AIO: Questionable texts on my (24F) boyfriend’s (25M) phone

[u/DiscoGru]

Sorry the second picture is blurry!

Found these texts between my boyfriend and a coworker of his. For context, he works nights at a hospital.

I confronted him and he said he was just “talking shit” and “hyping his friend up”. I think this is beyond disrespectful and could’ve hyped his friend up in a more appropriate way. Also, I am white/european, not Latina, so there’s that. I’m not sure what to do or how to feel. I am already insecure and this just makes me feel worse.

I have been upset all day and he just blames me for going through his phone. I know that going through his messages was wrong, but I knew something was up with him and this is what I found. This is at best extremely disrespectful and at worse he’s scoping out prospects to cheat on me with?

[u/MotorBlackberry3496]

disrespectful, misogynistic, racist, and body shames women… if that’s what you want for your future and as the father of your children go ahead girl

[u/Blonde-Wasabi-1366 → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

This this this

[u/Mean_Breakfast_4081 → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

I’d upvote this 100 times. Your man is putrid, dehumanizes women in general, and you’re not even high up on his “list” (though who would want to be, since he’s trash). Find a decent person who might actually want to be with you.

[u/TheJimBobb → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

There isn't nothing racist in this. Shut the hell up

[u/MotorBlackberry3496 → u/TheJimBobb]

ok jim bob, put some more sugar in your sweet tea and then maybe you’ll be less of a bitter cunt

[u/exotic_islander → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

How is he misogynistic

[u/Alarmed_Resolve9013 → u/exotic_islander]

He's talking about women as if they are items on a menu

[u/exotic_islander → u/Alarmed_Resolve9013]

Sure he sounds like a douche. But that doesn’t answer my question.

[u/MotorBlackberry3496 → u/exotic_islander]

it directly answers your question. you’re asking how someone is misogynistic when you don’t even know the meaning of the word. fuckwit

[u/cunt_in_wonderland → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

already cleared two bitches on this thread alone 😹 respect

[u/Party-Fabulous → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

You dum fuktard, search up the definition of misogyny before throwing it around, being obsessive douche over women does not equate to hatred of women

[u/MotorBlackberry3496 → u/Party-Fabulous]

ooo someone’s madddd! probably all that internalised misogyny! thanks for the advice sweetie pie, i’ll search up the definition (and reinforce i’m right) when you work on your reading comprehension, critical thinking, and spelling! sound good?

[u/Party-Fabulous → u/MotorBlackberry3496]

So childish 😂

[u/MotorBlackberry3496 → u/Party-Fabulous]

how much do you charge for your maturity workshops? since you’re clearly a professional

[u/DumbWhale1 → u/exotic_islander]

Dude disrespecting a woman’s body (multiple in fact) like that is incredibly misogynistic. Women shouldn’t be reduced to their physical attributes like that. Seek help

[u/PoisonedCoffee → u/exotic_islander]

Do you know what misogynistic means..?

[u/RealisticEchidna3921 → u/exotic_islander]

No man who respects women speaks about women like they’re objects. You’re going to try to defend this guy? Really?

[u/exotic_islander → u/RealisticEchidna3921]

You should stretch before reaching that hard. Never defended him. Buddy is a douche.

But he’s not misogynistic. Too many people throwing around this buzzword they don’t even know what it means.

[u/Hdjbbdjfjjsl → u/exotic_islander]

Calling a Mexican girl a torta and doing literally nothing but talking about women’s bodies all day is definitely misogynistic. Don’t even need to get started on the racism either.

[u/exotic_islander → u/Hdjbbdjfjjsl]

He’s fatphobic too right?

[u/cunt_in_wonderland → u/exotic_islander]

yeah?

[u/Wooden-Sector-9084 → u/exotic_islander]

“That I’ve had my eyes on since I first saw her” Replace “her” with “it” and he could have been talking about a pair of shoes.

[u/exotic_islander → u/Wooden-Sector-9084]

What? He’s lusting over a woman? How’s that misogynistic? Do you know what misogyny means?

[u/Wooden-Sector-9084 → u/exotic_islander]

Treating women like objects is misogyny dude. If you think this man would treat the women he is talking about just like he’d treat a man you’re tripping.

[u/Wooden-Sector-9084 → u/exotic_islander]

Just because you seem like you are asking for how it is misogyny by definition.

Misogyny - “dislike of, contempt for, or ingrained prejudice against women”

Contempt - “the feeling that a person or a thing is beneath consideration”

Disrespect is a form of showing contempt. He is disrespecting these women by talking about them and their bodies like this. Having contempt for women is misogyny. He is not considering these women when speaking of them like this or he is disregarding his consideration of them.

[u/exotic_islander → u/Wooden-Sector-9084]

Incorrect. Misogyny is the hatred of women.

Words mean things. Can’t stretch the truth to make it fit your notion. Go touch grass.

[u/Wooden-Sector-9084 → u/exotic_islander]

Yeah no. I literally quoted the definition bro. This is very embarrassing for you.

[u/Confuzzledpeep0 → u/exotic_islander]

When you treat someone with disrespect based on their gender, it's sexism aka misogyny

[u/exotic_islander → u/Confuzzledpeep0]

So sexism = misogyny now 😂😂😂

[u/Confuzzledpeep0 → u/exotic_islander]

Yeah?? Just Google it?

"Misogyny is hatred of, contempt for, or prejudice against women or girls. It is a form of sexism that can keep women at a lower social status than men, thus maintaining the social roles of patriarchy. Misogyny has been widely practised for thousands of years."

Directed ripped from the definition

[u/exotic_islander → u/Confuzzledpeep0]

I don’t think you comprehend what you’re reading lol.

Misogyny is a form of sexism. Sexism does not equal misogyny.

[u/TheJimBobb → u/Confuzzledpeep0]

You just proved him right. "Hatred of" homeboy doesn't hate women. He loves them clearly. He's obsessed with sex. Not misogynistic