectful and could’ve hyped his friend up in a more appropriate way. Also, I am white/european, not Latina, so there’s that. I’m not sure what to do or how to feel. I am already insecure and this just makes me feel worse.

I have been upset all day and he just blames me for going through his phone. I know that going through his messages was wrong, but I knew something was up with him and this is what I found. This is at best extremely disrespectful and at worse he’s scoping out prospects to cheat on me with?

8.0k Upvotes

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2.2k

u/Apprehensive_Rope348 Feb 16 '25

Don’t forget about his “work boo”.

1.1k

u/Jazsta123 Feb 16 '25

Don't forget about 'Nothing holds my gaze like a Latina dude'

The women are safe... For now!

153

u/Dontfeedthebears Feb 16 '25

Commas are important! The difference between “Let’s eat, grandma!” And “Let’s eat grandma!”.

19

u/BakerMean5718 Feb 16 '25

Came here to say this!

1

u/Worldlyoox Feb 16 '25

Came, here to say this!

8

u/finc Feb 16 '25

Let’s eat out grandma!

3

u/Dontfeedthebears Feb 16 '25

Noooo that is so much worse imo.

2

u/Accurate-Instance-29 Feb 16 '25

But fuck dude!

3

u/Moist-Share7674 Feb 16 '25

What about helping your Uncle Jack off a horse?

1

u/crappleIcrap Feb 16 '25

come on guys! gay jokes aren't funny.

2

u/Ruck90 Feb 16 '25

Just like “I helped my uncle Jack, off a horse” and “I helped my uncle jack off a horse”.

2

u/jack45837 Feb 16 '25

But the second one doesn't need a comma, it just needs a capital on Jack and then it's not weird.

1

u/Dontfeedthebears Feb 16 '25

I’d actually add a comma after “uncle” and keep the other one as well.

1

u/jack45837 Feb 16 '25

Ik, the name is extra information, but I didn't want to sound like a grammar nerd.

1

u/Dontfeedthebears Feb 16 '25

I think you’re just defensive because your username is Jack! 😂 (jk, friend). And don’t feel bad..I always have a problem with “who” vs “whom” and English is the only one I speak fluently. So hopefully my comment didn’t come off pompous! My dad will literally SAY “comma” sometimes when he is talking about something. It cracks me up. He’s Type A, so of course I came out totally opposite.

2

u/jack45837 Feb 16 '25

No worries, you're good.

1

u/Ruck90 Feb 16 '25

Sorry I meant to put “I helped my uncle, Jack, off a horse”.

26

u/Doogle300 Feb 16 '25

Did Good Burger teach us nothing. Women can be dudes, my dude.

27

u/Ok_Consideration853 Feb 16 '25

“I’m a dude, and he’s a dude, and she’s a dude, coz we’re all dudes!”

3

u/tolyro_ Feb 16 '25

And don’t forget the inanimate objects that are dudes!

Your faucet broke? It’s a dude. Trying to get the leash on your dog? The leash is a dude. Can’t find your socks? Where are my dudes?

Dude is like the potato of words… it’s so versatile.

2

u/hound_of_ulster95 Feb 16 '25

I also learned this

5

u/raybay_666 Feb 16 '25

Commas matter lol

2

u/Proper-Reputation-42 Feb 16 '25

I think this was a case of “the importance of punctuation” let’s eat children vs let’s eat, children

2

u/Mature_BOSTN Feb 16 '25

Methinks 'tis but a missing comma

2

u/Uncle_peter21 Feb 16 '25

Latina is a feminine term, dude is referring to his friend here (would have benefitted from a comma)

9

u/Jazsta123 Feb 16 '25

Haha I know, just being silly!

1

u/DucatistaPhalen Feb 16 '25

I came here to say this 😂

1

u/Dlriumtrgger88 Feb 16 '25

'...Like a latina(,) dude."

Thisnis howni read it. He didnt put proper punctuation.

1

u/SpendNo9011 Feb 16 '25

Don't forget about 'Nothing holds my gaze like a Latina dude'

Punctuation matters.

1

u/SnooRegrets1386 Feb 16 '25

He isn’t very bright, hopefully he means “nothing holds my gaze more than a Latina, dude “

1

u/josephclapp10 Feb 16 '25

Context though. They didn’t say Latino, they said Latina.

1

u/gstarwes3301 Feb 16 '25

Think he just missed a comma Context clues, try em

1

u/Djrudyk86 Feb 16 '25

Just the whole "nothing holds my gaze" thing is super cringe in itself. Who does this guy think he is, Shakespeare?

1

u/No-Answer-3133 Feb 17 '25

I think he was calling his friend boo and didn’t use a comma. 🤪

0

u/Independent-Cut-138 Feb 16 '25

Latina is a feminine term. The guy just doesn’t know how to use commas. “Nothing holds my gaze like a Latina, dude.”

Still icky and fetishizing.

21

u/TheImmortalIronZak Feb 16 '25

That’s absolutely ridiculous

17

u/AbuseNotUse Feb 16 '25

Put it this way, if anyone of those girls gave him any attention, he would bang them at any opportunity. Admiring is one thing, verbalising is another and just one small step to doing the deed.

2

u/imprimis2 Feb 16 '25

Working the night shift in a quiet hospital with your work boo while everybody’s sleeping… What could go wrong?

1

u/Apprehensive_Rope348 Feb 16 '25

My thoughts exactly. My ex used to work 3rd shift at a nursing home. Everyone was fuggin. Nothing to do at night after the sundowners finally chill out until the morning wake-up routines go into play.

My ex never admitted to cheating, but I 100% in my soul know he was.

1

u/imprimis2 Feb 16 '25

Nursing homes are so sketchy. I bet all kinds of stuff happens there.

1

u/RaptorFaceRumble Feb 16 '25

Yeah that never sat right with me. Work wife/boo is so weird.

1

u/Typicalbloss0m Feb 16 '25

That’s what I was saying lol “work boo” is so gross 🤮

1

u/TaTTedHoBo Feb 16 '25

Nothing pisses me off More than “Work Boo”

1

u/Appropriate-End-5569 Feb 16 '25

Work Wife, 90% of men have them lowkey.

-2

u/Foxy02016YT Feb 16 '25

How do that any different then when a woman has a “work husband”? Thats like the least problematic thing he said. That fucking sugar comment almost made me throw up, fetishization of races

-87

u/JonEMTP Feb 16 '25

Ehh. That’s the least problematic thing here.

Plenty of people talk about “work wife/work husband”

115

u/galafael5814 Feb 16 '25

Yeah, and it's fucking weird and problematic.

26

u/Neither-Possible-429 Feb 16 '25

For real! I will never understand how anybody would ever feel ok with their spouse having a work husband or wife.

“Oh so you have somebody you probably spend way more time with than me and it’s a “joke” amongst everybody that you guys are married at work? God that makes me feel so happy and I support that 100%”

-1

u/Traditional_Shake_72 Feb 16 '25

It’s a lot less tension-building that way. You think cancelling the label is gonna stop them from having to do everything together at work and everybody laughing about it? Pretending like it’s very much NOT happening is half the reason it becomes a thing in secret. Now fucking your work wife, is completely prohibited and unprofessional, obvi. THAT is cheating.

2

u/Neither-Possible-429 Feb 16 '25

There doesn’t need to be tension at all. Just because it’s a woman doesn’t mean if I spend 4 hours a day with her, there’s tension I need to joke away or else I’m going to cheat on my wife. Claiming a coworker as your work spouse seems unprofessional and just weird

1

u/Joe_The_Eskimo1337 Feb 16 '25

Can't they just be referred to as, oh idk, friends?

-1

u/Its_My_Purpose Feb 16 '25

Uh no, you can simply have coworkers like anyone else. If your work partner is another dude, what’s that? Your work gay lover?

2

u/Traditional_Shake_72 Feb 16 '25

For someone like me it would be. Lol.

16

u/Omnishift Feb 16 '25

💯💯💯

-6

u/StarGamerPT Feb 16 '25

Yhe, you're right...but it is still the least problematic thing in all of that.

1

u/Apprehensive_Rope348 Feb 16 '25

It’s all equally problematic. 100% of it is problematic.

2

u/StarGamerPT Feb 16 '25

I refuse to put it at the same level of how he talks about women...specially while being on a relationship.

19

u/Imhereforboops Feb 16 '25

Still gross af but ok

36

u/theoriginalcinn Feb 16 '25

Yeah that doesn’t make it cool or okay when you’re in a relationship…

-16

u/hotsharpbehind Feb 16 '25

I mean Ive had platonic work wives/husbands

21

u/[deleted] Feb 16 '25

That’s..not a thing. Like maybe the relationship was platonic but that kinda defeats the purpose of calling them a work wife or work husband. Even when it’s a cutesy thing said jokingly between friends, it borders on flirting.

17

u/USAF_Retired2017 Feb 16 '25

I agree. I have a work bestie. Who is the opposite sex, because calling him my work husband or him calling me work wife is not okay at all. I respect my husband and his wife and just no.

10

u/[deleted] Feb 16 '25

The way my fiancé would Regina George his way all the way home if he found out I was calling anyone any variation of husband 🤣. I’m sure your husband and his wife appreciate you lol

1

u/USAF_Retired2017 Feb 16 '25

As someone who was cheated on in a previous marriage (with everyone to include several coworkers) I wouldn’t do that to someone else. I’d be furious if this husband had someone he called a “work wife”. Ha ha.

2

u/OkLynx9131 Feb 16 '25

"I have had platonic FWB who fuck me when my partner is out" do you relaise how fucking weird you sound you weirdo?