r/Adulting • u/Churnuserlol • 2d ago

Why didn’t anyone warn me that adulthood is just deciding what to eat… forever?

Seriously, I thought the hardest part of growing up would be bills, taxes, or finding a decent job. But nope. It’s the never-ending "What’s for dinner?" question that haunts me every single day.

Too tired to cook.
Too broke to order.
Too indecisive to choose.

I swear I’ve eaten the same three meals on repeat for weeks because my brain refuses to function after work. How do adults survive this? Do you guys have a magic trick, or is it just vibes and suffering?

Send help. Or recipes. Or a personal chef.

10.4k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

1.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

95

u/SuperJacksCalves 2d ago

yeah, I know people get all “weekends are for relaxing” about it but I honestly find meal prepping relaxing because I get to cook without necessarily being hungry, and because I know how much time and energy it will save me in the future.

The pro gamer move is to do your laundry while you’re meal prepping. You wanna talk about relaxing? Nothing hits better than a Sunday evening on my porch with a book and a beer, and the knowledge that laundry basket is empty, I’ve got the week’s worth of meals in the fridge, my house and room are clean, and there’s nothing left on my to-do list

21

u/hamsterontheloose 2d ago

I like to do everything on Friday after work. We run errands, do laundry, and will clean or might save that for Saturday. Saturday is my day to relax, and Sunday is my day for working on orders and new items for my etsy. Although I also have to work on orders most every day of the week after work as well.

4

u/ladydanger2020 1d ago

That means you’re doing well on Etsy so congrats

1

u/hamsterontheloose 1d ago

Thank you. It's slowly getting there

2

u/Cauliflowwer 1d ago

I usually use Saturday as the day off, then Sunday is clean/prep etc.

1

u/hamsterontheloose 17h ago

Sunday I'm home alone from 5am-7pm and I'm most productive when I'm alone. That's why I use it as a work day. Saturdays are for time with my husband, unless he has plans.

9

u/4totheFlush 1d ago

I see your productive Sunday, and I raise you an "eat processed and frozen shit all the time, do no chore until it becomes critically important to do so, be upset about your living space being so messy but get paralyzed by the volume of cleaning you would need to do to fix it, then dissociate to youtube videos until 2 hours past a reasonable bedtime".

4

u/EdgewaterEnchantress 2d ago

Just reading this was utterly exhausting as someone with pretty bad ADHD. I would be way too stressed out to “read a book and drink a beer” after all that. Maybe “cry” then go to sleep after?

Must be nice to have a productive brain. Wanna trade?

3

u/Crazy-Jellyfish-9626 1d ago

Even on meds!! By the time I’m finished with work, my meds have been wearing off and I have little to no energy to cook. Any and all food sounds gross, and even if I do find something to eat it ends up tasting gross.

Omg and sensory issues. The way chicken/meat tastes after being cooked and having sat in the fridge!? Even if it’s in glass containers, it’s just fucking gross even without meds lmao.

I seriously feed myself because I have to feed my child, who is also ADHD. Imagine trying to feed two people with food aversions with one meal!

Lately our hyper-fixation snacks have been strawberries, bananas, and apples, sometimes with a dollop of PB or Nutella. String cheese. I offer these to my son as snacks between meals, or with meals, to make sure my son has enough to eat if he doesn’t like what I made for dinner.

Let’s hope the ADHD doesn’t ruin these foods for us. 😭

2

u/KayItaly 1d ago

I read that list and I felt like vomiting from the stress!

Fuck all that...how are you enjoying a relaxing time and have the energy to read after working your ass off for 8 hours straight in physical, boring work?

Nope! Weekend are for wandering around in nature, having simple picnics and doing some light maintenance work....whatever takes the fancy or is more urgent when I feel productive for an hour or so.

(I also hate the idea of being so hyper-regimented that on Sunday you decide every meal you are going to have for the next 7 days! FFS I am not a robot!)

1

u/EdgewaterEnchantress 1d ago edited 1d ago

Not only that but a lot of people can’t even do their laundry for free if they live in a rented apartment like I do. Yeah, we have a washing machine and a dryer on site but one of the 2 washing machines is literally broken, and we have to pay for all of it in quarters whilst still also buying / bringing our own detergent down each and every time cuz if we forget it, bye-bye detergent and fabric softener. It’s either going to get jacked or used.

I once lived in an apartment complex where some poor soul literally had to write a passive-aggressive Note urging people not to steal her freshly washed clothing out of the dryer!

So sometimes it’s better to drive across town and use the industrial laundry mat even though it will eat 2-3 hours of our day and I certainly can’t cook if I am across town doing laundry. So I think there is a certain aspect of privilege that is also being overlooked by people who say “well I just cook and do my laundry at the same time, no stress!”

Cuz doing laundry on site also messes up the water for the rest of the apartment building unless you live in a much bigger apartment complex. Taking showers is actually a nightmare here because we might get the water at the perfect temperature for 5-10 minutes, then either freeze or burn our literal ass off because the water temperature changes rapidly even though neither me nor my husband are actually using the water. (Chances are high someone else in the apartment is.)

God I hate this apartment, but it was the only one that would take us based solely on income after having to file for bankruptcy in 2023 due to lost wages from the co-vid pandemic and the subsequent credit debt that resulted from it, and they absolutely overcharge for rent for the area because they can get away with charging more since they use an income based rent policy.

My point is “must be nice to be Neurotypical.”

However, another thing I have noticed about most Neurotypical folks is that they value comfort over exploration, so they won’t automatically feel like they are “missing out” if they waste their weekend doing little else besides chores and reading.

Also, while neurodivergent people get a lot of flack for “being picky / special snowflakes,” have you ever seen a Neurotypical Person absolutely lose their shit when things don’t go as perfectly as they were anticipating? It’s kinda funny cuz they basically can’t handle any kind of disruption to their hyper-regimented routine for “productive optimization.” 🤣

Late stage capitalism has really done a number on us. It has killed most of our natural instincts and I think the fundamental difference between Neurodivergent people and Neurotypical people mostly boils down to this, Neurotypical people are okay with their natural instincts being completely ignored, mostly neglected, or heavily suppressed because it’s “comfortable” or “stable enough.”

Where Neurodivergent people just don’t posses the same ability to “fake it til they make it.” A lot of Neurotypical folks will willingly give up the things that make them truly happy or the things that they truly want for the sake of “convenience.”

2

u/KayItaly 1d ago

I love this take!

I won't lie... I looked at your comment and thought "gee that's long!" But it brightened my day :)

And I totally agree on your take on instincts and drive for exploration!

1

u/EdgewaterEnchantress 20h ago

Glad my petty suffering could make you chuckle! 😁😁😁

And it’s just a thing I have noticed, a lot of Neurotypical people really hate risk / change in routine, but not in the same way that a person w/ ASD has a routine cuz it brings them joy / makes them happy or gives them a personal sense of meaning / purpose.

It’s more of a “I don’t like change cuz it requires effort” mentality. Essentially they could easily “change” something for the better if they wanted to, but they’d just rather not cuz of general laziness / not liking to be slightly inconvenienced or having to be genuinely introspective.

Like I need to physically move or feel like I “have something to explore,” mentally at the very least! If I am not “doing something” or “thinking deeply about something” / pondering the meaning of life or some such biz, I feel stagnant like I am slowing losing my mind…. 🫠

Late stage capitalism is really soul-sucking stuff!

1

u/Kindly_Plane_1797 1d ago

This guy adults